You and Tarhyung were best friends. Your friendship with him doesn't start off like those cliche movies, being best friend since childhood or meeting him at a simple college party. In fact, your friendship with him was unique. You were one of his long-time fan, adoring him from afar when one day, he stopped by the coffee shop you worked at on the way to practice. Long story short, after he saw you solving a Rubik cube while waiting for his americano, he asked if you could teach him how solve it so he can brags about it to his band mates. You were speechless as first, introducing yourself with trembling fingers and told him you were his fan. Not the weird creepy ones though but just a fan who likes to watch his performance on TV or listens to his newly awaited comeback. He was super happy when he heard that, and that's where you two took it off. Now it has been a few years since that day, and everyday, Taehyung never fails to mesmerize you. He was pretty good at everything. He's young, he had the looks and of course, he's popular as hell. With BTS claiming more and more award both nationally and internationally, his fame and success became the talk of everyone every single day. You were blessed and lucky, even just by being his best friend.

He greeted you cheerfully one day, when you were invited to his dorm where he and his band mates lives. They had just returned from an oversea tour, and it's been a few months since you last saw him. He hugged you tight and you know you can't control the beating in your heart if he kept you in his embrace longer.

These kind of interaction was normal between you two, as you knew Taehyung only sees you as his girl best friend and nothing more. You knew, you knew you were nothing special compared to her. Park Do-ah. Taehyung’s dream girl. The most popular and ethereal looking singer and actress of all time. She is so pure and timid and graceful and everything... everything that you're NOT. That's why.. staying friends with Taehyung was more than enough for you. You knew how much he adores her and even if you confesses your feelings, it might just jeopardize your friendship with him. Of course it hurts. You had been good at controlling your feelings for him, but some day, some time when he talks about how he wish she was his, you couldn't help but cry when the day was over and he went home after venting his heart on you. Just like any other normal girl in this world, you're in for it. You know you had fallen dangerously in love with Kim Taehyung. And though his band mates likes to tease the two of you, Taehyung will always shush them down by saying, "We're just friends. Don't make it uncomfortable for Y/N!" That day when he says that, was the day that was so clear to you, that you should never told your feelings about it since you knew, it will ruin your pure friendship with him. But one day, that change. All because of his dream girl who is dating his band mate, Kim Namjoon.

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The moment those words came out of her mouth, Taehyung could feel his own heart cracking. He felt as if a venomous pain rise in the pit of his heart. The venom was achingly spreading through it, and he can do nothing but stop it. Taehyung stared at Do-ah under his dark almond shape eyes.

She knows he had spend thousand of dollars for this night. The candle light dinner on a rooftop of an elite building. A private helicopter that brings her everywhere around Seoul. The Cartier necklace he purchased for her. She could sense that it was for his confession. Do-Ah was a singer as well and she knew, for the longest time, that Taehyung had always said on every interview he had been on that she was his ideal type. But she though all that was long ago. She knew him as her fan, her junior in the music industry. Sure, a lot of other celebrity mentioned that they were her fans as well, but Taehyung, he was on another level. International level. But despite all that, despite her being close to him and his band mates, doesn't mean she feel the same way about him.

Taehyung’s almond eyes blink rapidly when she told him that. So all those months recording songs with her was just her being professional? Is that what she's trying to say? Then why did she caress his hair every time she left the studio? Why did she wipe his sweat with a towel when she visits them during practice? Why did she came by and praise ONLY him for his hard works?

That four word was enough to make Taehyung feel betrayed. Of all the people, in all the world. Why? Why must it be his hyung? And why must he do this to him, knowing he's in love with Do-Ah for the longest time?

Taehyung utters sadly, his eyes were full of tears by now. He avoid her gaze and turn around, leaving the rooftop with a heavy cloud on his head. That day, Taehyung felt as if his whole world collapse.

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A knock on your apartment wake you up. It was 3 AM. Who the hell could be knocking on your door at times like this? You didn't answer, instead you sleepily made your way and to the door, where you found a drunk looking Taehyung lean against your door. His heavy body weakly limp on yours. You were lucky you were strong enough in your sleepy state to not fall to the hard floor.

His voice was so weak, as if he had been in battle but you can hear every word. You pull him to the couch and put him down, sitting beside him sadly. You cupped his cheeks with your small hand, finding how heart-breaking his state is right now. Taehyung’s face was red from the booze, his jet black hair and tie messy. Though his almond eyes that you adore so much were closed, you can see the traces of wet tears on his reddish cheek, probably crying his heart out after being rejected by his dream girl. You knew about today. He told you and planned the day with you for months. You know it's not your place to be jealous, Taehyung loved Do-ah even before he was famous and even before he was friends with you. But your heart ached the day he first told you about it. He says he can date freely now, and he was finally going to ask his dream girl out. You cry to yourself that night, stupidly hoping that it was you he was planning the date for but you know, it was just a wishful dream. Though you're still with him, he only thinks about her. Only wanted her. You cry every time you got home after pretending to be happy and spend the day with him planning the date. You cry every time you think about how lucky Do-ah is to be loved by him. You cried harder when you think about how they would spend the night under the sheets with each other when she accepts his confession. It was just hard on you alone. But this.. what is this? What happen to them? You don't understand, what had gone wrong?

You were shocked. Too shocked. You understand why Taehyung was crying so much that time, because he was hurt and betrayed by the two people he loves most. It's like Arthur, Guinevere and Lancelot all over again.Do-ah.. she's in a relationship with Namjoon? But, but didn't Namjoon knew that Taehyung had always had a crush on her? And Do-ah.. how could she date Namjoon of all people?

He looks pathetic, but this look on him made your heart uneasy. You loved Taehyung with your whole heart. Him being betrayed like this must have hurt him beyond repair. You hug him tight, caressing his hair while altogether crying with him.

That night, Taehyung cried himself to sleep in his drunken state. Slowly, you reach for his cheek when he fell asleep on your chest, wiping his tears. Your heart aches a lot when you see him like this, and you promise, as his friend and for the love your harbored for him, you'll be there to pick up the pieces Do-ah left behind.

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Namjoon and Taehyung's friendship change after that. What had been a brotherly love between the two, a dongsaeng loving his hyung and adoring his work so much, turn into something salty when Namjoon talked it out with Taehyung. Everybody in the band decide not to interfere because they knew it was something personal. Even the management didn't interfere and when they ask Namjoon if he wanted to make his relationship with Do-Ah public, he told them not yet. He had discussed things with Do-Ah after spending time at her place and Do-Ah told them its safer for both of their career, especially with Namjoon going to America for his mixtape soon and her doing concert tours around South Korea for the next few months. The boys were the most troubled ones regarding this news. They didn't choose sides, but they knew how much Taehyung loves Do-Ah and Namjoon becoming her boyfriend was out of the blue. One day, after one of their recording session with Namjoon, Taehyung was asked to stay. He wanted to leave so much, but Yoongi was so adamant for the two of them to talk it out. So Taehyung have no choice but to drop his bag to the ground, and plop himself on the couch in Namjoon’s studio lazily. Namjoon turn off his mixers and put his earphone down.

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A weak voice answered slowly, "It's me Y/N. Open up, please." For the past few weeks, Taehyung had been crashing at your place, and told you about how his day go. He used to vent it out on Do-Ah when she came by the dorm, but you knew that was no longer necessary, because of how bad the condition of his heart is now. And Taehyung refuse to sleep at the dorm too, knowing Namjoon and Do-Ah would be there. He doesn't want their relationship to hurt him more and decided to just stay at yours. As you open the door, once again you were met with his teary eyes. He stare at you sadly and immediately hug you, sniffing on your shoulder like an injured child.

You patted his back. It's been like this everyday. It kills you to see this side of him. The sad, guilty and heartbroken part. He was smiling in front of the camera but behind those smile were a broken heart needed to be mend. You caress his hair and look at him from under your glasses confidently.

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Upon hearing the word love, your eyes widened. Taehyung didn't seem to notice this, as he was busy staring at the couple in the boat in front of you. Your heart beats faster and you told yourself to calm down and not freak out just because he said the L word.

Taehyung listens to you attentively. You knew, he was doing it to forget the pain but you can't push away the attention he was giving you. That night made you happy, as Taehyung is finally trying to move on from his broken heart. Weeks and weeks after that, Taehyung spends more of his time with you. Even his members were jealous because he kept going to yours to play video games, helping you with groceries like an old married couple and ask for your advice about his singing improvements though you knew nothing of the matter. You weren't one to rush things, and you were waiting for the perfect time until Taehyung is completely over Do-Ah for you to tell him how you feel. You had weighed the pros and cons and even if Taehyung cut ties with you after your confession, you're glad that he is feeling better than the him before the Namjoon-Do-Ah betrayal.

You went quiet. Not that you were insecure, but Do-Ah's a big girl. She can take care of herself. Knowing what he did to Taehyung, why would Namjoon leave such an inconsiderate message?

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That's exactly what she did. Namjoon was gone for 3 weeks when she 1st call. Taehyung was at your place, setting the table for dinner as it had been a long day for him at the practice room. You and him were laughing at the burned turkey he was trying to make when his phone rang. Both of you look at the caller ID.

You watch as Taehyung made his way to the living room to talk to her in private. A dull ache was appearing on your chest, but you ignored it. Just because a call doesn't mean Taehyung’s going to run back to her after what she did. Besides, she rejected him? Right? Taehyung came in your line of view after a few minutes. He gave you a contemplated look before raking his hair.

It wasn't. It wasn't the only time he cancelled his plans with you. Ever since that call, he had been spending his time with her again, especially when Namjoon told him to look after Do-Ah in his absence. He had cancelled your zoo date, your grocery shopping date, trying out new dessert at the local Cafe every week date and most importantly, he rarely shows up at your place anymore. Of course, with every cancellation, Taehyung will always apologize and you knew from the tone of his voice it was sincere, since you can't find any fault in the man you love.

And the list goes on. You were frustrated, upset and angry that the only thing she need to do is call him and Taehyung will come running back to her like she didn't just broke his heart a few months ago. You worked so hard to mend his heart and now what? For it to be a plaything for her until Namjoon came back from America? You had tried to warn Taehyung. During your calls, you had told him to be careful, not to easily be swayed with her kindness and remember that she is his hyung's girlfriend no matter what but Taehyung would just laughed it off.

