“This house is allowed to contain the Nkomo tribe only. Everyone who is not of this surname should move out of my father’s house.” My aunt said this boldly in a family meeting. She only put it that way because she didn’t want to say my name out loud! I was the only one who wasn’t a Nkomo. My mom and dad had separated when I was in grade 4 and my dad wanted nothing to do with me. I tried asking my mom why but she never gave me a straight answer. She was always drunk! “This clearly means your children will have to leave this house aswell, we all know that they’re not Nkomos. The reason why they use out father’s surname is because you don’t know who their fathers are!” My uncle spat in disgust as he responded to my aunt. She was my mother’s younger sister, but she clearly despised my mom. It is said that since they were kids they never loved each other.

My uncle was always fair. He was the eldest and everyone listened to him. His word was final. My aunt just sat there silently. What my uncle had said really put her in her place. The meeting was dismissed. But deep down I knew there was no place for me here. My mother had left the country and went to Botswana when I was in grade 5, eight years ago and no one has ever heard from her. I knew that this was going to be a temporary solution because my uncle stayed in Beitbridge border town. He had asked me to come stay with his family but I’d refused because his wife hated me too. She was very close to my aunt and they had made it a point to make my life a living hell. I’d passed my O level with flying colors but because I owed fees at my school they couldn’t give me my results until I had cleared off the bill.

I had started doing odd jobs for people and would pay my fees little by little i was only left with a small amount to finish they I would get my results then my life will start from there. I cooked super and served everyone. They all ate and I cleaned the dishes. I took my blankets and rolled myself in the sofa. “Nyarai, Nyarai” someone whispered my name and I opened my eyes to see my uncle. “Follow me”, he said. I woke up and followed him outside. It was still dark. “Take the gate keys, you’ll have to lock up the gate”, he said loudly. I did as such. He drove his car to the gate then he parked. He gave me two hundred dollars. “Take this money and go pay your fees and get your results. Go to mbuya Marufu and ask to call me. I’ll try to find a job for you out of town so you can get out of this hell hole. For now be strong my (muzukuru) niece”. He opened the door and I hoped off opened the gate and he left. I locked the gate and went back. I hid my money under one of the stones under the mango tree. I went inside to find my aunt waiting by the door. “Where is it, where did you put it?”, she said. Running her hands everywhere in my body searching me even inside my underwear. She huffed in disappointment since she didn’t find anything. I went back to sleep and soon my alarm went off.

I woke up did all the chores, took a bath and left. I had had too many thoughts in the morning. I didn’t want to stay here anymore! I was tired. I took my two hundred dollar note and went to another suburb. I went to the shops where people hung posters of rooms for rental. I saw the cheapest I could find for twenty dollar per month. I quickly called the number and an elderly woman responded. She gave me directions and I went there.

I reached the address and it was a small beautiful house. The old lady welcomed me. We went inside her house and she showed me the room. It was small and beautiful and I would be using my own door and the outside bathroom. I asked to pay atleast for five months she didn’t refuse but she wrote me a receipt insisting that she is now old and she quickly forgets things. I thanked her and left. I went back home and found my aunt furious that lunch wasn’t prepared yet. “Iwe Nyarai, how many times have I told you to prepare lunch on time. Izvezvi vana varikuchema nenzara! (Now kids are crying of hunger)” I was really tired honestly. I was tired of everyone treating me like I was a nobody. Yes I was! But I deserve some love and respect! So I responded without care knowing very well that this is my last day here. “And who’s fault is it? Who’s children are even crying! As far as im concerned I don’t have a child and since I don’t have a child. It’s not My responsibility to monitor who ate and who didn’t”. The look on her face! I loved it, it was priceless. I said all that while I stormed past her to the bedroom. I took my mother’s suitcase and her blankets. I packed my clothes and left.

I told myself im starting my new life and I don’t want anything or anyone holding me back. I vowed never to look back again! I went to my new place and I put my things there,locked the door and left. I went into town to my cousin’s workplace. Her face lit up the moment she saw me. “Your aunt has told everyone in the family that you hit her and left”, I laughed so hard “Well if that’s what she wants then it’s fine”. I wasn’t going to try and tell people my side of the story. Everyone knew she lied a lot and was very dramatic. “How are you though?” She asked. “Im okay, I got myself a place to rent.” Shock was evident in her eyes. “Nyari how will you pay rent?” She asked. “I already paid for five months, I hope by then I would have found something to do” I said.

“Speaking of that, some lady is looking for someone to help her clean her new house. She bought a house with property inside but she doesn’t want some of the things. So she wants someone to help her clean the place. She will give you some of the property instead. She is low on cash...” “I want the job” I cut her before she finished her statement. “Nyari….” I cut her again before she could finish “I want it Lee. Atleast I’ll have something to do while I figure out what I want to do with my life” I said. She didn’t hesitate, she closed her spaza and we left. We boarded a kombi to Khumalo where the lady was. She showed me around the house. It was clearly huge and too many things, clothes,old sofas, etc. I told her I’ll come start tomorrow morning and just like that my breakthrough began.