I woke up to the sound of my alarm at 5:30 in the morning. I didn’t get much sleep though because I was thinking about my first day at a new school. Especially since I found out I was gay only a year ago. I got out of bed, put on my favorite band T-Shirt and a pair of black ripped jeans. I went to the mirror in my room, put on some eyeliner, and messed with my hair a little. I stayed locked in my room until about 6:35 when my older brother Anthony started banging on my door yelling, ”You should already be at school dumbass it’s after 6:30!” he said angrily. He was drunk again. I hate it when he gets drunk. So I put on my black combat boots, headed, grabbed an apple, and my bookbag then left.

After a long walk, I finally got to school at 7:05 and went straight to the principal's office to get my schedule. My first class was Math, my WORST subject. I got to class and my teacher made me introduce myself. “ My name is Ronnie, I moved here from Arkansas, I'm 16 and live with my 19-year-old brother Anthony,” I said. But I couldn’t think straight, there was a really hot guy in the back of the class with crystal blue eyes. “ Ok well take that seat in the back.” the teacher said, as he pointed to the desk next to him. I took my seat and he introduced himself. “Hi, I'm Andy.” I didn’t know what to say, so I just said hi back. We then started working on a test. I was nervous of course. It was pretty confusing, but then I got the hang of it. After what felt like forever, the bell finally rang.

My next class was science. I walked in and saw Andy in the back of the class. My heart stopped for a minute. I sat down in front of him and laid my head down on the desk. I guess the teacher didn’t like kids “sleeping” in class and asked me to raise my head up. I heard Andy laugh from behind me\, “He can be a bit of an ***.” I laughed. School went on and I had all my classes with Andy. Like all schools\, there are always popular people. Andy is popular. He would never like me\, let alone be my friend. The thing that sucked the most was\, *sigh* He has a girlfriend. She was popular. While I was walking down the hallway\, heading to Geography\, I saw Andy with her\, he kissed and hugged her. Her name is Luna. She was really rude and self-centered.  I got to class and asked Andy about her. ”So was that your girlfriend?” I asked. “Yeah\,” he said with a sigh ”But I caught her cheating on me so I'm gonna break up with her.” “Oh\,” I said. But then he noticed the scars on my wrist and quickly changed the subject. I have forgotten my hoodie at home\, so I couldn’t cover them up. Andy asked me so many questions.”What made you want to do that” he asked with a worried look on his face\, “ My parents died a couple of years ago in a car crash\, life got hard without them\, at my old school people would always push me around and beat the living hell out of me\, I screamed and yelled\, begging them to stop\, they wouldn’t listen and no one else heard a sound.” I said trying not to cry. “I have some too.” he said as he lifted the sleeve on his jacket “ My dad was an alcoholic\, he would come home drunk and hit my mom and me\, I was a small child at the time\, then he overdosed when I was in 4th grade\, and then last year my mom got really sick\,”  he confessed\, looking down at the desk. I wanted to cry\, but I didn’t.

After school, I ran into him, literally, and he asked if I wanted to hang out for a while.  “Sure,” I said, “but I have to go home and make sure my brother is alright first” “What's wrong with your brother,” he asked looking confused. I shook my head and said, “Let’s not talk about that right now please.” I didn’t want to tell him that my brother was also an alcoholic, I don’t want to tell him anything about my brother. So we went to my place, a few minutes later I came out and locked the door. “Everything alright?” he asked. “Fine and dandy,” I said with a smile on my face. That was a lie, my brother was so drunk he couldn’t even stand up. He asked me who I was, I guess he couldn’t think straight, he never can, he is always drunk. Andy and I went to his place, he lived alone. “ I thought you had your mom,” I said out of confusion. When I said “mom” his face dropped and he looked like he wanted to cry “She died, not that long ago” he choked “she was diagnosed with astrocytomas cancer, I took care of her as much as I possibly could... but then one morning... she was just... dead,” he said with tears forming. “Oh, I’m sorry... I shouldn’t have asked.” I said, feeling bad for mentioning it. “It’s fine...” he said as he rubbed his eyes. After that, we started heading to the skate park. “Do you ride?” he asked I shook my head and told him the story about my older brother busting his head open when I was 5  “I've been scared to ride ever since then”

