For the one who used to be my sunshine. 

There are love stories written, spanning a lifetime: how happy, pure and beautiful these are! Being able to walk with the loved one from young to old, that alone is enough to fill the gaps in the soul and erase the bitterness of life with harmony, sharing with him or her. That luck, both simple and the most luxurious in the world.

Why luxury? Because the world is not always colored. If the other is happy, one is sad; The planet always has the poor and also rich people. Just like love, not every difficult love has a tragic ending, but at the same time not all sweet love comes to a happy destination.

Like you and I, you- the person who had the number 057 that I will always remember as a teenager.

I met you on a windy autumn afternoon, under the intense and stifling pressure of the harsh test. A timid girl like me, lazy to make friends like me, confused in the middle of the turns like me, suddenly sat next to you, suddenly wanting to be a better person to walk with you .

And so, you default to being the torch that guides me, the perseverance, the effort, and the motivation for me to get to the end of the road.

You- with the number 057, and I was 076, it didn’t have anything related to each other, and yet I was still sitting next to you.

That's why I like you. It's really weird.

I don't remember how our first conversation went, but I can't forget the shining eyes that resolutely didn't take my help when you got into troubled sentences, or the lovely naive awkwardness when you put your room number down to name, the number of the name’s list candidate becomes a class and even confused the name between one test and another. I liked the way you thank me sincerely even though I didn't do anything big for you. All my life, I've never believed in lightning love, but seeing your sun-like smile for the first time has sparked several indescribable emotions in me.

So I just told these feelings for the only one- my best friend. You had already asked for my class name, but I didn't dare ask your name, just call you 057. "057" became a special name that I would have liked to call quietly every day.

I quietly searched for your class name in the list of examinees. For the first time from a bored Facebook player boldly asked for one's info. For the first time, I actively inbox with a boy to enter that person's life. Looking back, I see how carefree and passionate I was at the time.

You were in morning class, I was in afternoon class, you were in building A, I was in building C, that's a lot apart, but it didn’t stop me from liking you. Yes, I liked you that way, even if anyone asks me why, I don't know. The first vibration of life gradually became a favorite, then into love, making me try to study, try to change myself to become perfect, try to learn everything about you.

You liked black coffee because it helped you stay awake, he hated milk because he found it childish and a bit taser. I used to hate bitterness, but because I liked you, I found black coffee sweet and rejected milk as a natural reflex.

You were always on the school's gold board but did not rise to the top 10 because he was dragged english. I used to hate learning bitterly but because I liked you, risking my life to study, especially focusing on foreign languages, I even took an IELTS degree to show off to him and help him learn.

You loved painting, each of your paintings had theirs very delicate and unique soul. I don't have an artistic talent, but I'm still learning basic techniques online to have a topic to talk with you.

You said you wanted to take a running test. I hated the movement because I was basically quiet, but to be selected to play with you, to be by your side, I quietly got up early every day to practice running frantically.

My change for the better stunned my family, who guessed that I liked someone. With the exception of my best friend, I wouldn’t tell anyone more. But thank you, because of you I've been so much better. I could walk with you every day, not only in form but also mentally, which made me really happy.

“What do you think if we start a relationship on friendship and under love?”, didn't I say that on April Fools' Day, you simply thought I was poking you, responding with a warm smile, and one more time giving me hope.

One day you liked to drink milk and give up coffee. When I asked, you said you wanted to be taller. I was a little surprised, but also quietly corrected your preferences in the notebook with no doubt.

Then I found out that you risked your life to learn English like I did, I didn't think much, just tried to hone more to help you.

You didn’t paint anymore, turned to the art of music, I simply thought that you want to try something new, and cheered a lot. You said “thank you!”, as sincere as it had been, I continued to embrace your hope of being half.

Through the 10th and 11th grade with you, my life sparkled with light pink and beautiful fragrant...

At the beginning of the 12th I was about to confess my love, when you suddenly confided in me, saying that you liked someone — but it wasn't me. It hurts even more when you says, "Because you're my best friend, I dare say it" and it's the same awkwardness as the day of the test, but that expression is no longer for me...

You wanted to be taller, because she liked tall boys. That's all, but you were willing to drink something you hate so much.

You put a lot of effort into studying English, because you wanted to participate in the same team with her, even though you had said that English was the hardest thing to “swallow”.

You moved from drawing to music, not because you wanted to try, but because you wanted to have the topic of talking to the person you loved. It was simple, but it made you put in many effort.

Suddenly, I saw myself in you. I changed and tried for you, you changed all your preferences for her . We... It's really the same, isn't it?

Why isn't the person you like not me? Why is it that I like you? I laughed at myself, and it turned out that everything had been my own myth so far.

Ever since I liked you, I've had the ability to find you instantly in the crowd. Two years ago I saw the image of you shining all over the schoolyard, this year, too, you was still sunny, still warm, still being the sun in me; But the sun turned itself into the moon that revolved around the earth's orbit — and the earth was the girl you fell in love as the same way I loved you.

