Im annie, the quite girl but inside of me im full of happiness, sadness and excitement and then i suddenly feel inlove with my bff crush

One day i was studying in our rooms and jane was running fast towards me she said she had a new crush but i spoke she already have a boyfriend last week they were so lovey dovey and now they suddenly broke up

out of nowhere her crush walk into our classroom with our teacher and jane is staring at him like a lost puppy to be honest

his handsome and cute not like other guy jane dated but that is life, you dated him and now...They broke up

The other girls is drolling over him it was yuck! i want to get out of this room but the teachers said i was his tour guide and the girls are whispering that i was lucky to be his tour guide but inside of me i was disgusted

This afternoon i was, i mean we are walking around because he dont know where is the restroom or even the gate of the school i wanted to punch him and then all the girl from other rooms is madly inlove with him and they were asking for his autograph like he some kind of celebrity and he enjoy but i ignore his big smilling face

we continued walking, a while later my stomach suddenly sounds hungry like asking me to eat up and then he started laughing at me and we went to the cafeteria and buy some food but everyone is staring at us like a weirdo come in

my eye locked at jane for a while and next i snap back to reality then i stand up and

running toward jane but it was late, i tried to explained, i was speaking korean or something else, that i was so scared i fainted infront of everyone

when i wake up i see jane and leo in my side

i explain to jane but she knew that i was tour guide leo

Tomorrow we have no school cause It's Saturday,, and we planned sleep over and even going to beach, tonight we prepared all we need to the beach food, sunscreen, clothes and everything

We are all exited to the beach, and we drove 3 hours,, so we decided to play some games and it's truth or dare Jane is asking Leo the game and meanwhile Jane and Leo are so lovey-dovey, when I see the two of them are happy I felt the sharp pain in my heart and it's been a while that I felt this kind of pain

I never expected this to happen I want Jane to be happy and I want myself to have a peachfull lIfe but Its kinda weird how i felt to leo wait am i jealous

i sat quietly and they are so happy and i envy them for their life or love life

We are now in the beach, but I slap my self cause to forget that jealousy

We laugh, we swim, and we played together it's so good to be a real person and I remember that I'm getting my jealous again!

I said to Jane that I will go swimming, and she slightly nods when she holds his hand, and put her head in his shoulder

I was jealous now I ran to the ocean and cool off a bit

When I'm done cooling off I went to find them and they were holding hand each other but it's so tight that Leo's knuckle turned white

I was so furious that I left the beach without telling them anything about my crush

The next day I was In my locker Then I receive a letter I open It and he/she said lets be friend in online and there is a username in it

When I got home, I openly my computer as I thought she was a girl

i added her, and when i say hi she started yapping all of a sudden i was shock that she is a yapper and talkative person

For the past weeks we started to get along very well and talking about our life, emotion and our crush

I thought we are the best partner as a friend, but somehow I like her as a crush I'm just a shy and enjoyable girl that's all

Honestly I was less jealous now, when I go to school and see them together laughing and studying I felt the pain of loneliness and I started to like it

When Jane noticed it, I ignore her question and even Leo, I don't care anymore they hurt my feeling

And I tell my anonymous friend that all happen today and yesterday, a little while I started crying even my mom asked why I'm crying in the middle of the night

I answer I was watching a k drama, I know I was lying right now it's hurts to tell mom because I know what she's going to say

And I'm writing my diary for 3 years now it's all filled with sad, joy, angry, jealousy, and excitement, everyone has a diary, but some people have don't one, or they don't like it

Tomorrow I will confess my love feelings to Leo I don't care what others said except for my dear best friend Jane

Tomorrow begins, I confess my love to Leo and I don't know that Jane is watching me confess my feeling

And what I said there's a rumor's that I betrayed my best friend, and that not true at all

It was so embarrassing in front of everyone that i want to die right now, today like no tomorrow huhuhu😭

Its just my luck today, i will never ever do that again i promise to myself

I apologize to Jane and Jane is laughing at right now, then she said its wasn't him his crushing too

And i said, why you didnt tell me and there is a rumor's that i betrayed you😭😭😭😭