Rachel

What's the best way to forgo everyone and everything that hurts you, for me it is to get drunk.

I don’t normally like to drink alcohol because it makes me lose my mind, and I don’t like the fact that something has this kinda affect. If anything I like the most is being sober. So I don’t make any rash decisions that I might regret in the future.

But today it's different, for just one day I want to be free, not caring about anything else in life. I don’t know what the morning brings for me but I wanna enjoy being out of control for once.

“What do you think you’re doing here?” I sensed a hand on my shoulder as the glass was taken away from my hand.

I groaned loudly, trying to grab the glass back, “Give it back, you’re no one but my boss, why do you care.”

He stood right in front of me, shooting deadly glares at me, as he placed both his arms around my waist, lifting me from the stool that I was sitting on.

I slapped his face trying to free myself from his grasp but he didn’t even flinch a bit and carried me out of the bar and into his car.

“Fight all you want, but you’re allowed to drink more.”

“Let me go, or I’ll shout,” I said, trying to open the door, but it was locked.

“Sit quietly, I’m taking you home.” he replied, as he buckled my seatbelt.

Our gaze met as his finger touched the bare skin of my hip, “Why?”

“Because you’re my employee,” he said, separating himself from me.

“I’m resigning,” I turned my gaze away from him, turning my head to the window.

“You’re not allowed to,”

“I’m not allowed to resign and you’re allowed to cheat on me,” Shit what did I say, the alcohol is making me lose my mind.

He parked the car on the side of the road, turning his head to me. “We’re not in a relationship,”

“But we do have something,”

“We do, but that doesn’t mean we’re committed to each other,”

“Yeah, we just **** buddies,” I said removing my seatbelt.

“Don’t…,” Jayce said, holding my wrist. “You ever say that word; you don’t know how precious you’re to me.”

“How precious,” I replied, filling every mere inch in between our bodies, staring right into his eyes.

“Rachel..,” He said, letting go of my wrist, moving away from me.

I took the car key and threw it somewhere in the backseat.

“What do you think you did to throw the key?”  His voice seems calm but the annoyance in his face says otherwise.

“You can’t leave, until you answer,”

“Rachel,”

“What, you’re angry now, or you’re so desperate to be with her like last time,”

Jayce put both his hand on my shoulder, shaking my body lightly, “Don’t act like you care,”

I sighed, as I was finally coming to my senses, “You’re right,” I said, holding the keys that I acted to throw away, unlocking the door, and left before he could stop me.

Without caring to glance back at Jayce I moved forward. I blame the alcohol for making me act so stupid, I should have known that this arrangement was nothing but bad idea. All my life I fought to escape the same fate as my mother, but in the end I'm not different from her. I allowed my emotions to rule over my mind and look, what happened.

“I hate myself, I hate myself for falling in love, I hate letting my emotions rule my mind, I hate….,” I mumbled walking away from  Jayce but lost my balance, getting ready to fall on my ***.

But the fall never came. What came was a gentle landing on a firm set of arms, with a very familiar pair of eyes staring at me, with his around my waist, leaning over my face as a pair of soft tender lips kissed me.

The kiss came as a surprise at first, but I leaned into his touch yet again, allowing my emotions to rule over my mind, wrapping my arms around his neck and deepening the kiss. The kiss lasted long, with no one of us wanting to stop  but at last our lips separated from each other's grasp, but the hand holding me remained the same.

My hands subconsciously his cheeks, the little stubble on it tickles as I gently smooth my hand on his cheeks. “I hate you,” I said, even though my actions don't justify my words.

“I know it's a lie,” He said, carrying me to the car.

“Where are you taking me?” I said, borrowing my head in his chest, with my senses enjoying the warmth and fragrance of his body so close to mine.

“Home, you’re too drunk to be left alone,” He said, easily unlocking the door even with me in his arms. “We’ll clear all misunderstandings in the morning, when you’re sober.” He buckled my seatbelt. Placing a gentle peck on my lips, before closing the door.

******

Jayce

There hasn’t been a time that I’ve ever been attached to a woman other than my mother and sister. My thoughts about relationships are very clear; I don’t want commitment and complication in my life. But today, after seeing Rachel all sad, drinking alone in a bar made me angry. I always wanted to protect her even though she was an employee. But, when she is all drunk, vulnerable. alone like this, this doesn’t seem to be possible.

It doesn't change the fact that I hate to commit. But I don’t know what happens to me when I’m with Rachel. I can’t see her with anyone but me, and that’s one of reasons why I crossed my limits and did something I should have never done. 

I slept with her and looked at what happened at last. I should've known that Rachel is not the come and go type of girl; she wants commitment even if she never accepts the fact herself.

I sighed, turning to look at the drunken beauty sleeping beside me in the car.

I don’t know how much she’ll remember about anything that happened tonight, but what I know is that if Rachel wants commitment then I'm allowing myself to let all my fears fade and see where this relationship takes both of us.

