One morning when everything went wrong…

We were sleeping beside each other when we hear a loud bang and scream that morning just to realize…. They were fighting about something I don’t understand… He ran inside our room and closed the door,she followed.. Threatening him to kill herself if he won’t open the door… So he did open the door..we were staring at them confused and shock… She told us to get ready for school so we did.. That was the first time I saw them argue….

At that time my father is about to go another country,Russia.. I did know anything at all I just know that they’re fighting,nothing else cause when my father bid his bye to me and my mom,she didn’t show any emotion at all… After few months,my mom also went to Malaysia and me and my two brothers are left with our grandparents.

After 2 years of my father being away from home he decided to come back for vacation and also to prepare for his departure to Canada in 2 months..

I was 10 at that time when that happened and now I’m 16 it took me 6 years to realize what they were arguing about that morning when I caught him myself. I went downstairs,to my old room to look for old clothes of mine and I was listening to music,wearing my headphones when I suddenly heard voices,at first I paid no mind about it. Then I heard it again,I removed my headphones and listen. then it hit me,my father is supposed to be alone in that room. I ran upstairs without alarming my father that someone was next room. I saw my brother and our older cousin in the living room,

“Dad is with someone downstairs?!”

“We know” said by my brother

“And no one told me?”

As I said that no one said anything and I went straight to my room..and that time I realized that I was the only one who didn’t know that my father is cheating…..

I hide in my room processing what just happened..

They knew yet no one told me?

Why? For my own good? For me to not hate him?

I couldn’t understand nor do I find answers to this questions..

My birthday is approaching, before that day come and after I discover my fathers affair, I start to not let my feelings out nor do I let other people know or open the bottle I closed..not even my mom.

When they asked if I knew the affair I keep quiet..not answering their question,cause why would you I even ask? I’m living in the same roof as him..

I started to avoid my father in the most not obvious way. Surely what he thinks is that I was just shy just it’s been 2 years when we physically saw each other.

“Where’s Lee?”

“In her room” my brother replied

“Oh okay” father said