"Under the Command of the Heart"

Sergeant Benjamin Santiago. Thirty-five years old. Six foot three. Two hundred and twenty pounds.

I still don't know how I ended up in that room. Once again, I did something stupid. I don't know why I didn't just ignore that guy drinking alone at the bar.

It wasn't normal for someone that beautiful to spend the whole night drinking by himself in a bar that was always packed with people looking for company, men and women both. I watched him until a woman approached him. She was sexy as hell, and even though I'm not attracted to women, I could admit she was beautiful.

I saw by his posture that he wasn't comfortable with the conversation, but she used all her charm and managed to get him to drink a little from her glass.

She walked away, and soon after I realized he seemed slower. In my line of work, I knew women drugged men too, either to rob them or to get a night of pleasure out of them.

I decided to go over to the bar. If what I suspected was true, it turned out to be the worst decision of my life. I moved in and took the empty space between him and another customer. When he looked at me, I thought I might drown in the blue of his eyes. With that unshaved beard and the black cap shadowing part of his face, I couldn't really see his hair.

He waved for the bartender to bring him another drink.

The man served him right away, and I noticed he was having trouble holding the glass.

"Hey. Are you alone?" I asked, making him face me.

"Yeah." The answer was short and barely came out.

"Man, I think you need some fresh air. Want to step outside for a minute?"

"Man, if you're looking for company, I'm not gay," he said without looking at me.

His declaration didn't even surprise me. Everything about him suggested he was one hundred percent straight.

"Neither am I. I just think you're not okay. Wouldn't it be better to get some air and see if you feel better?"

I spoke close to his ear.

"I..."

His voice didn't even finish the word.

I called the guy behind the bar, pulled out my card, paid both his tab and mine, and left the bar with him. The man was big, but I was bigger.

I held him by the waist and set his arm over my neck to make it easier to walk with him. I could smell his woodsy cologne mixed with the alcohol on him.

"Man, where do you live?"

He looked back at me with those blue eyes.

"I... don't... know," he murmured, his eyes closed.

"Fuck... I'm really screwed."

I thought for a moment and had another idea: take him to a small hotel nearby. I wasn't going to leave the guy out in the middle of the street, where anyone could rob him.

Carefully, I led him to a taxi waiting close by. At the hotel reception, I asked for a simple room. I didn't know why I was doing it. I didn't even know who this guy was. I could have left him there and gone home. Then, all of a sudden, he started smelling my neck.

I had barely shut the door when he surprised me, grabbing me hard and shoving me against it. He pulled off his cap and pinned me there with force.

His breathing was fast. His pupils were blown wide. I tried to free myself from those big hands, but then he started scenting me, and my lower half began to wake up. It wasn't easy to resist that man.

I still tried to push him away, but I couldn't, and I didn't try very hard once his thin, soft lips covered mine in a devastating kiss, the kind I hadn't felt in a long time. He was acting in a way he couldn't control. Maybe it was the effect of whatever that woman had put in his drink.

His large hands pulled me by the back of the neck, dragging my body against his. We were on fire. His hands slid down to my waist, then to my ass, and I let out a groan that his mouth swallowed.

"What the fuck..."

I groaned against his ear.

All I could hear were the sounds coming from his mouth. Somehow we ended up against the couch. He started stripping off his clothes, and I stripped off mine, neither of us taking our eyes off the other. For a minute he stared at me like a beast looking at its prey. That was exactly how I felt. My gaze dropped straight to what stood in front of me. He really was big, but I'm not the kind of man who runs from anything.

We came together again, desperate this time. I could feel he was a little lost, but I knew I'd have the pleasure of helping him.

"I... I..." he tried to say.

His voice came out rough, and in that moment I was sure he didn't know how to act with me. I began guiding him toward the bed. I pushed him onto his back, facing me. The room was dimly lit, so I couldn't see him clearly, but it didn't matter. That night was enough.

I didn't waste time. I climbed over him, needing to taste the huge length pointing up at me. Patiently, I licked him from top to bottom, making him release a loud moan that only turned me on more.

I let go of him before he came in my mouth, then went back to kissing him hard. I took his hand and brought two of his fingers to my mouth, sucking them to make it easier for him to enter me.

He watched everything with glazed eyes. We kissed again, and I guided him into preparing me slowly until I was ready to take him.

"I'm... ready..."

I managed to say it. He turned me under him and started fucking me little by little. I groaned in pain, and soon it turned into pleasure.

My hands dug harder into his back. I needed him deeper inside me.

"Faster," I begged, full of desire.