I’m a selfish guy and I can’t see my girl with anyone but myself.

I chuckle and turn my head, hearing Rachel mumble in her sleep. “I hate you,”

Life is never sad and boring when I’m beside her, she fills color in my black and white world.

“I know you don’t,” I mumbled close to her ear, removing a few strands of her hair away from face. Carrying her in my arms, and inside my house.

Tomorrow when she wakes up, I want to start a new chapter with her in my life. But tonight I want her to sleep in my arms with her head close to my heart.

“Tomorrow, I’ll tell you how special you are to me,” I said gently, pecking her lip, embracing her petite frame close to my warmth. 

Rachel



“Ahhh,” I groaned, adjusting my eyes to the light.

God, my head hurts so badly.

I massaged my temples with my hand, hoping to get some relief, and turned my head to the side of the bed, only to come face to face with Jayce.

Wait, now I remember I was drunk yesterday, and had a fight with Jayce. After that, he carried me in his car. Then, what happened next I don’t remember, and how I ended up coming into Jayce's house and in his bed.

I checked my clothes quickly, but nothing seemed unusual. I'm still wearing the same clothes that I wore yesterday. Jayce seems to wear pjs and a t-shirt, which actually seems odd. He is a ***** sleeper and doesn't like clothes in bed.

So, nothing happened last night, so why am I here? Wait, I confessed my feelings while drunk to Jayce.

Shit, Shit, shit…..what’ve I done? I don’t want a relationship. Commitments make things worse, and who knows that better than me?

I have seen my mother, who was not once happy with my dad, and I’ve faced it myself too in the past.

Shit drunk Rachel, you made quite a mess for sane Rachel.

Good thing Jayce is still asleep, maybe if I’m lucky, I can sneak out and never look back.

Yeah, I can go to my old house, no one here knows the old address and no one can find me there, not even Jayce.

Move Rachel, I signed, staring  last glance at the sleeping and handsome face of Jayce.

This is the last time I can see him. I don’t want that image of him to ever fade from my mind.

“I’m sorry,” I said, silently leaving everything that I had in the past, like a coward.

This is good for both of us. We never wanted anything serious, but I let my feelings rule over my mind and disappointed both of us. Only if I leave can we both be happy, living our lives, like nothing happens.

I know Jayce doesn't consider me someone more than an employee, and just because we share the bed doesn’t mean that we both can share each other's heart.

 *******

  Jayce

I smiled at myself even if half asleep, but I’m happy because I know after today things will only get better and change for the better.

I moved to the side of my bed, scanning the space that seemed cold beneath my touch. With my senses on alert, I opened my eyes, looking at the space where Rachel was sleeping last night, but now she is nowhere to be found.

Jumping out of bed, I took rapid steps, scanning every inch of my house hoping to somehow find Rachel, but no matter how much I tried she was nowhere near my sight.

I signed, sitting on the edge of bed with my hands on my head. “Why?” I groaned, wanting to form the stress and the anger beneath my heart in words. But I can't, it's no use not right now. I then grabbed my phone, calling Rachel again and again, but the phone was switched off.

I paced around my house, blaming myself again and again if only I wasn’t a fool. To accept the feeling in the heart, things would be better. Maybe I’m too late.

Shut up, I shouted, grabbing my car keys and phone without even caring to change my clothes. I made my way to Rachel’s apartment. I needed to be quick. I said driving the fastest and safest as legal I can.

Rachel, don't you dare to leave me, when I’ve built enough courage to accept my feelings for you.

I quickly parked my car in front of the apartment building. Running to the door, only to be disappointed with it being locked.

Rachel, why are you hiding? I paced around her front door, nearly losing my mind, finding no way to contact Rachel.

Shit...I punched the wall closest to me, thinking of finding some comfort from my anxiety, but nothing helped, it only hurts me this time physically too.

I scanned my knuckle that was now bruised, throbbing badly, but at least it helped distract me even for a bit.

‘Rachel,’ I sighed her name, playing with the bracelet on my wrist. It was a gift from Rachel, and in many ways it was just a replica of her personality, sweet and quirky and yet mysterious in some way. And for now, this is the only thing close to me that reminds me of her other than the memories I created with her. I touched the bracelet once more, promising one thing, that I’ll find Rachel one day, and that day I would confess everything that is unknown, even the closet in my life to her, and even after that, her feelings for me remain unchanged. I’ll leave her and never look back, living my life as before, alone, dedicated to my work. Because I can’t dream of falling for anyone but her in this lifetime.

Until then, my quest to find my mysterious Rachel starts now.

Author note - Creation is hard, So if you like the story. Cheer me up! By Liking the Story. or Add it to your library！Have some idea about my story, share it I will gladly accept and comment down your thoughts about the story so far. Thank you love from your dear Author.

Rachel



“Rachel, do you think daddy loves Jane,” Marline asks, scanning pictures of Brandon and Jane and placing them beside each other.

