"I hate you" I shouted as I started to walk away, tears rolling down my cheeks. I hated it when I cried, it showed my weakness but this time it was different, my tears were proof of how much his actions and words had hurt me. He just stood there while I kept walking away, from him and his life, and maybe it was the last time he was seeing me. I know he wanted to stop me but didn't and I wanted to stay but couldn't and in that brief moment, I loved him more than anything and anyone in my entire life.

I just continued to walk ignoring the people on the street who have started to look at me with concerned eyes. At a moment I was nearly running, wanting to get away from him as fast as possible. As I reached the man street I stretched my hand out for a taxi and opened the back door just standing in front of it for a moment thinking of turning around but didn't and took the seat after telling him my hotel name. For a minute he looked at me wanting to know if I was okay but just nodded and started the car. As the car was going ahead I knew I was going away from him forever.

...----------------...

Chapter 1: A dream like no other

I feel hot like something is burning inside me slowly affecting my whole body. The backside of my body feels somewhat cold and wet making my body a combination of hot and cold at the same time. I open my eyes but nothing can be seen properly everything is blurred just like the filter in a phone, my body is too weak to move and the light hanging on top of my head makes it more difficult to make out the surrounding, maybe it is my curiosity that gave my body a little strength to explore the room. The room is colored with blue just like my eyes making me a part of it. The bed on which I am lying is drained with water just like my body. Across the room lies a table piled up with books, on the left is a wardrobe open just enough to see the things inside, the whole room is scattered with cloths making a pattern on the floor. I have never been in this room before but it still gives me a vibe that I have been here thousands of times. Suddenly something or someone touches my feet drawing all my attention towards itself. Its a boy, the face is unclear making it difficult to recognize, but as his hand starts moving up discovering every inch of my leg, a sudden chill drives my whole body shaking. As he gets closer and closer his face becomes more visible but I can only see his lips as the light is still very bright or I am too weak to open my eyes fully, but just by looking at his lips l can identify the person because these are the lips that I always wanted to touch, wanted to feel, the lips I longed for, these are the lips of Noah Philip. As he gets closer and closer I can feel his breath mixing with mine making us inseparable. I closed my eyes so that I could experience my first kiss. After waiting for almost one minute a sudden sound hits my ear, a familiar sound the sound of my alarm clock and it becomes clear that it was all a dream, a dream like no other. Though it was not the first time I dreamed of Noah was the only dream that lifted my hopes because the previous dreams were nothing like this.

As I open my eyes I am back in my room, a front wall covered with the pictures of Noah, making my heart race. The whole room is filled by the morning light coming from the glass window covering the entire sidewall making everything shine, increasing the beauty of all the lifeless things, and lastly increasing my beauty. Looking at Noah, even just his pictures always fill me with a strange feeling, something that I have only read in novels or seen on television, a feeling that I have never felt for someone or maybe I will never feel for someone. This front wall is very special for me not only because of its pictures but also because of the memories I share with my best friend Kate. She moved to Boston from Portland when she was in second grade, before her I can't even think one name I call a friend. From the very beginning, I was a little different from other children, always reading a book, maybe I have my mom to blame for that as she always used to read books when she was carrying me inside of her. Kate and I are polar opposites, she doesn't like to read and she is damn lazy, she's so lazy that her parents have to buy her a car because she felt tired to ride a bike to school and I being a badminton player am not that lazy.

I just started playing to reduce my weight not that I was extremely fat, but as I didn't have many friends in the past my dad used to find me laying and reading all the time, these books became my best friend showing me the world, making me experience things just by reading those words and soon badminton became an important part in my life. My dad made me join badminton as he thought that it would help to make friends and also because he's a great fan of Lee Chong Wei. Kate entered my life in second grade and from then we had been best of friends. She was the only person that understood me and accepted me just the way I was, she showed me what it was to have a friend and made me do all the crazy things that I never imagined I would, it was her who decorated my front wall and made me drink vodka though I passed out after having one shot ( and my father still doesn't know and I think it's for the best ).

Kate took the place of my mom whom I actually never knew except in my dad's stories. She died when I was one year old from then it's me, dad, and mochi my dog. When she died I was small so it didn't hit me as it did to my dad, my dad or Mr. Harper Anderson as other people know him fell in love with my mom Mrs. Elle cooper in high school and got married after finishing their college, my mother gave birth to me after two years, it has been 16 years since she left us but my dad never even for once thought about remarrying. I don't really think about my mom very often but there are times when I miss her it's just that the missing time is reduced by Kate's entry.