You hated doubting him. Because you know you're no one to him to be jealous. Not his lover, not his wife, not his girlfriend, not anything. You're only a friend. A friend that is so in love with him. A friend that is scared to see him getting his heart broken again.

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Tonight, it was pouring rain. The rain hadn't stopped for a while and according to the weather forecast, it would probably stop tomorrow afternoon. You stared at your phone, looking at the wallpaper of you and Taehyung at the Carnival a few months back. You two look so happy, like a couple in love. He had promised to sleep at yours tonight. After what it feels like a long time, Taehyung called you this morning and tell you he's going straight to yours with a chicken and beer because be misses his best friend so much. What's better is Do-Ah is going on her concert tour soon, so this might mark the day where Taehyung will be all yours again. So here you are, sitting on your couch in your pajamas, waiting for the boy you love with a smile. An hour become two, and finally, unable to open your eyes anymore, you feel asleep while waiting for Taehyung.

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Do-Ah stare at the dark almond shaped eyes boy for a long time. She misses Namjoon a lot, but Namjoon’s absence was making her so frustrated. She didn't even know why she kept calling Taehyung in the first place but having him by her side made her feel safe.

A thunder suddenly cracked. Do-Ah immediately threw her petite body to Taehyung’s bulky one. She hugs him tightly, hearing his loud drumming heartbeat in her ear. Taehyung can feel her ****** on his chest and begin to feel aroused, but he shook those thoughts away and softly push her against her hotel room’s door.

Do-Ah pinch his arms softly. Taehyung gulps but didn't say anything, he didn't understand what Do-Ah is trying to do right now. Taehyung as still in his right mind when in a spur of a moment, Do-Ah closes the distance between them and reach for his lips, kissing him passionately. Taehyung try, oh he really did, pushing her away but her soft kiss made him dizzy. This was his dream all along. To be loved by Park Do-Ah.

Her seductive pleads made Taehyung lost his right mind and that's when he finally give in to his lust, ignoring what's right and wrong between them. The thunder cracked harder with every minute passing by, covering the sinful sound of the smacking of their lips. Do-Ah jumps on his waist, circling her legs around him and Taehyung held her thighs, going in for the kiss deeper. He reach for the hem of her dress and closes the door to the hotel room, locking it behind them.

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Taehyung didn't call you for 3 days straight. You were sure he had his reasons. Taehyung never cancels without telling you why. You were getting anxious, afraid something had happened to him but it made you calmed yourself as there is no bad news about him on the TV is reported. So probably, he's fine. You asked his members where he might have been but they also told you they had no idea, thinking he's staying at your place.

You end the call with a smile at Jin's silliness. No. It's not the time for that. Wait. Why would Taehyung lie to them telling them he's staying with you for the past 3 days when he's not. He's been avoiding your calls and text as well. "Y/N? Open up, it's me!" Speak of the devil. You're going to give him the scolding of his life, a piece of your mind and a knocking on his head for making you worried the past few days. You stomp your way to the door, half happy and half angry that he's making you anxious. You unlock the door and almost greet him with a hit on his head, when he engulfed you in a hug.

BOOM. Those 8 words. Those dreadful 8 words that you though wouldn't come true. It did. And Taehyung broke it to you with the widest smile, not realizing it made your heart split open and bleeds invisibly. You slowly retreat your step from the kitchen and turn to him confusedly.

Everything becomes a blur after that. You didn't want to say anything, not until Taehyung finish his story of how did all this happen in just a matter of 3 days. Taehyung its down on your kitchen counter while you made him some ramyeon. You listen. Listen through it all. Listen about how he tells you about the rainy night 3 days ago where he was supposed to spend it with you watching Iron Man. You listen as he told you how Do-Ah calls him and ask for his help to send her to the hotel near Gocheok Dome for her concert. You listen as the night that was suppose to be your confession night turn out to be the night he endlessly m@ke l0ve to his beloved Do-Ah noona under the sheets at her hotel.

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You clench your hand on the hot bowl tightly, preventing the tears from falling from your eyes as he told you how she was lonely and Namjoon didn't give her the love she wanted from him. You listens as he told you Do-Ah promised to break up with Namjoon so that they could date and she was wrong for choosing Namjoon instead of him who cherishes and worships her much more. You gulp. Everything seems wrong. You didn't know why. Maybe you wanted to own Taehyung. Maybe you were jealous. Maybe you love him too much that you cannot accept the fact that Taehyung just slept with his best friend's girlfriend. Do-Ah was cheating on Namjoon with Taehyung, but poor lovesick Taehyung doesn't seem to realize that. You look at his dreamy eyes and boxy smile, afraid that what you might say may upset him when he realize it.

Taehyung's selfish word made your eyes dull, and your heart breaks. How could an innocent boy turn into this selfish, greedy man just because of love? This isn't love, this…is toxic. Taehyung reached for his jacket on the couch. You reach for him desperately.

As he closes the door behind him, you slide down against it, crying your eyes out. How can love be this painful? How can Taehyung hurt you, the one who had pick up the scattered parts of his heart? This isn't going to end well, you know it.

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Your friendship with Taehyung begins to fade as day goes by. You pretend like you didn't care, but everyone noticed and they knew you do. Your colleague at the coffee shop stare at you for a long time before asking,

Your colleague look at you sadly. You were a kind girl. You were just a simple, college girl with glasses who work hard and happen to fall in love with your best friend slash superstar Kim Taehyung. What an unfortunate event in your life. Your colleague turn the TV on and the celebrity news reported that Kim Namjoon of Bangtan had just return from America this morning. Namjoon looks casual and handsome as ever, with his black outfits and white mask covering his face. He was walking tiredly at Incheon Airport into the black van that is waiting for him. You remember what Taehyung told you a few weeks ago. About Do-Ah's plan to break up with Namjoon once he gets here. You wish the best for all 3 of them of course. You're done getting tangled in their complicated relationship, especially after Taehyung called you clingy and desperate. Clingy and Desperate. Your eyes let out a small tear and quickly wipe it with your apron.

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Usually Do-Ah would be in the living room watching her performance and how to improve it, or writing lyrics for her next album. Namjoon search for her in the bedroom, thinking she was probably having a shower. To his disappointment, she's not anywhere in the house. Namjoon took out his phone and look at his reminder that had their schedule. Do-Ah had already finish her tour a week ago so she's really free for the next month.

He mutters to himself. He tried calling her, but it was send straight to her voicemail. Namjoon dialed for someone and he let out a huge sigh of relief when the person pick it up. “📲Oh! Namjoon ah! How are you?” It was Do-Ah's manager, Kyung.

“📲Oh? But I haven't seen her for a while. She gave me a break ever since she started her concert tours and I'm taking care of my grandma right now.” Kyung told him and he heard the coughing of an old woman at the back. Namjoon bit his lip.

Kyung wonder for a while. “📲Last I heard, she told me she's staying at M hotel near Gocheok Dome. That's all I know, didn't know if she's still staying there though.” Namjoon thanked the loyal manager and turn off his phone. He was about to put it in his pocket before remembering maybe he should stop by your place to give Taehyung his shoes. He contemplates for a few second before cancelling what he intend to do, putting his girlfriend first above all.

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Do-Ah encourage Taehyung's erratic thrüst under the sheets. He had his mouth on one of her brèast, n!bbling on it hungrily. Taehyung knew it was wrong, but Do-Ah’s seductive ways of convincing him that he was all she wanted was too much for him. For the past few weeks, he had never been happier. Although they only get to stay at the hotel to keep their relationship a secret, it was more than enough for Taehyung. He loves Do-Ah too much and if waiting for Namjoon is the only thing standing between his and Do-Ah’s love, he was willing to do this everyday. During the times he was at the hotel, while waiting for Do-Ah to finish her showers or cooking, Taehyung can feel his guilt by ignoring your text. Of course, he misses you but his pride is too big to acknowledge his mistake. That is why he prefer staying with Do-Ah all the time like a golden retriever. Taehyung thrüst slowly, making sure he's appreciating every inch of her body.

Just before they both climaxed, the door to the bedroom burst open, stopping both of then from their sinful act. Taehyung cover Do-Ah with his body, thinking it was her management team or room service since he forgot to lock the door earlier but to their horror…it was Namjoon. His face looks paler, he looks angry, disappointed and sad all mixed in one. His sharp eyes showed a hint of sadness of this immoral betrayal between the girl he loves and his little brother.

But Do-Ah's panic voice was cut short. Namjoon dropped the gifts in his hands and threw it on the carpet floor where Taehyung’s and Do-Ah’s underwear were lying around.

But Do-Ah was gone. Taehyung stare at the door, hugging his knees close to his chest and hear his heart broke for the second time by her.

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Taehyung's sniff got louder and his tears broke your heart once more so you wipe it with your fingers. Again, you bring him to your couch, picking up the shattered pieces of his heart left by Do-Ah. Taehyung spend the night at yours, and teary apologize for everything and told you everything that had happen. You were angry of course, and now you know what kind of person Taehyung’s dream girl truly is. You told yourself it's not wrong of you to hate her before, because she is totally a bitch. Days after the incident, you called Jin and told him what had happen. Jin told you that Namjoon’s been locking up in his bedroom and not eating and Do-Ah kept banging at the door to let her see him. You told Jin that Taehyung is staying with you for a while, recovering from the empty promise Do-Ah made him. Jin understands and says it's the best for him to stay at yours, since sh!t's just got real. What Taehyung did was wrong, and he had realize that. He wanted to apologize to Namjoon, but you advice him maybe its best to let things cool down for a while since cheating is just…unforgivable and what Taehyung and Do-Ah did wasn't once, but for weeks since Namjoon was gone. You begin to cook for Taehyung again, care for him and listens to his heartfelt vent. Every time he cried, you'll always hug his head close to your heart and told him it's going to be alright, he, Namjoon and Do-Ah just needs some time apart from each other. You were trying your best to make Taehyung happy, since you knew you won't be able to do this anymore in another few weeks. You had just graduated and is going home, but Taehyung fails to notice how clean your house are and how some stuff were missing from its original place. One night when Taehyung fell asleep on your lap during the nights you guys watch TV together, you stare at his peaceful sleeping face. Though your own heart was broken by him before, you were still so determined to tell him how much he means to you before you left. You smile sadly and made up some plans in your head before falling asleep as well.