How many negative emotions were all over me? Envy there, jealousy, blame, greater is enviousness- enviousness that I couldn’t tell anyone - especially to you. I used to hate woman who are not able to catch the main man’s heart in fantasy stories or some kind of books like that, because of the sour lemons emanating from that person, but who knows if I'm always the supporting female character in your story? I'm sorry, but I sympathized with that type of woman, but I didn't have the courage to dispute the love you gave her.

You are the halfway year between adulthood and children, smiles and tears. You are a green spring, brilliant summer, lovely autumn and winter full of sentimentality. After all, you are the one who I loved very much, the sunshine warmed my soul. Even if we don't share the same path tomorrow, you'll still be the sun in me— a big star that warms the whole galaxy, a guiding light.

Thank you, again and again, for being my youth! It gave me a lot of emotions for my childhood. Thank you for helping me become a much better person than I used to be. Although you don't love me, the effort I've made because of you will never be wasted and make me regret loving you. Finally, I wish you all happiness and peace with every choice of yours!

Once, a friend named Chi who lives in Da Nang asked me, "Huy, what does Saigon mean to you?"

I nonchalantly replied, "Nothing."

So she spent a few hundred words scolding me for not loving where I live. Why blame me, Saigon is just a gray, crowded city. Not everyone has free time to pick up every little good thing of Saigon to force themselves to love it.

Suddenly, Chi ended her presentation with a question: "Do you know Luong Nhu Hoc Street?"

" Of course!" Who doesn't know that lantern street? When I was a kid, my dad always took me there every Mid-Autumn Festival to play. Now there are still six or seven blue-and-red lanterns in the corner of my house from a few years ago.

"It's mid-autumn in the next three weeks!" She texted me with a cute smiley face icon. "Don’t forget to go there and take a picture and send it to me!"

"OK!" I didn't think much, answered as briefly as I could in order to do my homework, nor did I know how much responsibility I had taken on.

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It's seven o'clock. I stand on the side of  Tran Hung Dao Street, looking at the land of light in front of me. There are only lanterns, why are people crowded like that?

I remember there was a tea shop which was owned by a Northern woman. After waiting many hours to buy the star lantern, my father and I always came to her shop and had a cup of tea, which made us feel better every time by its cool and sweet tastes . I haven’t met her for a long time, and I don't see the tea shop now, I don't know where she has moved to. 

The September wind blows over the top of my head, causing my hair to fly. For a moment, I stop as if I could see something fluttering in front of me. "How long has it been since I've been here yet?" In the star-colored twilight, a whole road of Luong Nhu Hoc Street lit up like a dragon's body running along, shimmering, brilliant and very dear. I look up for a moment, something which has hidden deeply inside me gradually appears in my mind, making me freeze in some seconds. 

When my father wasn't addicted to work, he used to take me around five or six times before going home. We used to visit the bald old man's shop the most. In fact, that man wasn't bald. I heard he was sick and his hair was gone. The bald man didn’t sell the kind of star lantern I like, but he had several beautiful carp lanterns. My grandmother liked carp, and dad bought her some to decorate our house for the Mid-Autumn festival.

The bald man died a few years ago, I know by asking a salesperson. I reply to her indifferently and then buy three carp lanterns. One for dad, one for my grandma and one for Chi in Da Nang. 

"Mom, Mom!" A child’s calling out from inside the store. I think he's the woman’s child. He asks, "Can we go out now, Mom?"

The owner pays me the money, the lovelingly replies:” Ok, wait for me to close the shop!”

Looking at them for a while, I suddenly say to her, "It's a pleasure to be your child, you are such a good mother when you can be patient and treat your son well ."

"Ha ha!" The owner smiles and wipes her sweat with her hands. "He's young now, and I'm still healthy. I'm taking him a little bit away. If I don’t spend my time for him now, it will be too late when I get older"

After a few words, I left so that the owner would close the shop. The flow of people has gone away, but the color of the lamp is still shimmering. I heard somewhere the drumming of the lion dance troupe mixed with the crunching laughter of the children. The kids will grow up later. They will no longer be interested in dolls, trains, shimmering lanterns... They will get caught up in the flow of life. And this little street, perhaps, will become the old film of a distant time. Maybe they'll put it all away and move forward or maybe they'll pack up the video, put it in a discreet compartment in their heart, save it.

I remember something important, and I quickly take out the camera. Suddenly, Chi's message passes through my brain for a moment.

"Huy, what does Saigon mean to you?"

I looked at the nose of my shoes. It seems that my eyes are being blurred, tens of thousands of shimmering lanterns turned into sparkling colored spots. The wind made my coat swell. I abruptly know the answer for Chi’s question. 

“Saigon to me is my beautiful childhood memories.”