As I was flooded in our memories I heard my dad calling "Love breakfast is ready", I turned to look at the clock its hand was striking seven forty-five, it's been half an hour since I have woken up and now I am going to be late for school. I jumped out of my bed rushing towards the bathroom, normally I take a long bath soaking myself completely in the bathtub but today I could only use the shower and while brushing my teeth I could hear my dad calling me and finally Kate's car horn. I took a cold bath for about thirty seconds to drive away all my thoughts, wrapped myself a towe, and led my way towards the wardrobe placed on the other side of the bed and it's a complete mess with all the clothes scattered like no one has organised it in years and started searching for something to wear, finally, I found a black t-shirt with 'l love NY' engraved and my light blue jeans. Putting them on and tying my hair in a pony, I grabbed my Yonex t-shirt and shorts which Kate had given me on my last birthday and placed them inside my bag and raced towards the table to grab my books, during this whole process I could continuously hear Kate's horn beeping in the tune of some song, I swear she can be so irritating sometimes. As I put on my watch I am pretty sure I am going to be late, it takes fifteen minutes to reach school but to my shock, it's only been five minutes I got ready in five minutes! ( a lifetime achievement ), after applying a touch of makeup I plucked out my phone from the charger and dashed out of my room towards the kitchen skipping two stairs at a time.

Dad was waiting at the table as normal reading his newspaper and eating breakfast and mochi was sitting next to him while searching for the last piece of his breakfast from his bowl. During all these years my dad had learned to prepare all kinds of meals and he can become a head chef of a restaurant if he wants, by the way, he owns a publishing house, and all this just to make sure that I don't feel sad about not having a mom. Sometimes I wonder what our lives would have been if mom just stayed with us, would me and dad have been the same? would it be the same relationship? or everything would have been different. Looking at my dad I can tell he still misses her very much but is too afraid to show it because of me. As soon as he saw me he laid down his paper to look at me. We have a tradition that every morning I will spare five minutes to sit and talk to him, telling him about my previous day and having breakfast together, but today is not the day and he knows it.

I quickly grabbed a french toast from my plate while patting mochi with another when he started to take a round of my legs passing through them fully prepared to play and headed towards the door stopping on a red light, in front of my dad to give me a kiss. While he kisses me I heard a long and loud horn and I know she's getting serious I fixed the toast in my mouth, lifting my shoes in my hand, and running towards her car with mochi following me. Kate was sitting in her convertible vintage opened from the top which her parents had bought her on last birthday,

"Hi Kate" I shouted

She turned to look at me and instantly by looking at her face I could tell what she is thinking, this expression of hers is the silence before the earthquake if I had been just a second later I would have witnessed the disaster in front of my eyes, anyhow I still have to deal with it during our drive but I know how to calm her down.

Kate loves chocolates and that is her biggest weakness like mine is books. I always keep some in my bag for emergency situations. I know it's not decent to bribe your best friend but sometimes it's necessary. Kate is nothing like me, she's cute enough to make every boy flatter with his light brown eyes, perfect body figure, and blond smooth hair, she is a cheerleader, always dancing and making me laugh and along with that she's a protective friend and if you're curious we became friends this way. We were in second grade and some children were teasing me and she was new in school and didn't have many friends. She broke every single bone of the children teasing me just to find a reason to talk to me, the school has to call the parents of those kids to take them home. Though she faced detention we became friends. Truth to be told, she will even kick the *** out of her boyfriend if he made fun of me, not exaggerating she actually did it one time.

Putting my feet inside the shoes just enough to allow me to run without getting them on the ground l ran towards her car jumping from above the car door and landed into the front seat and started to fix shoes. She turned to face me and I exactly know why, without saying a word I pulled out a Twix bar from my backpack and smoothly placed into hers. Finally, she turned towards the steering and started the car after waving at mochi, first driving slowly and gradually increasing the speed to 80 km/h. Normally I shout at her for increasing the speed but today's mistake was mine and I'll better be quite.

