Niyati

I was supposed to be married by now.

By this time, I should've been surrounded by family, drenched in sindoor and laughter, my hands clasped in the man I thought would be mine forever. Instead, I'm here. Sitting alone in a bar I don't even recognize, the bitter taste of alcohol clinging to my tongue and betrayal coursing through my veins like venom.

The bangles on my wrists jingle with every movement, a cruel reminder of what today was supposed to be. My mother's red wedding saree feels heavier than ever. Each thread, each sequin, now stitched with pain instead of love.

I've never drunk alcohol before. Not even a sip. But today-today I need it. I need something, anything, to dull this sharp, tearing ache in my chest. I thought I'd be smiling with my husband by now, stepping into a new life. Instead, I'm crumbling alone, humiliated and abandoned.

Four years. That's how long I gave him.

Four long, precious years of my life. My heart, my trust, my secrets, my loyalty. Every inch of myself, I gave to Raj. And today-on the day that was supposed to be our beginning-I find out he never even loved me.

Not once. Not even a little.

I don't understand how that's possible. I don't understand how someone can fake it for so long. He knew me better than anyone. He knew about my fear of the dark, the way I talk to myself when I cook, how I hum under my breath when I'm nervous. I gave him the keys to my soul.

And still, I wasn't enough.

Now I sit here, drowning my heartbreak in some cheap liquor I can barely pronounce, mascara streaking down my face, lipstick smeared, hair tangled from the wind and my own restless hands.

The music in the bar is soft, jazzy, painfully out of place with the chaos in my mind. The lighting is low, and the world outside the window is dark, blurred by tears I've long stopped trying to wipe away.

"Hey! Why are you drinking so much?" a voice breaks into my haze, cutting through the murky fog in my head.

I blink slowly and turn my head. The bartender who had been serving me earlier is gone, and now there's someone new. Younger. Sharper. Softer. His eyes are a strange shade of warm brown, his smile teasing and oddly...kind.

If I weren't spiraling into emotional destruction, I might've thought he was cute. Maybe even charming. He had the kind of face that made you pause-a little bit of mischief, a little bit of soul.

"Hey, pretty lady," he continues with a smirk. "Did you elope from your wedding?"

I almost laugh. Almost.

Pretty?

I glance down at myself. The red saree clings to my body like a ghost. The gold jewelry feels cold against my skin. My eyeliner is probably smudged beyond repair, my lipstick faded, and I know I must look like a wreck. A bride without a groom. A heartbreak dressed in tradition.

Oh, right.

I was at the mandap about an hour ago.

Standing there like a fool, hands folded, heart full of hope. Waiting for Raj to arrive. Waiting for a dream that never came true.

Instead, I was told he had left.

Just... left.

Apparently, he chose someone else. A model. Someone vibrant and bold and pregnant. Pregnant with his child.

And me?

I was just the girl who dressed too modestly. Who didn't know how to contour her cheeks or flirt like the women in magazines. According to him, I looked like an aunty. Someone who wouldn't suit his lifestyle. Someone who didn't match his brand.

That was his reason. His serious reason for abandoning me at the mandap.

And yet, a part of me still defends him.

"He had a serious reason," I mumble to myself. "She's pregnant. She needs him."

"Hey, are you okay?" the bartender's voice turns softer now, his teasing gone.

Am I okay?

What a strange question. What does 'okay' even mean anymore?

I pick up my glass and drain the last of the drink. The burn in my throat barely registers. It's nothing compared to the blaze inside my chest. My heart feels like it's being torn apart with bare hands, slowly, mercilessly.

"I was loyal," I whisper to the empty air. "For four damn years. I gave him everything."

My vision blurs as memories flash before my eyes-late-night calls, secret letters, the way he used to look at me like I was his universe. I believed every word. Every lie.

And yet he felt... nothing?

How?

How can someone love a street kitten after five minutes of petting it and still not love a girl after four years of knowing her soul?

I push off the bar stool, gripping the bottle with shaky fingers. My saree drags across the floor, the weight of it threatening to pull me down. My anklets chime with every unsteady step.

"Ma'am!" the bartender calls out. "Wait! You haven't paid the bill!"

I pause, dazed. "I... I don't have any money."

He frowns, about to protest, but I tug off a ring from my finger and slide it across the counter.

"Take this," I say. "It's real. I promise. Just... don't give it away. I'll come back for it. I'll... I'll pay you later. Please."

He studies me for a second, his eyes searching mine. Then he nods.

I don't wait to say thank you.

---

The night air bites at my skin as I walk toward Marine Drive. My heels click against the pavement, my steps unsteady. I don't know why I'm going there. Maybe I hoped he'd be there. Maybe I just needed somewhere to fall apart.

And somehow-by some twisted miracle-he is.

Raj.

Sitting on the rocks, staring at the sea like it holds all his answers. His shoulders are slumped, his face unreadable, his hands tangled in his hair.

Why is he sad? Is she gone already? Did she lose the baby? Or is he just now realizing that actions have consequences?

I want him to look at me.

To say something. Anything.

But he doesn't even know I'm here.

A fresh wave of pain crashes over me, sharp and cold. My heart clenches as I bring the bottle to my lips again and take a long, bitter gulp.

And then the thought comes. Quiet. Dangerous.

Maybe he left because I wouldn't let him touch me. Maybe if I'd just... given in. Maybe he would've stayed.

If I offer that to him now-my body-would he come back?