He moaned while kissing me, and I wasn't any different.

We came together, but he didn't move away. He was sweaty and breathing hard. Within minutes, we were hard again. He fucked me on all fours at the edge of the bed, his large hands striking my ass as he held my waist hard. I knew I'd wake up covered in marks, but I didn't care. It had been months since I'd been fucked like that, and this guy was incredibly hot.

Chapter 02

Sergeant Eduardo Santos. Thirty-two years old. Six foot one.

I commanded a police team that fought the trafficking of stolen goods.

Knock. Knock.

The world was spinning, and the sound of someone knocking at the door seemed to be coming from inside my skull. Little by little, I woke with difficulty and managed to open my eyes. The bitter taste in my mouth told me I had drunk far more than I should have.

"Fuck! Fuck! What did I do?"

Panic hit me when a distant memory of what had happened surfaced in my mind.

I jumped out of bed completely naked. In that moment, I could see this was not my room, and it wasn't any of the rooms where I was used to sleeping either.

Thoughts crashed through my head.

"Where am I? What am I doing here?"

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The knocking came again, insistent. I found the sheet thrown on the floor, wrapped it around my waist, and walked to the door. I needed to know who was knocking on that damned door.

"Good afternoon, sir."

A young man in full uniform stood right outside.

"Who are you?"

I asked because I needed to figure out where I was.

"I'm the housekeeper for this hotel. I came to let you know your time is up, and we need to clean the room," the young man answered seriously, looking at me.

I glanced from one side to the other without any idea where I could possibly be.

"What time is it?" I asked him.

He looked at the watch on his wrist before answering.

"Sir, it's already six in the evening. Your room was paid for until this hour."

"Someone paid for the room?"

"Yes. A man left the room paid for," he answered as naturally as anything.

I thought I must not have heard him right. He had really said a man had paid for the room.

"Okay. I'm almost leaving."

I practically shut the door in the guy's face, I was so embarrassed.

My God, what had I done? How had I ended up in this room? And with a man?

I looked back at the room. It was completely destroyed. I walked through the mess, searching for my clothes, then hurried into the small bathroom. I needed to see the state I was in. The image reflected in the mirror wasn't good at all. My body was covered in marks and scratches all over my chest. I really must have been drugged. How could I have reached that point? I didn't remember anything. I ran a hand over my ass, and it didn't hurt, so I hadn't been the passive one that night.

I threw myself under the shower. I needed to clean my body and the smell of sex from my skin, along with the memories of the night before.

As the water poured down my body, the memory came like a video: a guy approaching me at the bar. I remembered a dark-skinned man with black eyes and a closed-off expression.

Then I remembered what had made me end up alone at a bar, drinking myself stupid.

Hours Earlier

"I'd like to know how long we're going to keep dragging out this engagement, Eduardo."

Once again, I was arguing with my fiancee, Lisa. We had been engaged for more than two years. I knew her family, and she knew mine. We worked in bed and out of it. But I had never stopped to think about marriage or having children the way she wanted.

That had been the reason behind our constant fights over the past few months. Lisa was twenty-eight. She wanted to get married and have children. I wanted the opposite.

I ran from both things like the devil ran from the cross. I saw some soldiers with wives and children, and I knew how painful it was for them when they left for work. I had grown up watching my father live that routine. Every time he left for any police job, my mother cried around the house. That wasn't what I wanted for my wife.

"We've already talked about this, Lisa," I reminded her.

The conversation was annoying, but it needed to be said.

Lisa was holding a suitcase. She didn't live here, but she already had several pieces of clothing and personal things scattered around my house.

"I think we should take some time, Eduardo."

Her voice was very serious.

"Time? You're asking me for time, Lisa?"

I thought I had heard her wrong, so I asked her to repeat it.

"Yes. I don't want to grow old dating. All my friends are already married or engaged, and they already have children."

"Baby, but... we're good like this."

I tried to hug her, but she pulled away from me.

"I'm going on a trip with some friends, and I hope you think hard about what really matters in your life."

She grabbed her bag and left, slamming the door. She didn't look back, and I didn't go after her the way I did every time we fought. If she wanted time, then I would give her time.

But today was not my day. Earlier, I had been informed that I would have to work with an army sergeant. According to the information, he was an excellent soldier, but also a ticking time bomb. I knew he had taken part in several missions both inside and outside the country, and his record was enviable.

There was no photograph of Sergeant Benjamin Santiago. But it didn't matter. When he showed up to introduce himself, we would meet face-to-face. What I needed was a cold beer to cool my head. After all that, I needed to be alone.

