dear husband :

When will you come back to me?.

I know you are gone to make your duty for your country...

But how about me?... And the little soul you left it inside me?... Did you forget your duty about us... You know how much I suffer every day...

I get scared in every news I can't sleep at night because I missed your breath beside me... I really need you there when I cry in my lonely nights... The days feel like years when I'm alone... When You were Gone the pieces of my heart are Missing you....all the clothes you left it Smells just like you... I remember all the words I need to hear to make me get through the day and make it okay... I miss you... Do you see how much I need you right now...

You are protecting people you are like a hero to them...

But what about me.? . How I supposed to protect myself without you... I know I should be a strong mother for our child... But there is so much pressure upon my shoulder... Sometimes I lose control of myself when I imagined you in front of me... Are you really just an imagination?... Was everything that happened between us is just a dream? ... But if it's really a dream then why I don't want to wake up... Everything reminds me of you...

You know the tree that we planted together. It's getting big now. I water it every day and with every single drop of water, my tears flowed over... The tree is grown with my tears... And you haven't returned yet... Everything in this house is Missing you... .why are you so cold-hearted person..please don't leave me alone...I'm begging you...

Have mercy on me... Why did you marry me if you are planning to leave me? Why did you make me love you and get pregnant in your child...just Why..?

Many questions inside my head and I want to tell you a lot of things ...

I do not regret it that I love you... And I will never love anyone but you in my whole life.. and I will love you a thousand times again if I had the chance...because we were made for each other...

I love you... please come back to me soon or I will go to you.. when our son gets older and can depend on himself...

I promise you that I will raise him very well and never makes him forget you... He will be a great man just like you...

And When the sun is going to rise again. and will be no more wars and no more pain... And the children will play again...

I will come to you, my love... Because I know the dead will never come back to life again...😔

And when I will see you I will be with you forever and will never leave your arms again...

Pain becomes poetry

so we may heal the wounds

and soften the scars... That's why I wrote this even though you will never receive it 😔

I'm Not belonging

like a transplant rejected by a body

like a seed sowed in the wrong soil

like a scattered paper flying aimlessly

like a sun eclipsed by the moon endlessly

like a chapter never meant to be in a book

like a silent tornado imprisoned in body cells

like a flower hiding in the lowest of dream bushes

like a dreamer who stopped dreaming turning insomniac

like a good cartoon character stuck in the tower of evil

like jasmine which growth ceased murdered by its farmer!

Not Belonging........

like a scholar provoking hate, hostility and bloodshed

like a liar feigning the truth painting a made up sketch

like a made-up sketch drawn from sarcastically special colours

like colours made special from the bright redness of flesh

like colours made special from the bright greenness of a paper

like the beds of rebellions which always get eternal sleep-ins!

like a childhood painting of peace vanished in the whirls of war

like an orphan who never got to know a heart, home or safety

and like a comma patient who woke years elapsed to a Shock!

Not belonging to hell! he screamed! Get me Back to my comma!

this poem I wrote it 2 years ago when I lost everything I lost where I belong

every single person appeared in my life cheated me in a very awful way

but here I'm today

strong to fight no matter how much I pay

I still find my way

to the happiest ending, I may wait for so long...but I'm sure that I will get it somehow and some way...

*even if it's against my well

I should find my happiness in any possible way.....

I will run and climb the highest mountain.

hahaha, who am I fooling anyway there nothing called "happy ending or happy life"

it's all just a big lie they lied to us to not make us lose our faith...

life is not snow withe or Cinderella story who will find her prince in the end...

for me, life is just a forced marriage who won't let me find my happiness the person who won't let me live anyway. living my life just like a s*x machine, I'm NOT

I have a soul and I have a heart but life is so hard 😔*

If I try to love someone truly in my heart and he loves me back

this someone will go Maybe die or maybe who knows...

I'm not telling you this to make hate life or lose hope No, I'm just telling that this is my awful life without him

because I lost my child.... the only thing was keeping me still breathing I lost it

and I don't want to have a child with this man even if he forced me or hit me thousands of time...

Romeo this massage is for you: come back to save me now how could you left me for someone else...

I'm still dreaming of my happy ending with you ...