Would he love me then?

I close my eyes and laugh bitterly.

It's just virginity, right? What is that compared to love? Compared to keeping him?

I could give him that. I could give him everything. I already have, haven't I?

He is my everything.

And if I have to break the last piece of myself to make him stay... then maybe I will.

"Sometimes, healing feels more painful than the heartbreak itself - because it forces you to remember what you've tried so hard to forget."

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Niyati

"It wasn't the alcohol that made me reckless. It was the freedom of not feeling... just for one night."

I was wasted.

For the first time in my life, I had alcohol. Before tonight, I used to think drinking was a sin. A crime. Something people did when they had no self-respect left. But now... now I get it.

Now I understand why someone would want to drown in a bitter liquid that burns your throat and numbs your soul. Because tonight, my heart has been shattered into pieces so small, I'm not sure I can ever put them back together.

Raj left me. He didn't just leave me-he abandoned me at the mandap, in front of hundreds of eyes, in the middle of sacred rituals. One moment I was ready to start forever with him, and the next, I was standing there, alone... in silence.

It wasn't just the abandonment. It was the reason he gave that pierced deeper than any blade.

"I never loved you."

Those four words ripped through me like fire through dry leaves. Four years... four entire years, I gave him everything-my love, my trust, my soul. And he didn't love me? Not even once?

How was I supposed to handle that?

I staggered my way to Marine Drive, half-dragging my saree, the red and gold fabric soaked with ocean breeze and broken dreams. My jewelry jingled with each step, echoing like cruel reminders of the wedding that never was. My vision was blurred, not sure whether it was the alcohol or the tears-or maybe both.

But when I saw him-Raj-sitting there, staring up at the sky like the world had broken him too, something inside me cracked even deeper.

Why did he look so lost?

Wasn't he the one who left me? The one who told me I looked like an 'aunty'? The one who walked away for a model who was supposedly pregnant with his child?

Why did he look like he was the one betrayed?

Suddenly, something took over me. Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe it was heartbreak. Maybe it was just love-twisted and pathetic love-but I wanted to feel him one last time.

I wanted him to see what he was about to lose forever.

I reached him from behind, grabbed his collar, and spun him around. His eyes widened in shock as I leaned in and touched my lips to his. My first kiss. It was clumsy, unskilled... but honest.

I didn't know what to do next. I just waited. Waited for him to take control, to hold me, to tell me he still felt something.

But instead, he tried to pull away.

My heart dropped.

No, please... not again.

Desperate, I grabbed his hands and placed them on my waist. His touch was warm. It made me shiver, made me melt. I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss.

"I love you," I whispered in between the kiss.

And then... he responded.

His grip tightened. His lips moved in sync with mine, hungry, fierce, passionate. Like he wanted to forget the world. Like, for a moment, I wasn't someone he didn't love-but someone he needed.

I lost myself in that kiss. My fingers slid into his hair, and I kissed him like I was starving, like I was drowning and he was my only breath. Every fiber of my being screamed that this was right-that this was love.

When he finally pulled back to let me breathe, I whispered, broken and breathless, "I love you, Raj. I really do."

And just like that... he froze.

His eyes lost the fire. His hands dropped. I could feel the moment slipping away again, like sand through my fingers.

Panic bloomed in my chest.

No. Please, no.

I grabbed his face with trembling hands. "What happened? Don't stop now. You want this, right? I-I won't back out this time."

His brows furrowed, but I kept speaking, desperate to stop the distance that was creeping in again.

"You think I'll change my mind like before? I won't. I promise. I'm ready... I'm ready to give you everything. You can have your way with me."

I bit my lip, trying to hold back tears.

"I know this is what you've always wanted... and I was the one who kept saying no. But I'm not saying no now. Please, just don't leave me again."

My voice broke, and my throat burned. Not from the alcohol this time-but from the fear of losing him for good.

"You can do anything, Raj. Anything. Just don't walk away from me again."

I couldn't even look at him properly. I felt so exposed, like I was standing in the middle of a battlefield with no armor, begging to be spared.

Was I pathetic? Maybe. But love does that to people. It reduces you to your knees, makes you beg for things you once believed were beneath you.

I wiped my face and took a shaky breath. Then, with trembling fingers, I reached for the pin holding my saree in place over my chest. I unclipped it, letting the cloth fall, revealing my vulnerability in the most literal way.

And yet... his reaction stunned me.

He stepped forward-slowly-and held the saree's edge. Gently, he wrapped it around me again, covering me with quiet precision. I looked up at him, confused and broken.

"Why?" I whispered. "Why are you covering me now? There's no point."

"Utter one more word," he said coldly, "and you'll regret it."

His voice wasn't the same as the one I'd known over the years. It wasn't irritated or cruel. It was deep. Quiet. Almost... pained. But firm. So damn firm.

And then, without warning, he pulled me into his arms. Tight.

His warmth enveloped me completely, and something about the way he held me made the pain crack just a little. I shut my eyes and let myself melt into him. His scent, his heartbeat, his breath near my ear-it drowned out everything else.

For the first time in hours, my heart wasn't screaming.

I didn't even realize when sleep came over me. But I slept. In his arms.

And when I woke up... I wasn't in his arms anymore.

I blinked.

I was lying on a soft bed in a room I didn't recognize. The morning light filtered through thin curtains. The ache in my heart returned like an old friend.

Where was I?

And more importantly...

Where was Raj?

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