CAITHLINE wakes up with screaming and sweaty "it was a nightmare " she says . The place she wakes up in is a rundown shack with rust and to her left her mother and brother is on a bed next to hers and her sister on her right .there's a fridge a small tv and 3 dressers and a small kitchen in a corner ,she gets up and gets ready for school ...she woke up without a smile and hatred for her life and existence...

she thinks " another bad is probably coming because i have the worst luck"

flashback

"it takes her back to the first memory she had of her father ...seeing him for the first time through a bulletproof glass in a prison wasn't what she wished for but she was happy even so . this man is her father but to her he feels like a total stranger he hugs and kisses her by the second meeting but she still can't call him dad ..."

even though she doesn't know him she longs for a father to protect and love her unconditionally

*a loud noise brings her out of her flashback as a tear rolls down her cheek*

the sadness inside her intenses and she pick herself up and goes about her day

the feeling of emptiness is so real to her

her loneliness creeps up on her at the same time she feels uneasy ...all her depression of all these years are boiling up by day she feels like everything is becoming too much to handle ...her life is filled with badluck and hurt how can such a beautiful soul be in so much pain . she always thinks "if there's a got he must be cruel for doing this to me what is my purpose in life"

she is always the one to help others but when she needs help people say she's weak

she goes to school in a daze she can't shake her nightmares ...thinking about the fact that all those things aren't just nightmaresbut her past and reality. As the morning starts she and her bestfriend and another girl is standing at the top of the stairs whilst she studies they the two other girls watch the boys play soccer ...

they start to giggle and speak about one guy and caithline wakes up out of her study session... they talked about a guy she never heard of or seen so she asked them who he is , they seemed more interested in why she was asking then telling her what she wants to know . The next day she decides to investigate more into him , she later sees that he checks all her boxes and tells her friends he'll be her boyfriend ...her bestfriend shocked by her words for someone tht never had a boyfriend before...

she said that although he checks all the boxes i need to get to know him first so i have real knowledge of him.

she is very intelligent and can pick up alot by just looking at someone or talking to them , she then approaches him by just a great's...he greats back with a smile and wave . First shot was made and she's happy with it but yet not enough is it , she looks at him more and his smile is captivating and his voice like a gentle melody in her ears ...

'she must have him now'

she messages him on social media and gets a response few minutes later ...she feel a bit excited and also scared. They exchange messages for a few days and get to know each other she becomes happier ...

They finally decide to meet up and talk in person ...she is nervous and happy

she has school that day but he doesn't so he comes to get her at school to walk her home a guy has never done that for her so she can't wait to see him ...

Never has she ever looked at the lock in her classroom with such a rush she is the first one out and normally she's the last student to leave the school ...she couldn't focus all day ...she runs to the school gates and there he is , she sees him before he she's her she calls out "jason" he looks and smiles waves at her ...she walks to him fast so people wouldn't see them walking together but its already late her bestfriend storms up and said to her "how much do i owe you"

both CAITHLINE and jason is confused...

her friends says" catty remember our deal that morning when we watched the soccer..."

...DEAL:::...

...*flashback to the first day she saw jason*...

...lee : " *if you manage to actually get him I'll owe you whatever you want or you'll earn the title of the smartest and most powerful girl i know"...

...caithline*: " sure why not ...i was planning on making him mine anyways "...

*back to present day*

caithline calmly replied saying that they'll discuss it after she has completed what she needed to do

her friend disappeared after hearing that and she and jason went on with walking they walked really long and as they got closer to her house she felt more and more ashamed of how she lives and how poor she is ... she asked him to not take her further but he protested against it but she convinced him other wish ...

they stopped at a corner close to her house and she said from now on this is our spot and where we'll meet or and greet ...

he smiled and said "okay but will i see you Saturday "

she was puzzled because she didn't know what he meant ...she asked him "Saturday?" and he explained that they were planning on chilling and she was invited to come if she wanted to and she said yes ...

as Saturday approaches she seems more anxious then exited because meeting friends is a really big step and it's been a month of just talking as friends and meeting up to talk and hang out alone but now they'll be around his friends what will he introduce her as ...why did he invite her of all people , does he like her as much as she likes him...

'she overthinks the next few days'

Saturday morning...