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Taehyung's heart was heavy. You had never beg before. Something about the way your voice sounded so weak and that you needed him more made him immensely guilty. But he can't ignore the phone call with Do-Ah as well. It would be a lie to say that he doesn't love her anymore, because he still did.

That was the last word you said to him before he run as fast as he can to the parking lot, driving like a maniac to reach the girl who had been giving him nothing but pain and heartbreak. You sat still in the boat, hugging your knees close to your chest and sob out loud, mentally cursing yourself on being stupid just like he did. While your heart breaks, you called your friend from university.

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Attempting to distract oneself from world problems and recent heartbreak. It was your intention to find peace here in this small place in Seoul. An attractive man catches your eye, and you choose to have a taste of desire, forgetting about your heartbreak. He has forearm veins that are pure fantasy. The new chapter in life demands fantasy. Imagine the possibility of him grabbing your thighs. You can taste his lips when you take a puff of his cigarette. Lips looking so ready to speak in their own tongue on your body, so willing to reveal the secrets of his body. He glances at you delicately through those fluttering eyelashes, but his body is robbing all other men this night of their right to be with you or any night after tonight.

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Drink after drink and you were pulling Gong Yoo home. You didn’t say goodbye as you left your friends, they just smirked as you dragged the man behind you. Somehow you managed to get your front door open and Gong Yoo had you pressed against the door, he was kissing your lips and down your neck. You tangled your hands in his hair as he placed his lips on yours again.

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You remembered the kisses and the marks that would be shown the next morning. And you remember your clothes finding their way to the floor. What you don’t remember was the sèx and who was the man or getting up to water and aspirin by your bed for the morning. Waking up was a mess. You rubbed the tired from your eyes as you grabbed the water and chugged it with two aspirins. Suddenly last night came back to you as you placed your hand on the other side of the bed of course finding it empty. One night stand. Sighing you pulled yourself out of the bed and made your way to the bathroom wobbling as the events of last night ran its course. From what you could remember the sèx was great I mean obviously since your body was showing. Looking in the mirror you saw a bunch of hickeys and gave a soft smile. Why didn’t he stay or at least leave a number? You grabbed a new pair of panties and a bra as you pulled them on you heard a clatter of pans. Your heart dropped thinking that the man might’ve left the door unlocked and now someone was breaking in. You quickly pulled on an oversized hoodie and slowly made your way downstairs. As you rounded the corner to the kitchen you saw a shirtless Gong Yoo standing in front of the stove with a tea kettle on and a small frying pan. Cladded in only his boxers your heart stopped racing and you sighed making Gong Yoo stop and turn around.

He turned around and went back to the tea kettle which was now whistling. You caught a glimpse of his back and cringed. You walked up behind him and placed your hands on his back and ran your finger down the scratch marks. He tensed at first but relaxed under your touch grabbing two cups from the cupboard.

You walked into your living room and plopped down on the couch pulling your legs up to your chest. Gong Yoo walked in forgetting about making breakfast and sat by your side. You smiled at him and he moved closer to you.

Gong Yoo laughed and suddenly a way hits you, you could so get used to his feeling.

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While with Taehyung.

When Taehyung rush into the room, Do-ah was neither trying to harm herself, or drunk. She was just crying about Namjoon and saying sorry to Taehyung for she realize he was the only one who cared for her when she calls. She told him she did called Namjoon, but it has been days and still he didn't want to see her. Taehyung puts her on her bed but then she reach for his neck and kisses him passionately. Taehyung, being a hot blooded young man with still having some left over feelings for her return the favor and they ended up having sèx again. Taehyung as the first to wake up the next morning.

Do-ah móans as she gave Taehyung a kiss on his shoulder, her nàked back turning the other way to check on her phone. This time, Taehyung feels different. Her kisses were cold, her words were empty, her touch was no longer loving. He stare at the ceiling as he remembered your face, desperately telling him not to go to her again but he doesn't listen. Maybe this time it would be different. Maybe this time— Do-Ah’s phone rang. She looked at the caller and look at Taehyung before taking the call in her bathroom. Taehyung waited patiently, though his heart felt somewhat strange. After what it feels like eternity, Do-ah came out of the bathroom in her bathrobe, fidgeting with the phone in her hand. Taehyung saw the way she bit her lips and her pupil dilated.

Taehyung smirk loudly. He push the quilt that was covering his náked body and reach for his pants and shirts. He felt like a complete idiot for still wasting his time on her. How could he blew out last night? How could he leave you for…for this girl he though was his dream. She was a fcking mistake! A huge fcking mistake!

Taehyung told himself repeatedly, driving to your house in a hurry. When he reached for your house. He wanted nothing more than to spend the night curled up in your arm, watching a few movies and wrapped up in blankets. After whole incident, it seemed the only best thing to him. Because his recharger was you, the girl he believed now was his soulmate, who he wanted to share a last name with in fact. Setting down his jacket, he massaged his aching scalp. Ugh. Where are you? You’d usually greet him home with a hug. Then again, he was here without notifying. And then he heard it. It wasn’t very loud, it could’ve easily been masked had him rummaged through a bag or walked across the room. But he heard it all right. Thump. He assumed it was nothing at first. Maybe you dropped something. Or you were working on something. No biggie. Taehyung shrugged it off, and he heard it again. Thump. Thump. Thump. Furrowing his brows, he decided he should check up on you just in case. Who knows what his best friend could be doing, and no doubt it would end up being stupid yet adorable. Taehyung took another step, and the next sound was what made his blood run cold. He heard a sweet, low groan. A mòan, to be exact. Maybe you were watching that kind of movie because you are all alone, he thought hastily. Or you are just being weird like usual. Thump. Thump. Taehyung tried to come up with more excuses, convincing himself it couldn’t possibly be that. Why would you bring a man to bed when you could be with him? You wouldn’t do anything without telling him. You never dared to so much as look at another man. And then he heard it. Another móan. But not from you this time, this groan was much deeper. What? Panicking, Taehyung quickly scampered to the bedroom, his heart beating wildly in tune to the thumps. His long slender digits were quickly wrapped around the steel knob, the single door knob to your bedroom. To his answers. Thumpthumpthumpthump. He twisted it quickly, yanking it open quickly. He was shocked at the sight before him. His sunbae, Gong Yoo was ramming his length into you, hilt deep. Sweat glistened along your foreheads and chests, and you both were stark náked. The sheets of your bed were scattered across the bed, and clothes littered the floor. The headrest of the bed banged against the wall again, creating the audible thump. A squeak accompanied it, and Gong Yoo was entering the love of Taehyung’s life once again. You möaned out, squeezing your eyes shut and gripping onto the sheets a bit tighter.

Both of your heads jerked up. Gong Yoo’s expression was one of shock, and your expression was one between of shock and absolute nothing.

Rage was now burning your guts, as you remembered all of the events involving that rockie last year. Taehyung was really a prick. Taehyung remained silent, looking at you as if he was having a grand debate inside his head. He was no longer the intimidating boy while he was on the awards table, now he had returned to his old personality, the one you had fallen in love with.

It pained Taehyung when you look at him like that. Your eyes clearly reflects your emotions, you doesn’t wanted to see him. He took a deep breath and with the final look at you, he left with tears in his eyes too. You covered your face with your palms. It hurts you too to see him like that but now you refuse to choose him over yourself anymore.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Maybe it wasn’t so bad when it was just sèx, a one night stand. Maybe Taehyung could’ve got over it when it was just rough sèx, probably from pent up rage. Maybe it was just a cruel way to punish him for making you wait for so long. But Taehyung watches you underneath Gong Yoo, mòaning loudly, six month later after his last visit to your apartment and he found you both in same position like six months ago. He can’t just sit by and watch his sunbae fck the love of his life right in front of him, so he turns straight back around, slamming the bedroom door behind him. He storms into the kitchen, trying to calm himself down a little as he hears the commotion in the bedroom. He clenched his eyes tightly but the image of you with his Gong Yoo sunbae, makes him regret his previous decisions. Only if he could understand his feeling bit earlier. Seeing the way that your lips mould together with Gong Yoo’s breaks him. It’s soft and gentle and–worst of all–it’s loving. It’s too much, and a sob leaves Taehyung’s lips. He hears murmuring, the front door shutting, and then you whispering his name from the doorway. Taehyung suddenly can’t even find it in himself to be angry as he turns around, barely able to meet your eyes,

You shook your head and Taehyung sighed not knowing what to do with all of the information, the only person he could go to for advice was the man, he betrayed for a girl but he grabbed his keys and walked out of your apartment without another word. You didn’t chase after him or went back in your room, you knew it wasn’t fair for your emotions to do that when you had been already gone through the heartbreak process.

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Taehyung didn’t remember when or how he’d gotten to Namjoon’s studio, he knew he drove there but he didn’t remember getting out of the car to go and sit with him.

The penny dropped and Namjoon stared at Taehyung with a shocked expression.

Taehyung knew that Namjoon was right, he was right about everything but it was going to hurt letting you out of his life. Now he was understanding how much pain you were in all those years when you love him. He is experiencing the same pain.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

You laid with your favourite person on the couch. He was laying under you and you had your head on his chest facing the T.V. You were watching his newest role, the salesman, that was his character in the new series Squid Game. It was a pretty small role but definitely made an impact on the audience.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

You woke up, feeling cold. It was like your body knew something was missing. You touched Gong Yoo’s place on the bed. Looking for his warmth, for his presence, but frown when you feel his place empty, but still warm. You waited a few seconds, thinking he was in the bathroom, but when you didn’t hear a sound, you decided to seek him out. It was still very much night time. The moon was still up in the sky, the stars still very much visible. You got up from the bed, dragging the duvet with you to cover your nude body. A shiver ran through your body as you tried your best to walk. You could barely feel your legs and the soreness between your legs, the burning you felt on your thighs, didn’t help your case.

