SATURDAY, AUGUST 31

Sometimes I wonder if my mom is BRAIN DEAD. Then there are days when Iknow she is.

Like today.The drama started this morning when I casually asked if she would buy me oneof those cool new iPhones that do almost everything. I considered it a necessityof life, second only to maybe oxygen.

What better way to clinch a spot in the CCP (Cute, Cool & Popular) group at

my new private school, Westchester Country Day, than by dazzling them with a wicked new cell.

Last year, it seemed like I was the ONLY student in my ENTIRE middle school

who didn’t have one☹ . So I bought an older, used phone supercheap on eBay.

It was bigger than what I wanted, but I figured I couldn’t go wrong for the

clearance price of only $12.99.

I put my telephone in my locker and spread the word that everyone could now call me with all the JUICY gossip on my NEW telephone! Then I counted down the minutes before my social life started heating up.

I got really nervous when two of the CCP girls came walking down the hall in

my direction chatting on their cell phones.

They came right over to my locker and started acting superfriendly. Then they

invited me to sit with them at lunch and I was like, “Umm…okay.” But deep

down inside I was jumping up and down and doing my Snoopy “happy dance.”

Then things got really strange. They said they had heard about my new $600

Juicy Couture designer cell phone and that everyone (meaning the rest of the

CCP crew) couldn’t wait to see it.

I was about to explain that I had said “juicy gossip on my new phone” NOT

“new gossip on my Juicy phone,” but I never got a chance because,

unfortunately, my telephone starting ringing. Very abnormally loudly. I was

trying my best to ignore it, but both of the CCP girls were staring at me like,

“Well, aren’t you going to answer it?!”

Obviously, I didn’t want to answer it because I had a really bad feeling they

were going to be a little disappointed when they actually saw my phone.

So I just stood there praying that it would stop ringing, but it didn’t. And pretty soon, everyone in the hallway was staring at me too.

Finally, I gave in, snatched open my locker, and answered the phone. Mainly to stop that AWFULringing.

I was like, “Hello?

Umm…sorry. Wrong number.”

And when I turned around, both of the CCP girls were running down the hall

screaming, “Make it go away! Make it go away!” I guessed it probably meant

they DIDN’T want me to sit with them at lunch anymore, which really sucked.

The most important lesson I learned last year was that having a CRUDDY

phone—or NONE at all—can totally RUIN your social life. While hordes of

celebrity party girls regularly FORGET to wear undies, not a single one would

be caught dead without her cell phone. Which was why I was nagging my mom

about buying me an iPhone.

I’ve tried saving up my own money to buy one, but it was impossible to do.

Mainly because I’m an artist and TOTALLY ADDICTED to drawing!

Like, if I don’t do it every day, I’ll go NUTZ!

I spend ALL of my cash on sketchbooks, pencils, pens, art camp, and other

stuff. Hey, I’m so BROKE, I have a milkshake on layaway at McDonald’s!

Anyway, when mom came home from the mall with a special back-to-school

present for me, I was pretty sure I knew what it was.

She rambled on and on about how my attending a new private school was

going to be a “stressful time of tremendous personal growth” and how my best

“coping mechanism” would be to “communicate” my “thoughts and feelings.”

I was absolutely

ECSTATIC

because you can communicate with a

NEW CELL PHONE!

Right?!🙂

I kind of zoned out on most of what my mom was saying because I was

DAYDREAMING about all of the cool ring tones, music, and movies I was

going to download. It was going to be LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!

But after my mom finally finished her little speech, she smiled really big,

hugged me, and handed me a BOOK.

I opened it and FRANTICALLY flipped through the pages, figuring that maybe

she had hidden my new cell phone inside.

It made perfect sense at the time because all the advertisements said it was the thinnest model on the market.

But slowly it dawned on me that my mom had NOT gotten me a cell phone, and my so-called present was just a stupid little book!☹

Talk about major HEARTBREAK!

Then I noticed that ALLthe pages of the book were BLANK.

I was like, OH. NO. SHE. DIDN’T!

My mom had given me two things: a DIARY and irrefutable evidence she IS, in fact,

CLINICALLYBRAIN DEAD!!

Absolutely no one writes their most intimate feelings and deep, dark secrets in a diary anymore! WHY?!

Because just one or two people knowing all your BIZ could completely ruin

your reputation.

You’re supposed to post this kind of juicy stuff online in your BLOG so

MILLIONS can read it!!!

Only a TOTALDORK would be caught WRITING in a DIARY!!

This is THE worst present I have ever received in my entire life! I wanted to

yell at the top of my lungs:

“Mom, I don’t need a STUPID book with 288 BLANK pages!!”

What I NEED is to be able to “communicate” my “thoughts and feelings” to my friends using my very own cell phone.

Wait! Silly me. I keep forgetting. I don’t have any friends. YET. But that could

change overnight, and I need to be prepared. With a shiny, new cell!

In the meantime, I will NOT write in this diary again.

_______________________________________

Hai.....

the story by Rachel Renée Russel

credit goes to: RACHEL RENÉE RUSSELL

the image used in this ....credit goes to the real owner

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MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 2

Okay. I know I said I’d never write in this diary again. I meant it at the time.

I’m definitely not the kind of girl who curls up with a diary and a box of

Godiva chocolates to write a bunch of really sappy stuff about my dreamy

boyfriend, my first kiss, or my overwhelming ANGST about the HORRIFIC discovery that I’m a PRINCESS of a small French-speaking principality and now worth MILLIONS.

THIS IS SO NOT-NOT ME!

