" I expected too much again, huh? " I said. I heard a voice from my behind saying , " I loved you. And this is the reason to which is why I'm letting you go " , his voice softened.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. But he went away. That winter night. Was the night that I couldn't ever forget. It wasn't only memorable but also one of the reason for my extreme sorrow.

"JOSHHHHHHH " -I called.

" Yes love? " Was his reply

Will it ever be the same? No. It wouldn't be the same. Even if I try to fix it. He was the one and only that made me feel actual love. He taught me the meaning of love.

- He was my first love.

He meant alot to me. I still couldn't forget all those days I spent with him. Every very single things reminds me of him. He was just perfect. Either the true example of perfectionist. He may had never acknowledged it. But peoples around him do knows how perfect he was. Putting his loved ones first all the time and showering them with love and affection.

" Ah- Will I ever be able to feel this moment again? "

".. No, it wouldn't be the same . "

I never knew. He would return to me in such a way that.. it will be me to reject him. I- .. I'm horrible, haa?

" Those memories of those days are surely an excellent memory. But it could never be the same after you break up once. Everything is changed. Now both of us are alcoholic? Who cares. None. I refuse to go home because there's no more home left for me to return. He goes home because his home was me. His home reminds him of me. I wonder how's he doing without me? Haa, no. I don't wonder those stuffs no more. I .. "

I- ..

I don't even know anymore. I completely lost interest. It's kind of that? Sheesh-

If I remember perfectly, it was a snowy winter night. He bought me flowers, and we were out on our perfect date. But suddenly, everything was wrong.

His big smile disappeared.

" What happened ? Anything the matter? " I asked.

" I- .. I understand it's hard for both of us. But we need to break up. You are still studying so you should be focusing on graduation first. You are even having a responsibility of a 6 y/o child who lost his parents from a very young age. And your brother is always away from your family. You know, you deserve better. Someone better than me. Someone who can take more good care of my princess, other than me. Someone who can make my princess happy, besides me. Moreover, someone who will there by her side, no matter what.. anybody but somebody other than me. I wish you nothing but extreme happiness, love. You can't cry over me. It's mere 589 days we spent together. I understand how much you value them. That's why I need you to respect my decision too, love. My princess won't cry right? "