Wednesday, July 22, 2020. It's 10 to 17 minutes. Today is a cloudy day with a wind blowing. I'm sitting on a swing with a coffee. M. The song was played as soon as the radio was turned on,

The old days, you forget what you're saying.

He is the sight of the soul , what he forgets

Come on, come on, come on, come on.

I'll talk about the sorrow of happiness, the joy of life.

I remember hearing the song, an old memory of my life. The real old memory is a strange thing to laugh at, to make someone laugh, to bury someone and to hold someone in that memory. That makes people change. Just like i remember, I didn't forget to change my old memories. Today I'm also a little bit changed by the word 'Crush'. Crush this leaves me a lot of side effects. Some of them are:

v The lack of contact with someone was a little less.

v I've always been immersed in THE PUBG game.

v If you have a chance, you can talk to others like his friends or his friends. I'd rather be immersed in the book than it is.

v I stopped sharing the filings with someone.

v there were many more.

But some good effects also leave. Everyone has such a lot of memories. If you who are reading this life story want me to tell me about your life story, don't you mind? I'm very interested in such a real story.

So let's go to our story without talking too much. My real story , side EFFECTS of Crush , started today (3) years ago. I saw him for the first time that day. I know why he's so good. What we all call love AT FIRST SIGHT. Then it was the story of us. I always sat in the doorway to see him the day I first saw him. I'd take a news in his father's bag. But one day my brother found out he was my brother's friend and classmate.

So I'm looking for a year (2017) through my brother. But I never let my brother know that I liked him so much.

In 2018 I got to Class VIII and my Crush class went up to class 9. This 2018 was the happiest year for me. This time I have two best friends for me, Sumaya and Eti K Bandubi. And some work for my Crush as a happy little stoic.

By 2017 - 2018 I tried to send my CRUSH a lot of FRIEND REQUEST but he had to stop the FRIEND REQUEST SYSTEM. That's why he never had a chance to talk to him on Facebook. But there was never a day i checked his FACEBOOK PROFILE. I'd save a lot of pictures of him to see him.

So I'd always sit in darja for 2017 to see him in 2018.

My Crush BOY is pretty good. So there are a lot of girls behind him. One day While I was sitting at the exam hall, my CRUSH BOY's CLASSMATE GIRLS started discussing him. I'm listening with my attention. They were discussing that he was very intelligent and beautiful. One of the conversations said he liked my Crush. Immediately another girl said she liked him. Another added that he liked her too and the fight broke out between the three at the EXAM HALL.

So I never let the class open its doors in 2018. I would have opened the door with some reason. Because when we were in class, they would have won their class on my crush with a string. Many of the people who were asking me why I was sitting in the front seat of the door. Why would I look at the door so much? I'd love to sit in the seat and see the crush. But I never looked at the crush. He didn't know how to look.

I got another chance in 2018 to see him well. And that's the opportunity. I'm walking around the crush in Picnic. She looked so beautiful that day. Wearing a blue shirt.

One day I asked my brother if Rifat bhai has gf.

Oh sorry Rifat is my crush. With whom this story is about .

So my brother said, "What do you do knowing if Rifat has gf?" I said in fear that my brother Sumaya likes Rifat Bhai. Then he says, "Rifat has gf." It was hard to hear this. Then wait for when the breakup will be done. That's how 2018 went.

2019 was a more spectacular year. My friend said one day that they should go to his Facebook idea. So I go and see Rifat Bhai accepts his friend's request. I am happy and self-sufficient. I was so happy i texted him immediately.

I: Asalamualikum

Rifat: Walikum Salam

I' actually gave you a friend request for a reason.

Rifat: What's the reason?

Then I was ready to tell him that I liked him. Then I'm talking to my bandhis. I'm talking to him most of the time with my Bandubir ID. So Rifat Bhai thinks it's talking to Anor but I was talking to Anor with iti's id.

I: Actually one of my spells has been liked by you for three years but couldn't tell you boldly.

Rifat: What is your name?

I'm not saying my name is Saira. Because if I had told him my name, he would have been so snively that I was the sister of the honor friend. He came to our house many times and he was a bit of a shock to me. If he told my brother about me, I wouldn't have said my name. He must have understood that the name was a lie.

I: Syra. So do you have gf?

Rifat: No.

I've been talking like this for a long time. I know what Honor likes. I used to tell Anna what kind of girl you like.

So, Rifat Bhai, i'll get angry one day. Because we used to talk to him together. Rifat Bhai would almost be confused. But that day was a bit of a rage. I mean, he told me in iti's ID that if I don't talk to Honor with my ID, he won't talk to me anymore. So I spoke with another ID of iti but it also understood that it was a fake ID. So he said again, "I'll talk to him with my real id." So I gave my ID this time. I'm not being introduced. He was able to get me out of here. So the next day I called Him a brother.

Rifat: You made crush brother. He said something like that.

I'm glad I heard this and I didn't say it. Honor is called crush.

After talking like this, it's 2020. One day my bandwashi ended up on a plane. He told Rifat that you'd be in front of this school at 3:30. Then he brought me to the school to play the racquet. I could have been a little excited about it. At 3:30, Rifat came with his friend. I didn't look at him properly because I was feel so shy . But From a distance I was looking at it.

That's how I told him one day I like you. Think of your answer. Rifat Bhai said he'd say it at the end of S.S.C. So the honor test ended with a saying, "No." I blocked him again. Because I felt like I was bothering anna with a message. So I did not know why Rifat was not brother' inthes.

One day I wanted to hear the reason. So I said , "I salute him , and I say , " Why not answer the honour ? "

Rifat Bhai then said he was breakup a few days ago. And don't think honor ingout with my brother.

He loved Honor EX GF. I told him so much that you and my brother's friendship would not be lost. Then he said, "Well, we know who it is, and then we will see if we can answer yes or whatever."

After talking about it for a long time, he says one day i miss your mom. I said why would i miss my mother? Rifat bhai laughed and said, "No, I like to eat your mommy's noodles, so I miss the meal." After talking about it for so long, he made me unfriend. So I said you don't have to answer again. It was my fault that I told you I liked you. He said it was not wrong, it was useless. And I forgot.

Then I blocked it again. But how long can the pre-man be blocked? I've been sitting here like him for three years. How do I leave at the time? So I blocked the un. But he blocked me.

A few days ago I opened a new ID to talk to him.

I've corrected the misunderstanding again. I told him a few days ago, I thought I didn't like it, so I didn't have the answer. He said no, nothing crazy. He said he was crazy. I know how crazy it was. I've asked him a lot of times for his pic. I'm not talking to him anymore.

I didn't like him for getting anything. It was a long time. I've been away from this time. It was a pre-emptive move. Then three years might be a short time.

The real situation is that people are very much in a state of shock. I've changed, too, and no more filings for him. Is this the result of my change or is it the result of his ignore? I don't know. But if he hadn't been more than ignore, i'd probably have a different story.

What I'm learning from here is: moving forward from nothing to the next. Because whoever is going to be there, he doesn't have to ask. Or he has to endure the ignore.

now I don't want to fall in love anymore . this memory is really Hart me . I'm afraid to fall in love .