After a few weeks, Andy and I became best friends. He still doesn’t know I'm gay though, or that I like him. He had invited me to a party while we were studying but I didn’t want to go. ”I don’t do well with crowds.” I said with a frown on my face.” There won’t be a lot of people.” Andy said with great enthusiasm. ” Come on, it's gonna be fall break so you don’t have to worry about school” “ I don’t know,” I said. I’ve only been to one party and it didn’t end well, that was when I found out I was gay, I got really drunk and ended up in bed with another dude.”Think about it!” he said happily and went back to studying. I couldn’t study, I couldn’t concentrate or even think, because all I could think about was his beautiful blue eyes. We “studied” for a few hours then I went home. When I got home my brother was drunk and angry. ”Where the hell has you been!?” he shouted “With a friend,” I said “Don’t get smart with me dumbass!” he shouted as he threw a glass bottle at me so I lifted my arm to shield my face. I felt a sharp pain in my hand and looked down to see blood all over it so I ran upstairs, locked myself in my room, and started crying. I was scared. I grabbed my phone with one hand and texted Andy.

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Ronnie 😘 - hey could you come over I'm scared...

Andy  💕    - sure what's wrong?😕😦

Ronnie😘 - my brother is really drunk...

Ronnie😘 - he threw a bottle at me and it cut my hand...

Andy 💕     - ok hold on I’ll be there in 5 minutes

Ronnie😘 - ok sneak in through my bedroom window... I don't want him to see you and try and hurt you too...

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  After about five minutes I heard Andy knocking on my window so I let him in.”Hey, are you ok?” he asked, he sounded really worried“ No, I can't move my hand and it won't stop bleeding!” I said with tears running down my face as I held my hand to my chest. I was so scared, I was shaking.”It’s gonna be ok” he said as he reached for my other hand. “Where’s the first aid kit?” he asked, ”In the bathroom behind the mirror,” I replied. He left the room and came back a few seconds later with the first aid kit in his hand. He grabbed my hand, cleaned the cut, and put a bandage on it. “Your shirt is covered in blood. Here let me help you take it off and I'll wash it at my place,” he said as he reached for the bottom of my shirt. I nodded and lifted my arms up as he slowly eased it up over my head. “Where do you keep your shirts at?” he asked and I managed to say “top drawer” so he walked over to my dresser and got a plain black shirt out and helped me put it on. Then he looked me in the eyes, wrapped his arms around me and said, ”Everything's gonna be okay.” I couldn’t help myself from wrapping my arms around him and crying. We stayed like that for what felt like hours.

The next day all I could think about was that hug. After school I went to his place to “study” but all I could think about was last night. “Is your hand alright?” he asked. “Yeah, it’s getting better, thanks again for the help,” I said. “No problem, anything for you,” Andy said back with a smile, I blushed but tried to hide it. “Why didn’t you tell me your brother was an alcoholic?” he asked, I looked down at my book and replied with “I didn't want you to worry about me… im sorry…” “It's ok, I'm not mad but no matter what I am gonna worry about you, you're my best friend,” he said and I just nodded.”Oh! I almost forgot about your shirt!” he said as he got up and ran out the door, he came back in a few seconds later and threw my shirt at me. “How did you get the stains out?” I asked and he said it was a secret. We studied for about an hour then he stood up off the bed “Hey do you want anything to eat?” he asked “No thanks, I’m not hungry” I actually like never eat, I guess you could say I’m a little anorexic. “Okay well imma go get some food, are you sure you don’t want anything?” he asked again “Yeah I’m sure, thanks though,” I said with a smile as he left the room. He came back with what looked like pizza and an apple. He threw the apple at me, “Here you need to eat something, I know you don’t eat much and it worries me” I looked down at the apple then back at him “Thanks” I said half smiling. I took a bite out of the apple and continued to study

The next day was the day of the party, I was a bit nervous because I don’t know what to expect. “Hey, how many people are gonna be there again?” I asked Andy “Only like twenty I think?” he said as if that was a small amount. “Twenty?!” I said in surprise “Is that too many people? If so we can just go to my place and hang out.” he said a little worried “No, no it's fine I was just a little surprised that's all” I said forcing an awkward smile. He grabbed my hand and looked at me “Look, Ronnie, if you don’t want to go it's okay, I understand you are not very social, so we can find something else to do.” I blushed but I tried to hide it “No really, it’s fine,” I said letting out a slight giggle