You clench your thighs remembering the dirty word he had said. Words that contradict everything he did. He had been the sweetest lover you could ever had. Your heart soared for him. For his touch once again. He had first eaten you out, made l0ve with your clït with his tongue as his fingers touched the deepest part of you. He had made you cüm two times before finally getting rid of his own clothes. Everything had been slow, unrushed, like time didn’t exist anymore and you were the only thing that mattered to him. It felt amazing when he had finally trusted the inside core. Gently, slowly, sliding in and out of your wetness. Taking the time to get to know your body, all your sweet spots. Last night, he hadn’t fck you like many times before, he had made l0ve to you. It had confused you, made you question what was the nature of your relationship now after six seven months. It made your feelings go up and down like a rollercoaster. Your heart was telling you he loved you, just like you did, but your mind kept on repeating that you were delusional, that he just wanted to go slow because he wanted to, not because of some ulterior motive. When you had both started this arrangement after your one night stand, it was just to relieve stress after works or get rid of overwhelming feelings. You both tried to train it out, but it never worked so you both decided to be good ol’ friends with benefits. You both only had one rule. Maybe the most cliche rule for when people start that sort of relationship, but a very important one nonetheless: No falling in love. If it happened, you were both to stop immediately. He doesn’t wanted it because of his work and you didn’t wanted it because of your feelings for Taehyung. But you broke that rule one month after the first night. At first, you didn’t know what it was you were feeling. You didn’t know why you always craved to be beside him, to look at him, to touch him. Those feelings, you finally figured them out, one night, during an practice for his next project. You were both giggly and playful. Until he got call from someone. You went to the kitchen, but you could still listen to his conversation, because he didn’t bother to pick the phone up instead he put it on speaker. You heard him talking to a woman and by her voice you could tell that she would be beautiful. She was laughing at whatever he was saying, her voice dropped low, making it sound seductive. You felt a pang of jealousy inside of you, growing at each second you listened to them. That was when you realized you love him. You loved the man you just met a month ago. You loved famous Gong Yoo.

You whispered in the darkness, your eyes looking for his figure. A breeze went past the cover, making you shiver and your teeth clashing together.

You turned toward his deep voice. He was sitting by the window of the living room, his eyes trailing the snow slowly falling outside. You couldn’t see his somber expression in the moonlight. Your heart clenched, thinking of the worst.

Was all he said. Your heart was running like a wild horse. It was so loud you could hear it in your ears. Your heart was telling you to ask, ask him what is wrong. Your mind, him, was warning you for the worst, telling you to build walls or you will get hurt.

Your heart shattered. You cursed yourself to not listen to your mind. You plastered a confused expression, trying to hide all the pain, not willing to show him how affected you are by his decision.

You were in shock. Your mouth kept on opening and closing, but with no sound.

It was now Gong Yoo’s turn to be choked. As you said those words, you felt a big bagage on your shoulder finally leaving. Your secret was now out in the open and he was reciprocating your feelings. You don’t know when was the last time you felt that much joy. You smiled when he cupped your face in his big hands. He looked back and forth between your eyes and your lips.

He got rid of your tears and leaned, putting his forehead on yours, connecting the both of you. You looked into his eyes and your eyes fluttered at all the love you could see. You just hoped your eyes could do it to him too.

You nod and let him lead you back into the bedroom. You both slowly layed down on the bed and you covered him with the cover you brought with him. You tangled your legs with his and placed a hand on his jaw, your thumb caressing his rough cheeks. You both looked at each other. You were fighting for your eyes to stay open because you were scared this was all just a dream.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

It seemed week couldn’t have gotten worse, yet somehow it managed to impress you with just how shitty it could get. No one terrible bad thing had happened, it’d just been a stressful, sleepless, and exhausting week on your work place, and to top it all off you kept butchering your big emotional monologue while doing your work today. You were tired, embarrassed, and ready for a night in, much to the disappointment of the rest of your co workers. Since it’s a festive week, it had become a hectic schedule for everyone especially who are working part time due to increase in number of customers. But this week you just weren’t up for it, your social clock was running dangerously low so while the co workers were working overtime, you headed to the little apartment of yours. Plopping on the couch you were honestly a little excited for your planned me time. You had bought your favorite bottle of cheap wine, picked up some fresh cannolis from the cafe downstairs, and popped your favorite comfort movie into your dvd player. Once the movie had began and you’d downed two glasses of wine you finally felt stress of the week wash away. Sinking down into your couch and curling into your blanket you noticed your phone beside you had blown up with notifications. No surprise, they were all from your new boyfriend, Gong Yoo, who is right now in Busan for his photoshoot. You pick up the phone and went through his messages which says nothing but sweet loving things, you smile brightly feeling your tiredness washing away. He made you laugh until your side hurt and you did the same for him. The two of you had settled into a comfortable routine of hanging out long after completing all your work, especially Friday nights after the weekly dinner. He’d always come back to your place and the two of you would watch old movies and chat until the early hours of the morning. By the look of his last few texts he was obviously disappointed by your lack of response. Still reading through his messages you were startled by a quick knock on your door. You paused your movie and jumped to answer the door, knowing just who must be behind it.

You turned quickly as the realization of what you’d chosen for your movie night sunk in. On the screen stood none other the handsome Chinese actor, masked up and mid murder strut. A deep red flush crept over your cheeks as the embarrassment settled. You’d never really told Gong Yoo just how big of a fan you are of Hans Zhang, let alone that his movies tended to be your favorite. The sound of his laughter erupted behind you easing the tension you’d let build. You turned to him a guilty look still on your face.

You let out a little sigh of relief that he hadn’t found the situation too difficult and plopped down next to him. He spent the remainder of the movie telling you funny stories about his time on set and little fun facts about the behind the scenes of shooting. You ended up watching “The Suspect” next, staying up almost all night as he recounted stories of his fun during shooting the movie. After a long and tiring week, and being away from him, it was nice to settle into comfortable conversation with Gong Yoo.

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Gong Yoo hated the fact that Dong Won had the nerve to talk about your relationship like that as if Gong Yoo wasn’t already insecure about the age gap, he not only worried about the reaction of fans and media but also of the reaction from your family. He took a deep breath before getting in his car.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

The ride to your apartment went on longer than Gong Yoo would have liked, considering how he was feeling, but he was glad when you suggested to watch a late night movie. Part of you didn’t want to leave the welcoming party at wotk, but something about the way Gong Yoo spoke on the phone with you didn’t settle well with you. Everyone said their goodbyes and parted ways. You’re sure a couple of them stayed though for more drinks. Sung and Jae, you assumed. Its not like they can actually get drunk, those boys have really big drinking capacity.

Gong Yoo sighed and threw his head back against the couch. You frowned at his actions. You knew at some point in the night Gong Yoo started acting a little weird but you wondered why. He went out to chill with his friends so what happened.

You racked your brain for what could have made Gong Yoo start feeling this way. Was it something you said? Or something that you did? Just then, you remembered, he went out with his friends. Something might have happened with them.

Even though you asked, that had to be it. All Gong Yoo seemed to be doing tonight was sighing. He nodded and started pacing again, disregarding the fact that you were still standing in his way. Gong Yoo didn’t agree or disagree but his attitude said it all. Maybe all the jokes from Dong Wook and Jung-Jae really did get to him or does he again get in fight with Dong Won.

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Christmas. One of the most magical days of the year. Full of happiness, family, friends and so on. Before you met Gong Yoo you almost hated these days but he had managed to change your mind about it during those two years you had been together. Now when December arrived you became a child again and you forced him to decorate your apartments more brightly. You always managed to get the biggest tree of all and had Gong Yoo decorate it with you, which took hours. Anyhow, you knew there was going to be something different this year. It had to be. It was about time. You had spent four years away from home and your parents had decided to spend Christmas with you, so they called you back to home, which also meant they would like to meet Gong Yoo and it was you who had to break the news to him.

Before you had time to say anything, he pecked your lips and went back to his apartment. Your only choice was to go out and buy gifts for your parents. When Gong Yoo was in the living room of his apartment he saw Dong Wook and Jung-Jae playing Wii so he just sat there with them, kind of lost in his thoughts as he tried to imagine multiples possible scenarios about the next day.

The news made them stop the game and look at Gong Yoo. They looked almost as shocked as him a few minutes ago. What was wrong with these people? You and him had been dating for two years now, your parents knew about it, it was the normal thing to do next, right?

Gong Yoo looked at them for a moment before nodding, he knew it’s going to be hard to convince your parents. Jung Jae is right. There was no middle ground when someone met Gong Yoo: you loved him or you hated him. It was complicated but he hadn’t think about until now and then his anxiety level increases. When Dong Wook and Jung Jae went back to their videogame Gong Yoo got up and went out to balcony for some fresh air.

Gong Yoo scratches the back of his neck and nodded still feeling nervous but Dong Won was right. Being nervous in this situation was something completely normal and you will understood how Gong Yoo might be feeling. Probably, you would be feeling the same if you had to meet his parents.

The four of them spent the rest of the afternoon talking and playing until Gong Yoo decided to go to your apartment and look for you. You were probably even more shaken up now after spending the whole afternoon thinking about what was about to come. All his friends wished him the best of lucks as they went to the kitchen to grab some dinner. Finding you was easy. Every time you get nervous, you spent the time at the same place: the kitchen. And there you were. Exactly how he left you hours before. Smiling a little he walked over to where you were seated and wrapped his arms around you from behind. Immediately, he felt how tense you were so he kissed your neck softly making you let out a shaky breath.

You asked, not really needing an answer since you already knew it. Still, it took him a while to answer your question. You stopped what you were doing to the batter and turned on the chair to face him. With a warm smile, he took you to the living room and made you sit on his lap so he could wrap his arms around you and snuggle his face in the crock of your neck. Slowly, you started stroking his hair.

