I was sitting by the aisle when i saw a girl with her mother laughing like crazy cause she was mad

And i fell in love with her all of a sudden I don't know why maybe because I was liking the hamburger or maybe because she was the hamburger

I asked her out for a hamburger date

She said she doesn't like hamburger

*I killed her*

Her mother was staring at me while I was choking her she was smiling and laughing like a monster

Later I found out that she just wanted to eat something so....

5 years later

I met her mother while I was going to visit a mafia boss for my daily supply of weed and 50ml of coconut oil

I was sad and bald when I saw her mother once again

She was carrying out some dead bodies for her monthly food supply

She looked at me with a sudden discomfort on her face (and a bit of disgust because I was eating someone's legs without Schezwan sauce)

I invited her to make my life even more miserable

But when I saw her I felt something I never felt

because i was broke after the weed and oil purchase so I wanted someone to pay for me

And because 5 years ago I helped her with her dinner management I knew she'll help

She was starting to approach me when she stepped on a banana peal and fell on an umbrella the umbrella went inside her like quite literally

*She's dead now*

it's been 23.45 minutes since she's dead

Initially I was sad, but then I stole her purse and ate her body so...

Anyway...

Her family actually helped me a lot by dying actually, so I wanted to help her family with something

At least the rest of the family

Cause two of them are dead

So I asked my manager to find their house

He did

I went to their house

It was empty without them

Only 18 members were left

Because the right side of every family member was paralyzed

I was sad after hearing their story, but I don't want you all to get bored, so I'll just skip to the good part

Well... umm....

*I killed everyone*

well that was sad

just like your life because you are a piece of shit and no one loves you.

What you gonna do

Cry like a little baby

Haha! I'm just joking you are so pretty and perfect that I just stabbed my eyes so that I don't damage my eyes with your beauty

Be happy and don't eat your neighbor for dinner tonight

Everything will be alright just don't kill yourself

...Writer's note...

This novel is not based on real life incidents...

Well at least the oil part...

If you're taking it seriously

Stop it get Somé help and develop a good humour

I know the story is shit but it is what it is

Good nini have a great day