I cut myself again ... I just hate my life and have thought of commiting suicide because of all my problems.

Sometimes I think of this and just cry until I fall asleep , I would like to say... I am planning my death and ... And will not stop trying .

This is the trigger I have been waiting all this time. My parents fight and get me in it and I love them all but.. I feel that no one can understand my pain and only think about themselves .

Maybe I don't know if someone from my family also has depression,

my parents don't believe that depression is  real and  think that it is fake . And well I know this is my first time taking about anything in this case my problems but I think this will help me get over the pain I'm living and... Well at least ... Try to stat again.

And I hope in any other case I will a least try to survive to get to my dreams or close to them .

I will tell you more about things that happen to me during my life.

I love only a few things in this life that i love and one of them is my Dog named Choco she has always been there for me since I was  eight and has never left my side.

I love her with all my heart and will never let anyone do anything harmful to her .Choco is a French poodle mini toy and she is a carameld color , she was once bit by three full grown  Pit bulls and was almost killed but I found her in time and took her to the vet ,

since that day I have never let someone or something get close to her.

This is all that I have to tell you today and I hope you will stay with me and will never give up on me just like how other people have without showing any mercy. My whole PAIN is put in this and it feels great to get it out of my chest because it feels like a big backpack has been taking off my shoulders and put down.