It still took him a while to move, obviously still thinking about the imminent dinner. But finally he took a deep breath and got up, took your hand and the both of you walked out of the living, to cook together.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Next day you were supposed to be present at your house around noon. It was going to be the first time after four years you were going to see them, and added to meeting Gong Yoo, it made you feel more nervous than ever. You tried to calm down, telling yourself it was just your parents and family. They loved you and they would be okay with Gong Yoo once they saw how happy you were with him. Or that’s what you expected. Your nervousness was visible in the amount of times you changed outfits for the night. You changed at least 5 different ones until Gong Yoo chose one for you and forbid you from changing once again. You complained but you were actually grateful for the help. So once you had done your hair and make-up, you went back to your room to find Gong Yoo buttoning up his black shirt. He had showered and his hair was still wet but he was already dressed in his black pants and black shirt.

When you heard those words, your stomach went crazy and you looked at Gong Yoo who gave you an encouraging smile.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

You had to pause as you tried to contain your laughter for the final part of your story, Gong Yoo was laughing with you but he was also mainly focused on your face as you giggled. It made his own heart race a little too fast and his chest feel tight and fluttery. It made him fall even more in love with you as your nose scrunched and your eyes were squinted so tightly that a tear rolled down your cheek.

He giggled like a maniac and you joined in, a hand covering your mouth as you laughed and tears rolled down your cheek several more times. His laughter combined with your laughter, was one of your favorite sounds. Minutes passed before either one of you calmed down enough to realize you still had a dinner to go to.

You pouted, turning to look at him with a forced pout and pleading eyes. This was your first boyfriend you had ever brought home to your mom, dad and your crazy family. He reached over and squeezed your hand in his, you squeezed back tightly. You were glad he was finally meeting your family, but at the same time, they could be a bit…intense.

You looked over at him, a giggly feeling taking over your stomach as you admired his sparkling eyes that calmed your nerves and made you blush. You used your free hand and caressed his cheek softly, tilting your head as you looked at him for a moment.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

You yelled as you walked into the living room, seeing your entire family, playing cards, you shout startled them. Your cousins whine and throw few cards towards you while your step-grandfather goes “Y/N” with his strict tone, but he smiled nevertheless seeing his favourite granddaughter after years. The room the bursted with screams of kids, rushing to you and we missed you's from your family. They all hugged you with smiles on your faces. You walked as fast as you could to hug your grandfather. Just then, you realised how much you had missed him and your family and how much you needed them. He hugged you tight at the same time, rubbing your back as your mother sobbed silently, watching the grandfather-granddaughter’s loving meeting.

Your grandfather immediately looked at the entrance of living room where Gong Yoo was awkwardly standing, waiting for you to introduce them. Taking a deep breath, you walked over to Gong Yoo and took his hand.

“Oh tell me about it! It took me ages to talk Y/N into telling me about you.” your aunt said looking at you, causing you to roll your eyes. “When she told us she was dating Gong Ji-Cheol we thought it was a joke.” your cousin, Ruth confessed making you two laugh.

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While with your family.

They walked towards the kitchen when they saw you and Gong Yoo sitting in the small room near the kitchen. Your backs were towards your mother but she can still see you holding a book. She heard you talking and hid behind the pillar to eavesdrop.

Your mother smiled lovingly when she saw you both together. He already had your mother’s approval even before she met him, she guessed it already as what kind of man he is whenever you talk about him. She knew Gong Yoo knows not just you but he was aware of your soul and heart. She walk back to the living room and announced–

Time skip.

Everyone take there places in dinning room for supper. You were sitting next to Gong Yoo and just in front of you both sits your father, glaring at you. You choose to ignore him and continue to talk to your aunt. Your grandfather was at head of the table, observing his granddaughter’s boyfriend.

“Brother if you again tried to disapprove their relationship, I swear to god I will make my niece run away with this gentleman!” Your aunt stated angrily. “Come on can’t you see how much they love each other.”

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After a lavish dinner and exchange of gifts, you both came back to your apartment. You both were in your sleepwear, in the living room, having coffee while watch a movie but you were not really paying attention to what was on television. You wanted to talk about what he said during your family dinner. It's been on your mind the whole time.

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3 MONTHS LATER

Taehyung was taken aback to see you in jeju island. He was here for vacations and saw you walking the cobbled streets with your bag in one hand and your camera in another. He hadn’t seen you for almost two year now. It seemed like he had forgotten how beautiful you looked because as he was looking at you now with the sun shining in your face, you looked ethereal. Your hair was shorter now, but the style really suited you. What he noticed instantly though was how happy you looked. He was taken back to the night when you were begging him to stay, your eyes turned teary because he left you alone there for another girl. He never forgave himself for everything he done to you, he regrets hurting your feelings. You never forgave him too. Even when he apologized a million time, even when he cried a million times and even when he promised you that you were the only one he loved. It was true. He really did love you. Even now after two year. He hadn’t dated anyone since then. So seeing you here on island he thought he should talk to you. Until he saw a familiar face coming out of the ice cream store with two ice creams in his hand. (Your favourite ice cream flavour), your favorite. You took the ice cream and gave the man a small peck. Taehyung could do nothing but stare at the two of you walk away hand in hand. The distance he thought, definitely did you well and he was by no means going to hurt you again by coming into your life.

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Taehyung halted when he heard Jimin softly whispering a familiar name "Y/N." obviously they were shocked to see after two years. You cut off everyone, who was related to Taehyung, from your life. “Isn’t that Gong Yoo sunbae with her?” Jungkook said in shocked voice, making Taehyung take a sharp breath. Taehyung looked at the couple on the other side of the road, even being away from you he could still hear your giggles. He wished that smile on your face was because of him but alas he missed everything. He knew you were with someone but still he wanted you. He wanted to know what happened? Why it happened?

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It was June, with temperatures soaring as usual. The streets were lined with people, city-dwellers and tourists alike. You wiped the damp sweat from your brow, shook out your shirt, anything to diminish the almost-suffocating heat. Taehyung strolled by your side in his typical disguise—black sunglasses and an oversized bucket hat that cast a dark shadow over his face. You met him on the way back to hotel, you weren’t angry with him anymore. You were instead glad to have your friend back, A Vespa sped along the road, and Taehyung quickly moved you to the inside of the pavement, his arm curving protectively around your waist.

He grinned down at you. Your phone vibrated in the back of your jean shorts, and you pulled it out, letting go of his arm which you accidentally hold when he moved you.

Taehyung’s brows quirked at the beginning of your sentence, and you could tell he was watching you, even beneath the sunglasses.

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‘Silent Sea’ star Gong ji-cheol spotted smooching mystery woman in Seoul.

Looks like Gong Yoo has a hot new love interest. The “Silent Sea” star was photographed kissing a mysterious woman in a car in Seoul over the weekend, photos obtained by Page Six reveal. Gong Yoo, 41, was seen passionately locking lips with the (y/h/c) beauty during a lunch date outside of a cafe. The pair seemed to pay no mind to onlookers as they kissed in the car. Gong Yoo and the woman appeared to be enjoying the intimate moment, closing their eyes as paparazzi caught them mid-smooch. The actor was dressed casually in a bomber jacket and jeans, while his lucky lady wore a denim jacket over a white colored sweater, jeans and sneakers.

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Gong Ji-Cheol confirmed to be in a serious relationship, agency reveals.

K-drama Coffee Prince actor Gong Yoo is officially dating a commoner. His agency confirmed their relationship after the South Korean news outlet Dispatch reported about them who caught the couple kissing and confirmed they have been dating for almost two years now. Reports also claimed that Gong Yoo and his girlfriend celebrated Christmas together in Anyang, South Korea this year. Following the dating rumours, the Goblin actor’s agency Management SOOP released a statement. The agency quoted them saying, “Hello. This is Management SOOP. This is an official statement regarding the exclusive article about actor Gong Ji-Cheol Actor Gong Ji-Cheol and his girlfriend progressed from being close acquaintances into being a couple, and they are maintaining a serious relationship.” The company also urged fans to extend their support for the couple. “Please show lots of support so they can continue their beautiful relationship. Thank you,” they added. Earlier this year, Gong Yoo made news with his acceptance speech at the 20xx MBC Drama Awards when he mentioned “that person” while addressing everyone from stage. It was none other than his mysterious girlfriend.

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The news had hit Taehyung hard. He thought that nothing would ever compare to how he felt when he found out about his dream girl’s relationship with his hyung or when he get to know about his dream girl’s true personality.Though honestly, he shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, Do-Ah was cheating on his hyung with him and doesn’t even has an ounce of regret for it. He thought it’s hard to see his hyung with Do-Ah but this feeling right now was harder. Then he got a message from Jimin. Did you know Gong Yoo sunbae and Y/N were a thing? Can’t believe they’ve been together for over two years already and no one knew. The press is going nuts. Sunbae getting married will be the biggest news this year. Taehyung didn’t bother to reply. He grabbed the remote, flipping through the channels with a thundering heart until he stopped randomly. Sure enough, there you were with Gong Yoo by your side, a giant diamond ring on your finger. You were smiling, laughing so beautifully and suddenly Gong Yoo leans down to capture your lips in a searing kiss. Taehyung’s chest hurt. He couldn’t tear his eyes away. His hands twitched at his sides. He should’ve called. He should’ve pressed the call button the times he tried calling you. He should’ve come to your doorstep, demanded that you talk. He should’ve told you the truth, should’ve said he loved you after every single thing you did for him. Should’ve been a better man and treated you right instead of a rehab to heal his broken heart. Instead of leverage against his then, cruel dream girl. But now, he’s too late. You were someone else’s fiancé. He had lost you before he could ever have you. Taehyung wondered if he was part masochist. He had to be. He had to be if he was really there, sitting at one of the chairs, watching as Gong Yoo fretted by the altar. He wondered if he should leave. Should he be here in the first place? To find an invitation for him was a surprise in itself, but to actually come and watch you get married off to someone else who wasn’t him? That was suicidal. He didn’t have the chance to make a quick escape because the song started playing. He stood along with the others and everyone turned to gaze at you. Taehyung told himself not to. He told himself not to look at you wearing that white gown. To not see the most beautiful smile on your face. But he was weak. He was always too weak. He held his breath when he turned. There you were, with your arm around father’s, in a white gown that fit you so well. Your hair had been done into a bun. Jewels pinned it into the center with the veil draping down. Your lips a vibrant red, eyes shinning with excitement for the new chapter in your life. You were so breathtakingly beautiful. So full of life, happiness and love.