Saturday morning...

she wakes up smiling and it's clear that she really likes jason and she is excited to see him but at the same time she looks around house and sees how she lives and thinks he'll never love her so she will never show him or let him know how she lives

*notification on her phone *

" goodmorning are you still coming?"

she replies to jason and they decide on a time and place to meet up. She gets ready but shes too excited to eat anything so she goes to meet him..

she sees him and immediately she smiles and her heart beats faster and faster as she gets close to him he smiles and hugs her nd she melts in his caring and strong arms ...

they talk while they go to his friends house and they get there ...he suddenly stops looks at her and smiles and takes her hand nd they walk in ....

in all this shes flustered and nervous

his friends greet them both and they sit and music is playing while they play video games and everyone is talking and having a good time.She knows the words to the songs they playing because she listens to the same artist and rap music she knows that singing and rapping along with it will make them look at her and think wow because she knows that same taste in music is something people like.

she raps in the middle of the song "...I've been running through the streets all alone I'm on my own everybody call on me but i have no one to call on when everybody doubted me, no i ain't say nothing i just proved them wrong had to leave my friends because they were doing me wrong had to cut my family off because i don't know what they on...i guess thats why i don't trust nobodyi don't want to get high don't want to roll with nobody... i ain't go to college made it out the projects "

jasons friend Keanu looks at them both while they're whispering in each others ears and says loudly "so are the two of you dating or just way too close for friends?"

caythline smiles and think

*his answer will tell me how he feels*

jason looks at her smiles then looks at his friend and says " ofcourse we're dating "

caythline blushes and smiles while keanu congratulates them and she tells them more about her and they do the same ... she becomes comfortable she evem plays video games with them but even though she is losing they comfort her and help her .

it becomes dark and she remembers her mom said before six she needs to be home she tells jason she needs to go home they greet his friends and leave

jason asks her while they are halfway to her house "so what do you think of those dogs"

she is confused and asks him

"what dogs ...do you mean your friends?"

he says yes and they both laugh and she tells him about how much she enjoyed today and being around his friends and seeing him with his friends.

she stops him at there spot and smiles while looking at him and says while going on her tippy toes and kisses him " goodnight jason "

she turns and runs off he goes after her and hugs her and says nighy and goes on his way as she walks home she is so happy and cheerful...

she is singing and dancing and shes so upbeat.

she gets home and all the happiness disappears and becomes depression...her mom asks where she was and she lies because her mom is really strict and doesn't allow her to focus on anything but school even though her mom never helped her.

She doesn't answer and her mom rushes up to her and smacks her and says "I'll ask you one more time where were you?"

with tears in her eyes she says .

" my friend in my class i took her some of my books then i did my homework for the next week because she'll have my book all weekend "

her mom walks off and sits on a chair while smoking and watched tv ...

caythline then lays on her bed and cries silently into a void she can't bare to think of jason because her depression comes over her ....

she lays in bed for the rest of the weekend she doesn't eat nore does she sleep she just lays there nd screams into the void nd as her silent screams eats her up from the inside out she contemplates suicide even more .

her little slice of happiness or her other life with him is not enough to heal her broken soul.

without even realizing it she is slowly falling for him in a short while because his words are like honey tea to her sore throat ...his lips are like the drug she became unknowingly addicted to ...his eyes are a doorway to a better place where her heart can roam freely .

monday morning

time for school she gets up nd trys to pull herself together and not carry her sadness on her face but she gets to school and there he is she immediately forgets about her problems nd depression nd has a genuine smile on her face she hugs him so tight nd long it becomes awkward because in his arms she feels safe and loved ... she whispers to him "don't ever let me go" he smiles and they walk to the stairs to sit and talk before school starts ...he talks about the soccer game he watched the day before and then she starts to space out he asks if shes okay but she nods and smiles .

the school bell rings and everyone needs to go to there class while she was a mid junior he was a senior on school doing his last year nd she was doing her second year.

she thinks all day about his captivating smile that shines so bright it makes the sun , moon and all the stars turn jealous ...his beautiful thick eyebrows that is one of her favorite things about him she think about every part of him and dazed off ...

her teacher yells at her and she comes out her sir tells her that she's always focused and always answers questions .

he asks her for homework and she takes it out he says even tho she wasn't focusing today her homework for the next week and half is done and he is impressed but he scolds her and says to come talk to him after school nd she remembers she always walks with jason home and she asks if she can come at break time nd he says yes ...

she goes to her sir and he says that her grades are really high but it seems that its only high because she is pressured to do good and sometimes he can see her swollen eyes like she's been crying and how sometimes for glimpses of moments he sees such a lonely and sad look on her face like shes lost and forced as if she's been trapped and taken to another place .

she smile and says " sometimes i just get overwhelmed with always being the top student i can't do anything i really want or anything people my age do ...I'm expected to be perfect and help my family even tho i raised myself I've been my own rock I've been the one helping myself with everything because i basically raised myself and I've never needed help with school i even taught myself to read and write and I'm the one putting pressure on myself"

her is shocked nd excuses her she goes and sits somewhere reading a book but just as she open the book she begins to cry and she can't stop she hears someone approaching from behind amd she wipes her tears off fast nd sees it the girls that always bully her nd take her money and food...even tho she doesn't mind because she anyways doesn't eat anything or buy anything.