I opened my eyes and I saw a child...

a cheer full child with a beautiful smile,

a beautiful clear eyes,

a beautiful,soft,kind,giving child...

I can see in his eyes that his so CLEAR and CLEAN...

his always smiling,appreciating what he get, thankfull of what he have...

and i notice my eyes become blerd

and I notice an tears falling from my eyes

and my eyes opened wide with shock..... thinking

what is with this feeling?

and suddenly I woke up

and I realize that that boy is me when I'm younger....

I wish I would just stay there with so many Cheer full people, nice places,relaxing and fresh community

and I stand up from bed to ready for school...

as i walk downstair I heard some noises...

I heard some laughing in the balcony

and I saw my whole family

laughing together talking about there happy past........TOGETHER

but I just walk through in front of them pretending like no one is there without even looking any of them........

hours later*

I got home happily with my 99 score

but i stop........

I saw them smiling looking at my sibling 94 score at the exam....

I listen to them saying

"u got 94 my dear congratulation what would u like to eat tonight?"

and I hid my paper at my back....as I heard them

and they glare at me and said

"what about u 99 again? try to make ur score perfect next time"

and i feel something strange

and get back to my room and keep my paper as I always do and I saw all my memories alone in there seing all my scores my perfect score my thropy's my first place certificate....all of them and I realize how many times I try so hard to get there attentions and I realize they don't care at all no nothing

I tried so hard and i got nothing from them just all from my self...nothing

NOTHING...😞😦

I cried all night realizing of how dumb I am how stupid I am

thinking how many stupid things I've done for them

I did all I did even the things I don't like I always work hard to get it, to win it, just to get there stupid and cheap little attention

I laught I bit

but until I remember something in my head

I said

"ohhhhh hahaha hahahaha,hahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

how foolish am I, I totally forgot that they don't want me in the first place they don't even want me to be born in the first place🙂😂🙂😂🙂😂🙂😂🙂😂🙂☺🙂☺🙂hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahagaggagahahag

and I cried again and cried laughing and laughing like I'm also laughing to myself coz I look so pathetic that I can't control my feelings

ha😂hu😭ha😂hu😭 witch one us real then I guess nothing is real its fake its all fake omg...

I can't control my tears anymore...

I'm already full...

like a overfull tank thats about to explode becose of fullness...