Absolutely nothing could have prepared him for this. Because now, in this moment, as you take step by step closer to the altar, Taehyung realizes that this is actually happening. There is no script. No lines. No directors to shout “cut” and everything will go back to the way it was. This was reality. Your reality. His reality. Two sentences, two people, two different paths when it could’ve been one sentence, one couple and one path. You were looking up to Gong Yoo who was grinning like a fool. The bastard knew he had lucked out. Gong Yoo had watched you like a man in love. Like no one in the world could compare because to him, no one could. You owned his heart. Every single part of him. Anyone who saw him would know this to be true. And Taehyung was one of them. He watched on as you walked by him, not noticing he was staring because you were far too invested on your soon to be husband. By the time you reach the altar, say your vows and leaned in for the kiss that would forever seal you away, Taehyung was finally strong enough. He was strong enough to look away, but still far too weak to let go. So when the crowd started yelling, clapping and screaming out their happiness for you, Taehyung had been staring at the marble floor, not seeing, but knowing what they were yelling for.

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The next time Taehyung sees you was at the award show. Cameras flashed as he, for the first time in a while, walked onto the red carpet by himself. No friend or date by his side. He smiled at the cameras, looking and turning to every direction when the crowd of fans started yelling louder. Taehyung turned to look at where the commotion was and found you stepping out with Gong Yoo. You smiled so pretty, red lips spread and cheeks flushed with color. The gorgeous beaded cream gown had matched Gong Yoo’ tux. It wasn’t just your beauty that overwhelmed him. Not the blinding smile on your face, or the new hairstyle you had. No. It was something entirely different. The prominent swell of your belly had his breath caught in his throat. You wrapped a hand around Gong Yoo’s extended arm and the gold band of your wedding ring gleamed against the flashing lights. You leaned up to kiss Gong Yoo’s jaw, giggling when you had to wipe away the red staining his skin. But Gong Yoo wasn’t upset, no, he only looked that much more in love with you.

And Taehyung hadn’t wanted to admit it, but he saw the same reflect from your eyes. The eyes that once looked at him and watched as he hugs you. He swallowed down his pride, forced the stinging of tears back because he knew. He turned when you both made your way up the carpet. He didn’t look when the crowd yelled louder because he knew you’d kissed then. Just like at the wedding. He sat as far away as he could in the show. And when Gong Yoo’s speech came and he mentioned you. Taehyung felt a bitter smile curl on his lips when the camera shows your proud smile. Taehyung didn’t linger back, nor did he take a moment to greet anyone else. He simply stood, turned to the exit and walked. But he stopped, couldn’t resist the urge to look back once more to see if you ever watched after him again like all those times before. So he looked, and a huff of a shaky laugh leaves him because you hadn’t even noticed he was there. You were wrapped up in Gong Yoo’s arms, smiling into his chest like you belonged there. And maybe you do. Maybe he was just a chapter in your life and Gong Yoo was a whole separate story. Maybe this was exactly how it was supposed to play out. But regardless, he knew the unspoken promise would be kept. He would never forget you. Hardly ever woke up without thinking of your name. You didn’t even need to ask him of that. But Taehyung wonders what face you would’ve made a few years ago. What your reaction would’ve been had he told you of your reality now. That he didn’t forget you, but you forgot him.

HOPE YOU ALL LIKE THIS🌈

Kim Taehyung didn’t know what the statistical probability of bumping into your childhood sweetheart in the middle of the street in a foreign country was but he guessed it was very slim. Despite not seeing you for over ten years, when he saw you, it was like nothing had changed—at least in the emotions he was feeling. The butterflies in his stomach still fluttered and his heart still beat like there was no tomorrow. The smile plastered on your face reminded him of the times he looked at you from across the window of your classroom during Physics class taught by a teacher whose voice easily put half of the students asleep and he remembered how that smile easily recharged him and made any bad days of his be better. Your hair looked a bit different now, you changed your Messy Quiff hair style. The last time he saw you, you were wearing a white shirt with grey sweater and blue denims. Now, you were dressed in a pair of green pants, a plain black shirt tucked underneath, black boots and a black backpack hanging on your shoulder. You were real and standing just few steps away from him. Taehyung gets the nostalgia feeling, he was pulled back in past when for the first time he saw you, and how you became the most important person in his entire life.

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He is wearing a dinosaur backpack as big as himself. He has a little navy tie and a navy sweater vest and charcoal-grey shorts that don’t hide his bony knees, and he clutches a small pink notebook in both of his hands as he trails behind the rest of his class, with the teacher at the head. He slows down as he passes the windows of the classrooms, gazing into them to see lines of the older kids diligently copying down weird maths questions from the whiteboard. They’ve got letters in them. “Taehyung?” He glances away from the class, running towards his teacher and rejoining his class as they snake their way through the building into the one beside it. They slow down to a stop in front of another classroom. It sits on the ground floor and has a red door, which slides open to reveal another teacher. The two women smile and greet each other, and the one who opened the door waves Taehyung’s class inside. He doesn’t really listen to the teachers. He thinks he probably should, but standing in front of twenty bigger girls and boys is terrifying. He clasps his notebook to his chest, running his fingers obsessively over the bumpy leatherette surface as he stares at his polished black shoes. A hand places itself on his shoulder. He glances up at his teacher. She smiles down at him, extra gentle because he’s the youngest, and says, “Your buddy is right over there. Will you go say hello?” He gulps and nods, casting his eyes over the seated students until he falls upon a boy with his hand in the air. A digital casio watch with a black strap sits around his wrist. shuffling closer, he takes a cautious seat in front of the other boy. His desk is next to him. All the big kids are sitting on the floor next to their desks, and Taehyung wonders if it’s to make them appear less scary and tall. “Hi.” whispers the other boy, hushed to allow the teachers to continue pairing off the little ones.

Even if he wanted to, Taehyung couldn’t speak. It’s as if his throat’s closed up like a valve, and he can’t control the handwheel. “My class,” Taehyung’s teacher calls, “Take out the green books I gave you, please.” Taehyung shrugs off his backpack and unzips it, tugging out the staple-bound exercise book. It’s so new the pages refuse to lay flat. “This is the book you’ll share with your buddy. At the end of every week, your job is to write about what you did with them, what you enjoyed, and maybe what you didn’t. Don’t be scared to say what you think. The only one who’ll be reading them is me.” she continues, “Inside is a booklet of activity ideas. Choose any of them, or do something else. We have markers, papers, and scissors at the front, and if you want something else, just come and ask me or Mrs Min. Have fun!” the classroom fills with noise and chatter. Taehyung sees how excited some of his classmates are, having had the luck to already know their buddy. Two of them are partnered with their elder siblings, and they have no problem deciding what to do.

Taehyung’s attention snaps back to you. He slides the printed booklet out from between the pages of his exercise book. His eyes glaze over the further down the list he gets, still unused to reading and matching the syllables to their sounds in his head. He ducks his head and thrüsts it towards you. It is impossible not to notice how small he is compared to the rest of his class. His clothes hang off his frame, and the sleeves of his shirt are folded up a few times just to keep them at wrist length. You guess that it’s sized up on purpose for him to grow into, but right now, he’s swimming in them. For the moment, you set aside the booklet of activities and lean forward to glance at his exercise book. as his buddy, it’s your job to take care of the younger one.

Taehyung says nothing, picking at the corner of his pink notebook. it’s a soft, pale colour, like strawberry milk.

Taehyung lifts his eyes. A tiny gasp leaves his lips as he sees the small, warmly coloured puppies on a clear sheet of plastic. Picking up the sheet, with a careful glance at you first to make sure it’s alright, he draws it ever so gently closer to his face. After a minute of intense deliberation, he peels off a small tri-coloured beagle and smooths it across the lined rectangle in the upper corner, where a name would normally go. Without meeting your eyes, he holds out the stickers and pushes his book towards you.

Taehyung’s eyes meets yours for the first time. They’re big and round, and paired with his visible front teeth past his parted lips, he sort of looks like a cub. If he had the ears of one, they’d be sticking straight up in alarm.

His big eyes flicker between you and the sheet of stickers before slowly accepting it. He handles it carefully like you’ve never seen before, and lays it flat between the pages of the green book to make sure it doesn’t get wrecked in his bag. You glance around, noting your classmates building lego towers, reading picture books, and colouring in pages together. Taehyung sits quietly in front of you, watching you from the corners of his eyes.

You jump on your feet, and rustle around in your pencil case for some coloured pens and markers. You nearly smack your knuckles against the desk when you feel a slightly cold hand slip into yours. Taehyung stares up at you, brown eyes above a button nose almost afraid. The top of his head barely reaches your chest. The feeling in your chest is so warm you could mistake it for your heart literally melting. You beam down at him and squeeze his hand. He squeezes back, now smiling with a boxy smile.

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Taehyung was very small and very sensitive and you will do everything in your power to make sure nobody ever hurts him.

He rolls his eyes— oh dear, he’s learning from the kids his age— and makes a big show out of wiping his cheeks, still soft and plump with youth.

You laugh and jog into the boys’ changing rooms next to the soccer field, where a couple of adults oversee a casual game between some early arrivals for the next group.

Taehyung pushes you and you poke his cheek in retaliation. You run off before he can do anything else and he hears your laughter echo off the tiled walls. He wanders over to the bench outside the changing room and dumps his backpack by his feet, the weight of a billion books eased from his poor shoulders.

You lead him across the field, waving goodbye to your coach and the girls, Taehyung was watching earlier. He glances down, his hand’s entwined with yours, and he hadn’t noticed it until he looked. It always feels náked when he isn’t holding anything— a bottle of water, a notebook, his blue mp3 player— but especially so when you’re not around to hold his hand for him.

You follow his finger and hum softly. The clouds were bright, glowing shade of pink, shadowed with a pretty grey-purple. They float across a blue-pink backdrop, and the sun touches them with streaks of orange. The clouds were thick and fluffy, patterned like the sand beneath lazy sea waves, rippling across the sky.