*later that night*

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Andy 💕    - You ready? 😄😎

Ronnie😘- Ya I think so… idk if I'm wearing the right thing or not tho…

Andy💕     - Send me a pic of your outfit lol

Ronnie😘-*insert image here* Is this good???😊

Andy💕     - Perfect lol😎

Andy💕     - I’ll be there in about 15 minutes

Ronnie😘- Ok lol see ya

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When Andy got here I opened the door and he hugged me “What is this for?” I said in confusion “For going to this thing with me, I know you didn’t really want to come.” I just smiled and hugged him back. He pulled back and asked if I was ready to go “Yeah, lead the way!” I said, So then we just walked. When we got there the house was huge. “Are you sure it’s only twenty people?” I said a little worried “Yeah, that’s what Tyler said.” he said putting his hand on my shoulder.  “Trust me everything is going to be fine.” I couldn’t help but smile. We walked in and he led me to the bar “So what's your poison?” he asked, “I’m sorry what?” I said really confused.  “You know, like what do you drink?” he laughed “Oh, just a beer I guess,” he ordered me a beer and him some weird mix drink.  After a few drinks he started to get a little tipsy “Hey are you ok, I think you’ve had enough to drink.” I said a little worried “Nah man I’m good.” he said and it just made me worry even more.

He continued to drink even though I tried to stop him several times, he was really drunk and it was almost midnight so I walked us to my house. “ Now sit down on the bed and ill go get you some water.”   said “Noooooooo sit with meeeeeeee!” he said in an annoyed voice so I sat next to him.   He put his hand on my leg “ You know you have really pretty eyes?” I said to him, Even though he was drunk I managed to make him blush. I smiled like crazy because he was blushing and saying sweet things to me. “Hey come closer,” he said. So of course, I did. Being me and all I fell right into the trap without even knowing it was coming. When I came in closer he pulled me into a tight embrace and whispered, “Your an amazing person I’m glad that you are here.” I blushed so hard I didn't know what to do. Was I supposed to hug him back or not? I couldn't make up my mind so I did what felt natural and hugged him back. He pulled away and laid down on the bed.” Lay down next to me Ronnie pleeeeeease.” he wept. So, of course, blushing like crazy I did. I laid down on the bed next to him and I didn’t know what to do or say. When I looked at Andy in his beautiful eyes he gave me a smirk and pulled me close. Then when I realized what was happening he was kissing me. So I pulled him closer to me and kissed him back with more passion, hoping he would do the same. He pulled me on top of him without breaking the kiss. I came back to my senses and realized that this was very bad. I pulled off him breaking the kiss. He looked so confused as to why I did that but I had to or this would have gone way too far...for now at least. “What’s wrong?” he asked looking very confused. “Your drunk Andy, you won't remember any of this in the morning,” I said sitting up on the bed. He laid his head slightly on my chest and I wrapped my arms around him and he snuggled to me. I kissed his forehead as he slowly drifted off to sleep “Goodnight Andy.” I said softly,” Goodnight Ronnie,” he said in a half-asleep whimper.

When I woke up late this morning he was gone, I walked around the house he wasn’t there!  I went back to my room and laid down thinking he wasn’t coming back then I heard a knock on my door “Hey Ronnie I brought food and coffee, I hope you like ba-” I cut him off mid-sentence with a kiss. To my surprise he kissed me back with passion, then he pulled away “what was that for?” he asked a little shocked,” I missed you '' I answered wrapping my arms around him. He put the coffee and food down, then looked at me and kissed me being slightly aggressive. I grabbed the back of his neck pulling him closer, as we made out we fell over to the bed. But then I pulled him off and said “ let’s wait till tonight” he looked at me with a frown “Awe why?” he asked so I explained to him how my brother doesn't know I'm gay yet and I didn't want him catching us “Oh ok I understand,” he said before kissing me, so I pulled him closer enjoying every moment of it. “ Oh my god I forgot about the food!” he said jumping up off the bed. He grabbed the food and coffee plopping back on the bed “You want one? He asked as he handed me a cup of ice coffee “half of one I guess, I don’t really eat much so.” I said hoping he wouldn't ask why “Ok.” he sighed “but I think you should really start eating more,” he said ripping a bagel in half, I just looked into his eyes then he kissed me “Now eat!” he demanded with an adorable little smile.

We hung out for a few hours, then he had to leave to pay some bills. Later that night he came back, I was already laying in bed not thinking he would be back. As I sat up he walked over, sat on my lap, and started kissing me intensely, I kissed back still letting him take full control. He pushed me down on the bed and started kissing down my neck slightly biting as he goes. He kissed my shoulder then pulled my arm up to his lips kissing every single one of my scars, as I lay there letting him take control I couldn’t help but wonder how long he has wanted to do this. He pulled me up and I took off my shirt, he kissed me as he took off his jacket then pulled away “Are you sure this is what you want?” he asked, “Yes Andy, I'm certain.” I said blushing a little “Ok” he kissed my forehead “ If I hurt you let me know” I just nodded, he started kissing down my body from there, then I pulled his shirt off his body starting at his abs. He smiles staring into my eyes.

