In this day and age sometimes relationship is the only thing that can give us comfort. Amidst the chaos around us and sometimes in us, we desire to have someone who will be there to accompany us and share with us everything. Be it joy, sadness, pain, loss and suffering.

But what if the one whom you expected to be there for you will just one day be gone? What will you do then?

Sometimes there are people who are physically present but mentally absent, how would you react or respond when this happens?

It was what happened to me.

I was 21 years old then, in the peak of my youth. Feeding my passion and enjoying my life to the fullest.

I was working as a bank teller in the morning and I partied at clubs during the night.

I was young and wild. I was irresponsible.

I had a boyfriend. A simple minded guy but I didn't care. I was so full of lust and passion, during that time, all I care about is to party and get laid.

My boyfriend that time was always busy, he was into drugs and was selling it as well, he won't text me nor call me throughout the day but I didn't care as long as when I need him to please me in bed, he will come.

Our relationship that is full of passion lasted for over a year until one day I found out I was pregnant. I was scared upon hearing from the doctor the result of my check up.

How could this be? Why me? Why did you allow this to happen to me, God when there are people who are willing but can't even have a child? How will I survive this? I am not yet ready. These questions flooded my head. I wanted to cry but there were no tears. I felt numb. Shock is really an understatement to describe what I feel that time. I was also furious.

I went home absent mindedly. I really didn't know what to do. It's too late to regret. I feel like I was going crazy.

With all the those thoughts bugging me, I decided to get rid of the child. I thought of killing the baby inside my womb.

I wasn't ready to be a mother. I still want to enjoy my youth. How can I let it go so suddenly when I am in the peak of it?

I decided to buy a medicine and overdose myself to get rid of the thing inside my belly. Without telling my then boyfriend about the situation yet, I decided to take matters into my hand and clean up the mess I created.

But, I can't. I wasn't able to. I slumped on the floor crying my heart out. I am not a killer. I don't want to kill the inoccent child just because I made a mistake and I didn't want it. With all these realization, I cried until there's no tears left for me to shed. Until I fell asleep hiding under my bed.

In the morning when I woke up, I decided to call my boyfriend and talked to him. Informed him about the situation but as I was expecting he also told me to get rid of the child. That he wasn't ready and he won't be able to be with me for long.

I wasn't surprised when he said those things. How can a relationship founded and built in lust become a reliable one?

Then I decided to leave. I resigned from work, packed my bag and left my house. I flew to a different city. Looking forward to a new life.

I arrived at L City, since it was my first time to be away I decided to meet a Facebook friend who helped me ssettle. I agreed to live with him in a small space.He helped me in many ways and I lived with him for free. At first it was good, I didn't think it was a crazy idea since I didn't expect he was into me.

He was a professor in a university. A cool smart guy. But he wasn't really my type. He was just considered my friend.

As days go by, I noticed his approach to me has changed. It felt like he was being too intimate. Holding me, hugging me and even really taking care of everything that I need from the water I should use for my shower to the kind of food that I should eat. And it started to feel awkward.

One day when I was sleeping, I noticed something heavy pinning me down on the bed, when I opened my eyes I saw him. He was a little drunk. I didn't know what to do, my heart was beating fast because of fear. What if he will molest me? what if he will force me? These questions crossed my mind.

I pushed him away and got up suddenly. I started packing my things and decided to leave the place. But where will I go? I am not from here. I don't know this place.

I am sorry, he said. I didn't mean to do it. Angela, I like you. I can be the father of your baby. I am willing to. Those are the words he said.

But I don't like you. I just consider you as my friend that's why I trusted you. - I answered.

I was still shivering. That man, yes I considered him my friend but you know what, it was my first time meeting him when I got to L City. He was just my Facebook friend. I didn't know him in person.

He remained quiet but after a while he left but reminded me to get a good rest and forget what happened that night.

I wasn't able to sleep after. I got on Facebook. Searched for friends who lives close by. I found one. Somebody who was from the same province as me.

I messaged him. Sweet talked him. I was beautiful, I was young and interesting. I lured the guy. I asked him if he could take me in, made up stories as to why I need his help and exaggerated my situation.

That province dude was a good guy, I felt bad that I abused his kindness.

He took me in. We lived together for 8 whole months. He cared for me as if I was his wife.

One day during my second month of pregnancy, as my stomach wasn't really that obvious yet, I decided to look for a job. I can work while pregnant. Besides, I have a degree and my work experience was good.

I applied as a secretary to a construction company and I got accepted.

My boss was in his mid 40's that time.

During my first day, my boss invited me to have lunch together, he also said he will have a meeting with a client. Since I was his secretary, I didn't think much. I went with him.

We had lunch together but there was no client and there was no meeting. Still, I didn't think somethings amiss.

On our way back to the office, he talked a lot about his life, his marriage, his business and how much money he has.

I just listened to him talk and talk and talk. Smiled a little and acted polite, of course he was my boss, I need to leave a good impression.

When suddenly he held my hand, would you want to be my woman?