I changed quickly and put on a cap to disguise my long hair and unshaved beard.

I chose a little bar away from the condominium where I lived. The place was busy. Whenever I was alone, women started circling me. I was calm about it. I didn't cheat on Lisa. That night, all I really wanted was to relax.

Almost an hour later, a beautiful woman appeared with a drink in her hand. She came in all seductive, trying to start a conversation, but I wasn't in the mood to talk that night. To get rid of her, I took a sip of the drink she offered me. She stayed there beside me for a few minutes more and then walked away. Within minutes, my head began to spin, my body grew heavy, and drowsiness started taking over.

I don't know where he came from, but a guy appeared beside me with a rough voice and started talking to me. I remember saying I wasn't gay, and him confirming that he wasn't either.

Everything blurred. In flashes, I remembered leaving the bar while he pulled me along.

It all happened fast. In minutes, we were in the room, and I was shoving him against the door hard, taking control of the situation. I shook my head several times, wanting to get the images of that night out of it. Everything had been madness. I had completely lost control of my body and let myself be carried away by the emotions of the moment.

Reality

I began dressing in a rush, hoping I would never cross paths with that guy again in my life. I kept repeating it in my mind.

"I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay."

It had all been the drink's fault. I wanted to believe that so badly, but it wouldn't have happened otherwise.

I found my clothes scattered around the room and got dressed. I left suspiciously, pulling the cap down over my head to cover my face. I passed reception without even looking that way. I just wanted to get out of that hotel as fast as possible.

I was lucky there was a free taxi driver in front of the hotel. Now all I wanted was to get home, take a serious shower, and sleep.

Chapter 03

Narrator

Sergeant Benjamin Santiago

Benjamin found a comfortable apartment where he could stay until the job was over. He chose a place that was already furnished. He didn't need much. He only carried a large backpack on his shoulders and a small suitcase where he kept the clothes he used for specific situations.

He chose to rent a motorcycle. He liked the adrenaline, the wind hitting his face.

His phone began to ring. When he picked it up, he saw it was Alice, a soldier who worked with him and his only friend.

Alice Sampaio. Thirty years old. Five foot seven.

Benjamin's friend.

"Hey, gorgeous," Benjamin said.

"Would it kill you to tell your friend you're going off on another mission?" she said, upset.

"Calm down, girl. I'm fine."

"So? How was the reception in the big city?"

"Normal," Benjamin answered coldly.

"Normal? Normal how? Nothing with you is normal." The woman knew the sergeant very well.

"Do you really need to know me that well, Ms. Alice? Man, it was normal. I went out last night, and that's it."

He laughed as he said it.

"If you're saying it's normal, I'll believe you. But please don't take any risks in bars where you don't know anyone," his friend asked.

"Relax, girl. I won't do that. You're not here to get me out of jail."

He joked because she was always the one who pulled him out of trouble.

"Stop clowning around. You have to move on with your life. Forget him. He isn't coming back."

"I know, Alice, but it's so hard to forget someone who..."

"He didn't love you. Forget him. He's dead, and you're alive. You need to move on."

"They killed him, Alice," the sergeant reminded her sadly.

"Unfortunately, he paid a high price for being too reckless. He went into that mission alone because he wanted to show off," Alice reminded him.

The whole team had been on a mission, but Pedro received information and didn't pass it on to the others. He followed the lead by himself, walked into an ambush, and died.

Alice wasn't afraid to tell her friend the truth to his face. She had never liked the deceased man. She didn't understand why the soldier had been ashamed to acknowledge Benjamin. Benjamin was an honorable, handsome man, respected by everyone regardless of his sexuality.

"Okay. I'm not going to argue with you, young lady."

Santiago always let the conversation die there, because getting into a fight with his friend was a waste of time. She had her own opinion, and he couldn't do anything about it.

"I know this new job is a fresh start, so I want you to take advantage of it and control your impulses. Who knows? Maybe you'll find real love," said the person who knew the sergeant's temper better than anyone.

"God forbid. Who said I want a new love?" he grumbled.

"Please. A gorgeous, rich, intelligent man like you will soon find someone on your level. Maybe another beautiful, unattached soldier who actually wants to claim something with you."

Alice knew how to lift her friend's spirits.

"Now I have to work, miss. We'll talk later."

"Okay. I'll be waiting for good news," she said before hanging up.

Benjamin ended the call and dropped onto the sofa in front of the TV. He couldn't tell his friend what had happened the night before. She would get her hopes up, and that wasn't good. The only certainty he had was that he would never see that man again.