Anonymous Confession

You can call me dyne 16 years old male

I have been in love with my male cousin ever since I was a kid because he was handsome, tall, kind, and kinda dark. I loved those things about him, especially since he was super sporty.

One time, my brother, another cousin, and I went to their house for Christmas vacation. My other cousins and I were playing, and our uncles were singing.

Then, my auntie told me to go upstairs to call Jay, my cousin. As I went upstairs and was going to knock, I heard something. I got a feeling to go to the terrace because there is a small ventilation window. When I looked through there, I caught my cousin doing something: he was masturbating. He was naked and laying on his bed while watching porn.

I was caught off guard by what he was doing.

Then he saw me looking because there is a mirror in front of him; the mirror faced toward the ventilator. He put a towel around himself, quickly got out of his room, grabbed my arm, and dragged me into his room. He said to me:

"Please don't tell anyone."

Then he suddenly kissed me. I was shocked out of my wits. Then he started undressing me, and I saw it—I saw the thing that I was never meant to see.

I cannot lie, it was huge and super hard. Then he told me to suck it. I didn't know what came over me; I started sucking it. But why do I have this feeling? I felt it was wrong—it was really wrong.

After that day, he started noticing me, and we did that sometimes.

Then, after one month, he introduced a pretty girl, and he told his parents that she was his girlfriend. I was there when he introduced her to his parents, and I was heartbroken.

So I started avoiding him for five months now. Then I heard that they broke up, and now he is starting to ask to do what we used to do.

Please suggest the right thing that I should do; I don't want to make the same mistake again.