Locked in silence

I feel like the words could never be enough to explain the depth of feeling that sprouts up anytime that you are near, have always being a private person, a calm that could never rattle, but your presence caused a chain of reaction I couldn't begin to phantom, in my silence you felt as though I didn' t care, not know that what lay beneath the stillness I portrayed was a burning inferno, a never ending passion that lit my heart afire, that I found meaning in your presence and feel bereft when you are far, and yet I hide so much beyond the stony countenance its a hardship to discern the direction of my colorful thoughts, so you wouldn't know that the silence was because words would have never felt enough, have being hurt so many times I decided to lock up, hoping no one would be able to access the part of me that cares but always acts like it doesn't, I know what it feels like to be turned away, so I hid it all the fiery, burning part of my self that could be ignited by a moments kindness, it takes some kind of courage to love, have your whole life be about something and someone become the light of your world, someone who lits your world like a million stars, I wanna be that kind of person for you, but fear won't let me, it feels like I can't come to a decision because I feel like I'll end up getting the other end of the straw yet, I keep waiting and coming around, that the desire and passion would find an outlet that could always me express myself in ways that there would be no contrast between how you began and I ended, I could be the answers to your prayers if you would ignore that I could never find the words to say, that the silence were the words that I couldn't say, some wounds bleed in a way you could see but what do we do about the heart that hurts so much it freezes, so many times have being cold frigid but I think its a warped thing to say because what I feel for you burns like a hot lava. Am a coward because even if the world was about to end I wouldnt be able to say the words that will make you stay, that when I envision my world, I see you at its center, that I wanna share everything with you down to my last day, when I can barely lift my hands to say hello, so its necessary that I'll make sacrifices for you, because you are just like the air I breathe, I dream also in beautiful coulours of living together sharing smiles, a beautiful meal and enjoying breeze late at night while holding hands, I dream of going on vacations to places I have always read about, so that you will know that I choose you above all else

Beauty isn't everything, but yours leave me i n daze it feels like light from above shines on you, so I admire and adore all that you are, and i want you to know I would be everything you dream of and more. That I'll be the shield for you against the world and the thought of yours that might do harm. So I want you to live knowing that my words are my silenceLocked in silence

I feel like the words could never be enough to explain the depth of feeling that sprouts up anytime that you are near, have always being a private person, a calm that could never rattle, but your presence caused a chain of reaction I couldn't begin to phantom, in my silence you felt as though I didn' t care, not know that what lay beneath the stillness I portrayed was a burning inferno, a never ending passion that lit my heart afire, that I found meaning in your presence and feel bereft when you are far, and yet I hide so much beyond the stony countenance its a hardship to discern the direction of my colorful thoughts, so you wouldn't know that the silence was because words would have never felt enough, have being hurt so many times I decided to lock up, hoping no one would be able to access the part of me that cares but always acts like it doesn't, I know what it feels like to be turned away, so I hid it all the fiery, burning part of my self that could be ignited by a moments kindness, it takes some kind of courage to love, have your whole life be about something and someone become the light of your world, someone who lits your world like a million stars, I wanna be that kind of person for you, but fear won't let me, it feels like I can't come to a decision because I feel like I'll end up getting the other end of the straw yet, I keep waiting and coming around, that the desire and passion would find an outlet that could always me express myself in ways that there would be no contrast between how you began and I ended, I could be the answers to your prayers if you would ignore that I could never find the words to say, that the silence were the words that I couldn't say, some wounds bleed in a way you could see but what do we do about the heart that hurts so much it freezes, so many times have being cold frigid but I think its a warped thing to say because what I feel for you burns like a hot lava. Am a coward because even if the world was about to end I wouldnt be able to say the words that will make you stay, that when I envision my world, I see you at its center, that I wanna share everything with you down to my last day, when I can barely lift my hands to say hello, so its necessary that I'll make sacrifices for you, because you are just like the air I breathe, I dream also in beautiful coulours of living together sharing smiles, a beautiful meal and enjoying breeze late at night while holding hands, I dream of going on vacations to places I have always read about, so that you will know that I choose you above all else