I woke up this morning still remembering what happened last night.  I couldn't believe that actually happened, I looked over and he was still asleep, I tried getting out of bed without waking him, as I was getting up he sat up and asked: “ Where are you going, babe?” “Just to get something for breakfast,” I said blushing at what he called me. As I walked out the door I saw him lay back down and that's when I realized he wasn't going anywhere. I walked to the kitchen and fixed some eggs and bacon,  when I was done I walked back to my room, sat on my bed and handed Andy the food before I started getting dressed “What are you doing?” he asked as he took a bite of bacon “my brother will be awake soon, you should probably get dressed to.” I said not wanting either one of us to get dressed, I just wanted to lay in bed all day next to him. “Ok,” he said then he got up and put on his jeans. He sat back down and continued eating then looked up at me “Are you not gonna eat?” he asked, “No I’m not really hungry.” I said, “Babe you really need to eat, I don’t want you starving yourself because you could die and I don’t want that to happen.” “I know… I’m just not hungry… I’ll eat later I promise.” I said hoping he wouldn't worry anymore. After a while we went to go see a movie he wanted to surprise me so I was blindfolded until it started, once he took the blindfold off I saw a woman from my favorite movie, fifty shades of gray but the movie that was on was fifty shades darker. “I'm so happy right now I could kiss you,” I said. “Then why don’t you?” Andy asked leaning towards me for a kiss “Well then I guess I will” I responded with a smile as our lips met. So we kissed I wished it could last forever but some random person yelled “GAY PDA” at us. I wonder if they just said that because they are lonely or jealous. Could there be another reason behind people hating PDA when it comes to minors? Eh whatever its nothing to get stressed over. After a while of awkward silence, he finally said, ”Babe you really know how to make me want you more.” “uhhhhhh thanks,” I said in return while blushing so hard. I mean my whole face was bright pinkish-red. After a while, we left to go to my place. He put on one of his favorite songs. “Hey if you don’t like the music I’m playing just tell me I’ll change it,” Andy commented to me seeing that I was dozing off. “Wait where are we going I thought that we were going to my place,” I said hastily as he drove down a dirt road. “You’ll see,” he said with a smirk on his face.

We went from an empty barren type of land to a forest. We kept going deeper and deeper until he just stopped. “Ok and now we walk the rest of the way,” he said. I was kinda getting nervous about what was going on. I followed him anyway because I trust him. That still doesn't mean I don't feel a bit uneasy about all of this. All of sudden he disappears behind a tree and I couldn't help but get worried about him. “Andy” I yell out scared to lose him forever or let him get hurt. There was no reply. Then I started to freak out even more “ANDY COME OUT THIS ISN’T FUNNY WHERE ARE YOU” I was starting to have a panic attack. I start wondering around trying to find him. The next thing I know is that there is no light but I didn't pass out a bag that was put over my head. This was the end I kept thinking over and over again. Then my clothes were being taken off and then I knew I was about to be raped. There is something strange about this though. I couldn’t help to notice but whoever was undressing me wasn't tearing apart my clothes or yanking them off but was just trying to turn me on. “Andy?” I asked under my breath hoping it was him. All I got in reply was “shhh”. I feel like I was gonna pass out because of my anxiety. When I started to sway a little I felt the hands steady me and I knew at that instant that it was Andy. When he finally undressed me all the way he took the bag on my head off. And I got turned on so fast seeing what I saw. He was in nothing but had a harness in his hand and he was holding it in front of me. “I know you want to put it on,” he said with a devilish smile. I bite my lip and nod then he puts it on me.

When I woke up the next morning I was still cuddling next to him. I got up and got dressed then walked out only to see trees “What the hell?”  said in confusion as the events from last night came rushing back to me. My feelings were all mixed up and I had no clue what to say or do. Then Andy hugged me from behind. I kinda jumped when I felt his arm slither around me. “How do you feel hmmm,” he said. At that moment I didn’t know whether to scream at him or kiss him or I don’t know. I was all over the place with my thoughts. “Ah I see you don’t know how to feel about what I did last night” he commented. “Eek,” I screeched as he slid his hand down somewhere I didn't expect at that moment. I pulled his hand out and said “babe what we did was really fun but let's not make this just a sexual relationship ok?” he just smiled at me for a second “okay.” he said as he kissed my forehead. After that, all I could think was “phew I don’t have to worry about that right now”.