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Riding home from a tutor’s house the next suburb over is calming. The chains of your bike click rapidly as you descend your favourite hill, wind whipping your tie over your shoulder. The hill is a straight line down at a good angle—not so steep as to be dangerous, and not so flat that you need to urge the bike through. The roads and small blocky shops turn into houses and narrow streets, and your bike ticks along cheerfully as you come to a stop in front of a single-storey home with a neat, grassy front lawn and a line of hip-height bushes. A blue family suv is parked on the driveway. You jump off and lean the bike against the white picket fence, kicking the stand down next to the mailbox. You have a lock for it, but you’ve never had to trouble yourself with it in this neighbourhood. Bounding up the front steps and kicking off your shoes, you invite yourself in and call out.

“Hello, dear,” she calls back from the dining room. she appears shortly after, smiling gently. “Did you have a good day at school?”

She nods, taking you by the arm and leading you into the comfortable kitchen. You take the apple she offers you from the fruit bowl. It means study hard and remember to take breaks. “Yes,” she affirms, “He’s upstairs in his room. He was in a bit of a mood earlier. I’m sure seeing you will make him happy— the boy adores you.”

“You’re welcome.” she hums, watching you make your way casually around the corner. Once you’re out of sight, she hears you break into a run, reaching his bedroom in just a few strides. She shakes her head fondly. They grow up so fast, she thought. You barge into Taehyung’s bedroom without waiting for him to answer your rapid knocks.

Taehyung lays on his stomach on a soft blue beanbag, a stack of comics next to his head. He has one of them propped open against the floor, and a black radio rests on top of his bookshelf. Soft pop songs waft through the air, stirred gently by his open window.

He doesn’t give any indication he’s heard you. He flips a page. The smile slips from your face and you take a quiet spot next to him on his bed. The mattress’ springs creak under your sudden weight. You lean forward, elbows resting on your knees, and it creaks again.

He rolls onto his side, tucking into himself. He’s taller now—got a little more length to those limbs—but his white t-shirt’s too big for him, the shoulder lines dropping over his upper arms. It makes his arms seem skinnier in comparison. He adjusts his grip on the comic. You sit unsurely on the edge of his bed. His white desk sits next to it under the window, and a haphazard stack of homework rests untouched next to the lamp. The apple in your hand is smooth and cool, red all the way around except for a round, yellow, leaf-shaped patch near the top. A brown eevee plushie smacks him in the back and bounces off.

You don’t know what to say. You know he’s painfully shy, but he’s never voiced such thoughts to you before as if he thinks he’s somehow unworthy of your friendship.

Oh. Leaning back on an arm, sinking further into his familiar mattress, you try to catch his eye. He turns away, picking at a loose thread in his shorts. Your gaze drops to his hands. Paper cuts love him, so do bruises, which appear every time he bangs his hip or shoulder into a table or door frame, either too immersed in a comic he’s reading or trying to take the shortest path somewhere. You’ve often teased him about his tendency to act like a ghost, thinking that walls won’t stop him. He used to love his Spiderman bandaids. He doesn’t wear them anymore—says he’s too old for them. You realise you miss putting them on for him.

Taehyung falls quiet for a long time. You spin the apple in your hand, throwing it into the air and catching it with a satisfying slap. You sigh heavily and fall back against his mattress, bouncing slightly. You toss the apple above your head, catching it idly. You ask him, one arm over your stomach,

Lurching over towards him, you finally manage to meet his eyes. They’re red, puffy, and his face seems…drained, somehow. On its own, your hand stretches out and cups his cheek. His skin is so, so soft, and warm. Hot, in the way cheeks are after a hard cry. His eyes flutter shut and he leans into your palm, your thumb brushing the skin beneath his eye.

And then you feel it, the feeling of his lips on yours. Your eyes widen painfully, thoughts of glittering tears and drying them falling abruptly off a precipice inside your mind. It’s like a gaping ravine opening up over a well-worn country road beneath you. Like descending a set of stairs and missing a step, with that fleeting split second where your heart jumps into your throat. Like cutting up oranges and the stuttered shock of slicing your thumb. He fumbles with your hand and twists your fingers together. His teeth click against yours. His lips are soft. the kiss is clumsy. He pulls away slowly as if he’s been shaken awake from a supernatural possession in those movies he forces you to watch, only to hide his face with a pillow at every jumpscare. Hastily, he tugs his hand away.

It takes a blank moment before your mind catches up. Then you’re calling his name and tripping over yourself to run after him, apple sitting forgotten on his bed. You hammer on the locked bathroom door.

The earth goes silent. Even the running water downstairs from the kitchen sink stops. The lock slides out of place. Taehyung peeks around the edge through a tiny crack, gazing up through his lashes.

You open your arms. He crashes into your chest, making you stumble slightly. You have to remember that he’s grown solid, no longer the wisp of a boy he once was. You wrap your arms around him tight, squeezing him until his back pops and he exhales. He holds you just as hard. You smile and press your cheek to the top of his head. His silky locks are soft and scented with his honey and vanilla shampoo. He burrows his face into your shoulder, the curve of his nose resting against your neck. You feel like you’re eleven again, holding him as he cries about a raw scrape on his knee. Such a sweet little thing, your Taehyung, with his big brown eyes and soft laughter. You can’t bear the thought of him hurting.

The word ‘kiss’ kicks his heart to his throat and he barely has time to remember what it means before your lips are on his. This one is gentler. You laugh slightly as he fumbles, unused to such affection, and his lips press back nervously against yours. The unfamiliar actions feel…nice. The word leaves something to be desired, far too lacklustre, but he isn’t sure how else to describe the utter contentment blooming under his ribs. It’s so perfectly pleasing, the way your hand tenderly strokes his cheek. Your kisses—they’re soft and slow, bringing to mind memories of lazing about in the dappled shade of trees in the middle of summer, cool grass soothing sticky skin. He hums against your lips, melting completely in your arms. He likes kissing you, he likes tugging you down by your school tie, he likes how you gasp at his sudden liquid courage, drunk on the warmth of your lips. he smiles as your heart skips a beat. It’s a pity that you have to part eventually. Neither of you wants to let go, refusing to pull away until he forces himself to for his own good. He pants, each breath deep and quick, and his ribs ache as if he’s run a marathon. To hide his growing blush, he rests his cheek against yours, though the gentle rumble in your chest tells him you’ve noticed.

You accept your new role as boyfriend with pleasure. He hums lightly into the kiss and presses his soft palm to yours, dried paint and scribbled reminders familiar as your own face in the mirror. You just know he’ll be asking for kisses at every chance—but who would ever refuse him?

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Taehyung looked at the man, he once adored the most again. He blinked when those (Y/E/C) eyes met with his. His breath hitches when his first and only boyfriend, ex-boyfriend smiled at him, it almost felt like yesterday, smiling ear to ear, wide boxy like smile with a crimson red blush when his older boyfriend promised to marry the younger boy, him in future with the very same smile on his lips. But there was no love for him in those eyes of his ex lover now. There was no happy memory persisting around you both instead, Taehyung saw flashes of his broken promise in those (Y/E/C) eyes. He failed to keep the one thing he thought he have from you, your love. But now he doesn’t see any kind of affection for him in your eyes.

Taehyung felt his heart drop at the mention of ‘fiancé’ and his eyes trailed down to the shiny silver band with small ‘N’ engraved on it around your ring finger. He didn’t know what to say or what to do after what you had just so casually said. Here he was, thinking maybe this encounter would lead to something more by the time the day ended only to be slapped by reality in the most heartbreaking way. But he didn’t want to let you see it. Perhaps it was his pride taking over but he didn’t want you to see that he was hurting. So, he smiled as wide as he could and from the years of being in the limelight, he easily stepped into the role of someone who was a good actor.

It was like he was getting stabbed, or maybe it was worse. Taehyung hadn’t been stabbed before but he thought perhaps being stabbed was a more welcoming feeling than what he was feeling right now. He should’ve probably declined the invitation but,

The both of you began to eat. He didn’t know how it felt for you but for him, eating with you brought back many memories he thought were fading over the course of ten years ago. He remembered the times the both of you would eat fish cake after school or how you would secretly bring black bean noodles from the restaurant you were working part-time at to their old building where he and the rest of Bangtan were practicing for their debut. As you were eating, your phone buzzed and you glanced at it, smiling as you read the notification.

And with the way your eyes lit up as you mentioned of your fiancé’s name, he knew, there was no more chance for a do-over.

Now that was news to him—you never dated anyone. He wanted to ask why, heart in his throat but then, you lit up once more, a big smile stretched on your face and you stood up from your chair, leaving the booth and him. Taehyung followed you with his gaze, looking over his shoulder as he watched you hug a younger boy, burying your face in the crook of his neck. As the boy hold you tightly. He put his head on your shoulder, smiling ear to ear. You lift your hand and caressed his hairs and whispered something which wasn’t audible to Taehyung. But by the face that the boy make, he knew you must have whispered something loving and sweet, which once was only for Taehyung.

Taehyung swallowed the lump in his throat, steadying his breath as you led Nunew towards him with your hand on your fiancé’s waist. He immediately stood up, extending his hand out once you formally introduced your fiancé to him.

You laughed softly and said a small sure. After saying your farewell, he watched as you and Nunew walked, your hand never leaving his back, out of the restaurant and a small part of him hoped you’d look back but you never did and he stood there, lost and in pain, watching you giving your affection and protection to your new lover, your fiancé, Chawarin Perdpiriyawong.

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Nunew thought surprising you at restaurant would have assuaged his green-eyed monster. He is right there, he had assumed. He could assure himself that you love him fully and without hesitation. Yet, as he stands opposite to the glass wall, his black backpack on his shoulder, the insidious illness digs into the soft flesh of his heart. Taehyung looks so good with you. The height difference between you and Nunew is noticeable, but with Taehyung, it is the first thing he sees. Taehyung’s face is carved like a Greek god, so fine, Nunew thought. You watch Taehyung as he speaks about his life and all, as if your eyes were the camera, capturing the finest masterpiece of world. Your arms were crossed, when you talk about something serious. Taehyung is handsome, anyone with eyes would agree, and insecurity whispers in Nunew’s ear, curling cold bony hands over his shoulders. He shakes them away as best as he can but they hang on tight, and he lacks the strength to fend them off. He grows cold, inside, and even hugging your backpack which he steals from you does little to warm him. It should— holding things that belong to you have always done so. The sweater he wears? Not his. Yours. He loves it so much you've never worn it since you began dating, and it has a comfortable and steady place of pride in the middle of his closet. The low drop of the shoulder lines, the too-long sleeves, the soft and heavy weave—it all reminds him of you.