MY LIFE TOTALLY SUCKS!!

All day I wandered around my new school like a zombie in lip gloss. Not asingle person bothered to say hi

...THIS IS ME!...

MOST OF THE TIME I

FEEL INVISIBLE!

How am I supposed to fit in at a snobby prep school like Westchester Country

Day?! This place has a Starbucks in the cafeteria!

I wish my dad had NEVER been awarded a bug extermination contract from

this school.

They can take their little pity scholarship and give it to someone who wants

and needs it, because I sure DON’T!

_______________________________________

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.....I really like to read stories.....

most favorite was Harry Potter and dork diaries...💜💜💜

if u wanted to read Harry Potter check in my profile ☺☺☺☺

if you want any stories plz comment..If i could write ....I will write it ok.......

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love you all........

😫😫😫😫 I wanted write more it isn't even 500 words I cannot update it😖😖😖😖😖😖😖

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I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you l love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you all 💜💜💜

at last I completed 500 words bye👋👋👋

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 3

It’s way past midnight, and I’m about to freak out because I still don’t have my

homework done. The assignment is for Honors English Lit and we’re reading A

Midsummer Night’s Dream by Shakespeare. I was kind of surprised, because I didn’t know he wrote teen chick lit.

It’s about a mischievous fairy named Puck, who tries to break up a really cute

couple lost in an enchanted forest.

Then, this guy with a donkey head crashes a big fairy party and hooks up with their queen. Pretty weird stuff!

Our homework assignment is to complete three essay questions about PUCK:

Would you consider Puck the protagonist of the play? Why or why not?

How do Puck’s personality and actions set the mood of the play?

Use your imagination and provide either a detailed physical description or a drawing of Puck.

The first two questions weren’t that hard, and I finished them in no time at all.However, the third question threw me for a loop.

I didn’t have the slightest idea what Puck looked like.

But I tried to imagine him with cute little pointy ears and AS HOT AS:

I was also dying to know if having a messed-up name like Puck had completely RUINED his life.

I bet the popular kids at his school called him “Puke,” “Schmuck,” “Yuck,” or

something worse.

POOR PUCK ☹!!

I tried to go to that educational website “Wiki-something-or-other” that

everyone plagiarizes to find a picture of Puck.

But I couldn’t remember the name of it and was too lazy to Google it.

I was really surprised to hear a knock on my bedroom door this late at night,

and I assumed it was my six-year-old sister, Brianna.

About a week ago, she lost one of her front teeth and buried it in the backyard

to see if it would grow. She is FOREVER doing crazy-weird stuff like that.

My mom says it’s because she’s still a little kid. But I personally think it’s

because she has the IQ of a box of crayons.

As a little joke, I told Brianna the tooth fairy collected teeth from children all

over the world and then Super Glued them together to make dentures for old

people.

I explained that she was in BIG TROUBLE with the tooth fairy, seeing as she had dug a hole and buried her tooth somewhere out in the backyard.

The funniest part was that Brianna TOTALLY believed me. She actually dug up half of Mom’s flower garden trying to find her tooth.

Since then Brianna has been paranoid that the tooth fairy is going to sneak into her room in the middle of the night and pull out ALLher teeth to make dentures.

But my prank kind of backfired, because now she absolutely REFUSES to use

the bathroom at night unless I first check to make sure the tooth fairy is not hiding behind the shower curtain or under the bath towels.

And if I’m not quick enough, Brianna will have a little “accident” right on my

bedroom carpet.

Unfortunately, I had to learn the hard way that (contrary to the TV commercial) Carpet Fresh DOES NOT remove all odors.

Lucky for me, it wasn’t Brianna at my door, but my parents.

Before I could say, “Come in,” they just kind of barged in like they always do,

which really irritated me, because this is supposed to be MY room! And as an

American citizen, I have a constitutional right to PRIVACY, which they keep

invading.

The next time my parents and Brianna come rollin’ up in here, I’m gonna

scream,

“Hey! Why don’t y’all just MOVE IN?!”

Anyway, my parents said they were surprised to see that I was still up doing

homework, and they wanted to know how things were going at school.

It was really strange, because just as I was about to answer, I had a total

meltdown right on the spot and burst into tears.

My parents were shocked and stared at me and then at each other.

Finally, Mom hugged me and said, “My poor little Boo-Boo!” which only made me feel WORSE.

Not fitting in at school was bad enough. But now I had to suffer the additional

humiliation of being the only fourteen-year-old still being called “little BooBoo”! Suddenly my dad’s face lit up.

“Hey, I’ve got a great idea! We know you’ve been under a lot of stress lately

with our move and your new school. I bet if we posted some positive

affirmations all around the house, it would help you adjust. You think?”

I was like, “Okay, Dad, THIS is what I think: It’s a STUPID idea! Like sticky

notes with corny sayings on them will solve my problem of being a TOTAL

LOSER at school. You wanna know what else I think? The article I read about

bug extermination chemicals killing off brain cells is probably true!”

But I just said it inside my head, so no one else heard it but me.

My parents kept staring at me, and it was starting to creep me out. Finally, after what seemed like forever, my mom smiled and said, “Honey, just remember,

we love you! And if you need us, we’re right down the hall.”

They walked back to their bedroom, and for several minutes, I could hear their

muffled voices. I guessed that they were probably discussing whether or not I

should be committed to a mental hospital right then or first thing in the morning.

Since it was so late, I decided to finish my Puck assignment during study hall.

I wonder if you still have to hand in homework when you’re locked up in a

PSYCHO WARD?

_______________________________________

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