“You know you’re smarter than any kid your age,” I said, sitting beside her as Marline smiled at my words. “And yeah, I think your daddy loves Jane, and you know a secret..,”

“What secret..,” Marlin said, suddenly excited by my words.

“Well, I don’t know for sure… but I think Jane loves Brandon too, in one way or another.”

“Really, Marlin jumped in excitement at my words.

“Hey, but don’t say that to your daddy or Jane, it's our little secret.”

“What secret…...”

We both turned our faces to see Jane standing in the doorway, with five month old Liam, and loading shopping bags in her arms.

“Jane,” I quickly took long steps to the doorway, helping Jane with bags of groceries. “How many times do I have to tell you, call me, when you need? '' I scolded Jane, only to make her smile and baby Liam giggle.

“So cute,” I said, watching Liam yawing in his mother's arms. “Watching you makes me wanna have a baby, but then I change my mind, seeing all the hard work you and Brandon have to put into raising these two devils.”

“I hate you, Rachel,” Marlin said, from behind me, crossing her arms around her chest.

“No you don’t,” I said, tickling her, making her laugh. “See you love me,”

“Can I play with Liam,” Marline asked after a while, as Jane relaxed her frame on the couch with Marlin sitting beside her, watching her. “Sure baby, but Liam, as you can see, Liam is asleep now,” Marline looked upset at Jane's words but then smiled. “Then can you tell me a story,” Jane nodded.

I sat on the couch watching the three of them snuggling on the couch having a warm, cozy family time with each other. It's comforting to see how, even without being connected to each other with blood, they find comfort and love in each other's company.

I sometimes find myself an outsider watching them interact, but I’m happy to find such good people to work for, but I can’t lie that I miss my past life, my old place, people from my past, mostly Jayce. It's been a year, but yet I couldn’t forgo my feelings for him. I just hope that he is happy and maybe moves on with his life, and maybe get married and have kids that are as sweet as Marline and Liam. Even if he is not with me, I wish him all happiness in life and in the future. I wish that I could say the same for myself.

“Hey guys,” I turned my head watching Brandon inside, washing his hands, before sitting beside Jane, “How is my big boy,” Brandon smiled, cuddling Liam in his arms.

God, they look so cute with Jane snuggling with Marline and Brandon with Liam and with them playing and snuggling with each other's kids. This image is so cute that I’m so jealous.

I picked up my phone and clicked a few pictures, not letting this perfect moment go uncaptured, “So cute..,” my words got louder than I accepted and both Jane and Brandon turned their heads at me, “Rachel,”

I smiled, trying to act innocent, “What… don’t worry, I’ll send you both a copy, for now bye..,” I said, grabbing my bag and running.

“Rachel,” I smiled, hearing them shouting my name again and laughing later together. They deserve all the happiness in life.

Small and simple moments and time with family are something that I would die for, but I don’t think I deserve any of them. For now, I have to go to work or I’m going to be late.

 *******

Jayce

“So what do you think about the new recipe,” One of my chef questions, distracting my thoughts.

“It's bland, no flavor,” I slid the plate away from me. “But, this time I tried my best..,”

“Yeah, like last time and the time before that,” I stood by my table, wanting to get far away from the person that doesn’t even know how to cook a simple dish.

“But…,” He complained.

“You know what you’re fired for, just pack and leave.”

“What…but…,” He continued as I left the room without caring about his complaints. If a person doesn't know how to cook this simple dish, I don’t know how he’ll manage to cook dishes that are far more complicated and precise than this.

God, I need some fresh air and maybe liquor.

At times like this, I miss Rachel even more than I wanted to. She was the best, and even without any professional experience and background in food. The flavor profile of her dishes, the aroma, the way she presented each and every creation of hers with so much attention and detail. I miss her cooking more than I want to accept it.

Even with years of work and learning, I can’t compare with Rachel.

It's almost been a year and yet I couldn’t find a clue about where she is, and what makes my search harder is Rachel being a loner and secretive person, in many ways she is like me.

Except for the fact that she is loud and quirky, which is quite the opposite of what I’m, but staying away from her made me realize one thing that I haven’t realized working with her for years. That her smile and attitude is just a mask that she puts on to hide the true feeling in her heart. Her smile is nothing but a shield that she uses to protect herself from suffering, but that day, with alcohol in her system, she was finally able to show the pain, the thoughts, the feelings she had been hiding for years, and that was the last day she did that, because after that night she disappears like mist in air leaving no clue behind whatsoever.

I sighed, shaking my head, forgoing thoughts of Rachel. I don’t want to think of her not now. It's been a year and I’m trying my best to find her and ways to contact her. But I’m angry too, anger not only because she left me alone while I was asleep, but not for once did she think of contacting me, or clearing any misunderstanding, before she ended anything between us.

I know that we were not lovers, not boyfriend or girlfriend, but we still were something, at least for the sake of our work relationship. She could talk to me for once, before ending everything and leaving with so many unanswered questions behind.