A twisted sort of pride and smugness fills him. Just by being there, he had thwarted unsavoury intentions. It would explain why Taehyung had not greeted him with the warmth in his voice, his smile was forced, a fake smile unlike with you. Nunew could see through Taehyung. Still, Nunew fears taking his eyes off of you, and he doesn't blink, not even when his eyes begin to water. He has to eventually. Nunew hold your arm tight just to feel your presence next to him. But he still couldn’t shake of the insecurity, he felt. It's all about you, all about Taehyung. You're the earth to Taehyung's sun. Taehyung speaks, you watch him and listen to him, and Nunew, the moon, stands off to the side, forgotten and cold and alone, with not even another moon to confide in. He knows your...history with this famous idol and member of a famous band, BTS. You had refused to join your cousins to attend BTS’ fan meeting and Nunew was curious and having stumbled across your chat with your cousins, asked you why. You'd waved it off, citing a timetable clash, but Nunew knows your timetable like the back of his hand. You share a calendar and Nunew is always acutely aware of time and how it passes, counting down the days until he can snuggle into your open arms and forget everything but the soft rise and fall of your chest. Eventually you admitted that you and the member of BTS, Taehyung had been dating for long time, even before he debuted. You had been reluctant to disclose more than that, but Nunew wanted to know out of simple curiosity, and you've always had a hard time refusing him. Didn’t worked out, you'd described it. Changed his séxual orientation, you said. Nunew had accepted this and did not think about it again for months. You were his, and that was all he needed. Now it is all he can think about. What if you decide you actually prefer your first love? What if you decide to leave him and come out to the public as Taehyung's boyfriend, not as Nunew's husband? It weighs heavily on him. He notices how Taehyung was giving you longing glances, he wanted you back, Nunew could see it.

You wait for him to catch up and try to link your hands together. He pulls away, soft fingers slipping out of your grasp, and you frown. He only walks faster. It wouldn't be hard to catch up to him—each of your strides are basically two of his—but you let him go. When you head down into the car-park underground, you unlock the car before he gets there, letting him slide in and sit quietly until you arrive and claim the driver's seat. The car ride is heavy. The air is heavy. Nunew's heart is heavy as well. Absorbed in his own thoughts, he doesn't notice the things he usually does. He loves car rides with you, normally. The simple black sedan—an automatic with chrome wheels and seat warming options—is safe and comfortable and reminds Nunew of first dates and awkward kisses. Today he doesn't point out the pretty sunset, pale pink and orange with wispy chick-yellow clouds struck across the sky of foreign city. You've had a car for a while back in country. He wonders if Taehyung's ever been sitting where he is now, or in the back seat, where the windows are tinted black for privacy. He knows he's used the backseat for wandering hands and hungry mouths, and he's likely not the first. A sliver of doubt creeps into his mind, crawling low to avoid the searching floodlights. Has he ever had you, truly? Do you look at him and see something temporary, a placeholder, something to place in the back of a drawer and never touch again? Maybe this is why you are so hesitant to come out as a couple at first. Doing so would chain yourself to him, and any breakup would be more trouble than not. But you had proposed him, you said you want to marry him, but that was before you met Taehyung again. What if you wanted to break off the engagement and call off the wedding?

He fidgets with the sleeves of his sweater and looks down, the sleeves were indeed big for his arms.

You turn left and wait in a slip lane, using the time to gaze at him. You try his hand again, and this time, he allows your fingers to thread between his. He stares at your entwined hands, turning them over silently to trace the lines of your palm. He likes how they fit perfectly together, how his hand looks soft and delicate and rests comfortably in your warm palm. The car rolls forward, engine rumbling softly. You stroke his fingers with your thumb, brushing over his knuckles and the soft skin between them.

You squeeze his fingers, driving with one hand. You shouldn't—ten and two always, you know the rule— but Nunew's small hand tightens on yours when it starts to slip away, and he holds it tenderly in his lap as if it is a precious artefact made of pure gold. He cups both hands around it, protecting it from the elements. You have to keep your eyes on the road, following the white lines that flash by. Nunew's gaze on the side of your face is nervous and you can feel it boring into your temple.

He clutches your hand a little closer at your sigh.

The silence you leave after your words is intentional. He knows this, and it comforts him. Gives him a space to talk about what's troubling him.

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Once Taehyung got back to his hotel room, his legs gave up on him and tears welled up in his eyes as he remembered your interaction again. Ten years passed since you two have broken up and he still, he still suffered. Your (Y/H/C) hair still had that shine he loved and your smile was bigger than ever. His heart ached in pain and he licked his lips, surpassing the tears that welled up in his eyes. He tried but could not move away the picture from the place where he was standing at, almost hiding behind the wall of the booth and as he saw you, wrapping your hands around another guy’s waist. He broke down, tears fell down his eyes and he forgot how to breathe. Taehyung punched his chest, trying to make himself stop but he couldn’t and finally the truth he was denying hit him. He loved you, loved you still but you have moved on and he…his world stopped with you, leaving and he finally….finally gave up hoping to see you smile for him and calling his name. With shaky legs, Taehyung managed to move towards the wall and rest his head against it, wiping tears of his face, his five stages of grief began again. He finally let out his frustrations. Slamming his fist into the wall, a loud sob leaving him as he slid down the wall, collapsing onto the floor. He watched from the corner of his eye as Jimin approached him, instantly dropping to his knees and pulling his best friend into a hug.

Jimin couldn’t say anything, his heart racing as he only pulled his best friend closer to him, as Taehyung curled up into a ball, overflowing with tears. Jimin didn’t mention to Taehyung that some of the members already met you and your fiancé, when you were going inside your hotel. All he could do was hold the frantic friend, trying to reassure Taehyung it was okay. All Taehyung could do was let out choked sobs, gasping for air, as his mind whirred. His mistake leaving him alone in the arms of his best friend in a hotel room instead of with you.

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It was almost midnight, and Nunew was sleeping soundly on your hotel bed while, you were standing on the balcony, staring at the vast city. The city lights were blinding. You place your wine glass on the table and remove your cigarette from the pack. You light it and the smoke leaving your lips slowly consumes you, it took you to the past. The past were you were with your first love. First love? You look back inside your room and saw the most beautiful guy sleeping peacefully while covering the entire bed. It brought a smile on your face. He loves you without any doubt and you love him too without any question. But you know ‘he’ loves you too, ‘he’ was now out of that bubble. You could see the desperation and sadness in those almond shape eyes. You wished it was sooner, you wished for him to realize it sooner, as now you can’t feel those feelings which you once had. You know your eyes are empty when you look at him and it broke his heart. The heart which you once promised to protect at all cost. Does ten years really changed you so much or was it the effect of the heart break that broke your soul too.

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It been four years since you and Taehyung had been in relationship. Taehyung was basically attached to your hip. But one day, he knocks on your window as he had done hundreds of times before and you let him in knowing something was up almost immediately. He had a sad smile on his face, and that could only mean one thing.

You immediately engulfed him in your arms. Even though you were both young, you knew that this was great news. His dreams were slowly but surely starting to come true. But why then, did his smile not reach his eyes like they usually did.

After three years, you get a call from Taehyung suddenly in the middle of the day when you’re at seminar. You make up a silly excuse with your lecturer and run out in the hallway and make sure the coast is clear before answering the phone.

That was the first time in three years that you were that happy. And at that moment, you knew that his dreams were all finally coming true and you knew that you had to work towards yours too. This was truly, a new beginning for the both of you. Two years later, you call your boyfriend in the middle of the day this time. You weren’t expecting him to answer, but you smiled when you heard the phone click on his end.

One year later, you living your best life in Seoul. You were doing well in college, and you decided to major in physics. But the best part? You had your boyfriend back. Sure, you didn’t get to see him too incredibly often, because he was the Kim Taehyung of BTS. But, he still made as much time as he could for his elder boyfriend. Pretty soon after moving to Seoul, Taehyung slowly started shifting his things in your apartment and who were you to say anything. You love him so much. How could you not love him when he was so…perfect? Cloud nine. That’s where you were. You made six new best friends too ever since you moved to Seoul and you were always over at the dorm. They saw you as the perfect elder brother and you vowed to protect them from all the dangers in the world, but, you knew they were mature, they didn’t need any protection. But I think every good thing has an end, right?

You tried your best to be the best boyfriend and friend you could be for Taehyung and the boys. It was inevitable that he began to spend less and less time with you because they were becoming quite famous around the world. Sure, your relationship wasn’t public just yet, but people knew you were good friends with the boys and were considered family. Maybe you were too hopeful. Maybe you just...refused to see the signs. Or maybe you saw the signs and chose to ignore them. Or maybe, just maybe, you thought your love was strong enough. You loved Taehyung with all your heart, and adored the boys too. You knew, that Taehyung was your home, your everything. Your...safe place. So you didn’t think much of it when Taehyung stopped texting you as much as he used to. When your phone calls were reduced from hours to mere minutes. When he stopped making time for dates. When he didn’t say “I love you” as much. You just thought it was because of his schedule. He was always so busy, he claimed. So, with what little time you did have with him, you chose not to worry him about your own problems. Like how your job as substitute in high school was hard, like how your grandfather was getting sicker back home, like how...you felt lost sometimes. You didn’t want to add the stress that Taehyung had, he didn’t deserve that. So, you ignored the signs once again, as you chose to make dinner for Taehyung. You knew you didn’t have anything to worry about, because after the first time in months, Taehyung had messaged you to tell you he was coming over. He hadn’t been over in a long time, and you were excited to know that your boyfriend would be home with you in a soon. You quickly got to making his favorite food, and a lot of it, because you knew how much he loved to eat. When he rang the doorbell, you were a little sad that he didn’t do the cute little knock he always did when he was at your door. It was something he had been doing since he was knocking on your window back home. Maybe he just has a lot on his mind. Another sign, left ignored.