Beauty isn't everything, but yours leave me i n daze it feels like light from above shines on you, so I admire and adore all that you are, and i want you to know I would be everything you dream of and more. That I'll be the shield for you against the world and the thought of yours that might do harm. So I want you to live knowing that my words are my silence

CONFESSION,

Words are the language, I worship, the terrain I follow, whether rough or smooth, come rain or shine

I kept asking myself what if I said yes

But really the answer lies not with me but with you,

I had said my Yes from the first moment you made me smile

My head and heart keep warring, but alas a concession was made through truce

And even though when the head says he's a stranger, the. Heart says his soul speak to us

And when the head says to let go, the heart says to let you see beneath the darkest recess of my core

And yet I want to hold on to the vestige of sanity

So you don't leave with the broken pieces and leave me all empty

My heart says to trust you with the most vulnerable part of me because you could keep it safe

I hope its enough to let you know that I do want you, that I do trust you,

I know the worst kind of pain is the one caused by those you explained your fears to so I promised no hurt

I hope you know my word is my bond

And I'll choose you a thousand times in a thousand way and a million life time

So this is for you what if I said yes

Do you still think we couldn't be TOGETHER

Do you still think we have no chance...

And if it is so I'll take whatever you give and hope its enough

To let you know I chose You.........

Redemption

Here I am before you, ***** in heart mind and soul, hoping you see the cracks in the mighty wall I present, that I am vulnerable only for you, I came to present my self in a new light, that I could be better for you, I could give you all you never think you deserved and more, that you could be at your best with me, that your voice will never go unheard, I'll never bring you down,

I was a boy, but now am a man, willing and hoping to have the love of a woman such as you, that your light may illuminate my world, that you will always wonder where I had being all your life, because you couldn't envision a world without me, that me redeeming myself in your presence is making you a promise that will last forever, I promise to always be there, and no matter what you don't have to look back because i am watching your back and I got you scars and all it don't matter. I accept all that you are and look forward to all that you will be, I hope I become the definition of peace you've longed and waited for all your life, and going together in this journey you never look back only forward, cheers to forever and more hand in hand.

Life offered so many limes

Put so many enemies disguised as friends

Gave hope and took it all way

Make it look like it gave favors

Made me feel indebted I could barely breathe

Spat in the face of my sacrifice

Gave me chances until I knew it was a trap

I keep dreaming

Plotting and planning my revenge

Revenge consumed me

It was the only thing I could see

But then you came

Innocent as a babe, you who wouldn't hurt a fly

A heart so pure and serene

The recipient of my long accumulated anger

And yet you never gave up

You Gave me all you were and more

The care, the love,

Like I was a gift on its own

Made me feel like I was more than enough

Like you could see beneath the well designed facade

To know it was all a charade

So I had to let go of the past

Because being with you was all and everything

Worth any sacrifice I could ever make

Now I know

What it feels like to be in his arms

To have his arms clasp around tightly as if worried I might disappear

Now I feel the warmth, that slowly erodes the cold

The scent that seems to permeate him,

The scent of home and safety

And yet am scared, that I am a replacement to the woman he could never forget

He asks me is this what you want,

What if i said yes

But what about what he wants

Am I what he wants...

Could he let her memories go

The memories he clings too so hard

Feels like a heavy load to me,

Who makes bad decision

Yet the heart wants what it wants to be near and close

As two hearts that beat as one

The questions keep swirling in my head, is this real

Or am just a rebound

Reawakening

Feels like have being in a limbo, slumbering trying to while away the time,

It was getting so monotonous nothing new, just a bunch of repeat

Then came a spark that aroused all that I was, reawakening all that was dying

Reforming and becoming new, shedding the woes of the past, hurts, betrayal and let downs

Letting my inner diva out, the most determined i could be, letting the shroud fall apart

What's being encasing me all this time, feels like have being dying slowly while alive

The embers of light slowly ebbing away, until all that was left was but a kindle

It didn't take much to reignite, didn't want my life to be in disarray, the sense of who I was slowly passing through my hands, I summoned the desire to be more, leaving cells of souls to rejuvenate

The torn parts of me could only repair and reform and soon I was restored to the best I could be

It took a while to go through the cycle of reawakening putting all that I was on a journey...