"I had a dream about Noah," I said

"Again," she said and I nodded

"It's not like I always have a dream in which Noah appears" I replied

"But most probably you do"

"But this was not the kind of dream that I usually have"

"When was the last time you dreamed of me huh ?" and now she has asked something that's a little harder to answer. It was actually only one time when she appeared in my dream and that too just to drop me home. It's not like I usually dream of Noah, it would have been only four-five times when he showed up.

"Well don't you wanna know about the dream" I changed the subject and she noticed it.

"Yeah well go on" she answered while turning the car towards the left and then I realized how beautiful she really is. Kate is a girl most of the guy's dream of, she has the best dressing sense among all the people I know, though there are not many. Today too she's wearing a white v neck blouse and denim skirt reaching mid-waist and ripped from the sides. She threw her hair open which is floating along the air making her look like a perfect model for Canvas, to match her look she's wearing white sneakers.

As I tell her about my dream, she only nods and gives me different types of expressions.

"I can't believe you had such a dream" she finally said and I nod with a huge smile on my face.

"Maybe you'll proceed even ahead next time"

"Yup maybe"

"By the way was he wearing clothes?" She asks to tease me and I know by this where she's going.

"Kate!!!" I shouted to let her know that she has succeeded.

"Now hang on I am going to increase the speed or we'll be late"

I placed my backpack on the back seat wondering how much faster can this car get and after one moment I know.

Kate parked the car just three minutes before the school starts and without glancing at each other we rushed inside the school. As we walk through the hallway making our way to our lockers I see Henry approaching us in his white jacket with black sleeves and blue jeans. Mine and Kate's locker stand next to each other, mine is filled with books and photos and hers is loaded with cheerleading stuff. Henry is our most reliable friend or mainly like my brother. We met when he joined the badminton team for a while but soon discovered that it was not his kind of stuff so he is now a member of the football team and one of the most handsome guys in school.

While I am busy talking to Kate about the tournament and taking out my books from the locker I feel a huge and heavy hand on my shoulder crushing me and by the look on Kate's face, I can tell that it's Henry. I turned to look him in the eye warning him to drop his hand but he doesn't, he loves to tease me.

"Hello ladies," he said as he looks at me and Kate.

"Hi, Henry" I replied and Kate nodded.

"So concerned about your selection for the tournament? " he asked

"No, not really I am certain that this year I am coach's first preference" I said and it was not something to just say but it's the truth, last year Mei was the best of us all but this year the tables have turned. I worked my *** off to exceed her and finally, it has happened and also because she was busy with her boyfriend Jack. She is a Asian American girl. Her grandparents shifted here many decades ago. She has always been the best in our team but not anymore.

"Hmm" Henry mumbled as I was lost in my thoughts of surpassing Mei.

"But how do you know about the tournament," I asked as I never told him about it.

"Noah told me" he replied, curious to see my reaction. Well, how could I forget that when Noah first came to school Henry was in charge of showing him around and they have been friends since then.

"So he's taking it seriously? " I asked

"No, you know he never takes it seriously" he answered like I already knew it, and actually I did. Noah wants to become a neurosurgeon and playing badminton is just a hobby but he's so good at it that he can almost beat everyone in our team and this is the thing that pisses me off the most if you are not taking it seriously then you have no right to take away others chances. Badminton has never been a popular game in America mainly because of its lack of wins but I want to change it all my dream is to win an Olympic gold medal so that one day every child will desire to play it.

"Hi, Kate" Bao shouts from the back as he approaches us.

Bao is the most annoying person that ever existed. He has a crush on Kate from the sixth standard and proposed her three times and rejected continuously and most foremost he is Mei's brother.

"Hi, Bao" Kate says as he stands by her side giving a creepy look to Henry like asking him to get lost. Henry and Kate dated for two months in the ninth standard but it didn't work out so they resolved on remaining friends. Bao is a person most girls would prefer to stay away, he's shy and gives a creepy feeling but Kate has always been so kind and gentle that she even thinks of Bao as a friend. Almost all the people who passed by said hello to us all accept Bao, girls in a sing-song manner when they saw Henry.

"Let's go to the class " Henry said as we have our first lesson together. This is the only class that I don't have with Kate, she has trigonometry and I have algebra.

"See you soon" Kate said as she made her way in the opposite direction with Bao.

"We should get going too" Henry said as I grab my book.

Just as I turned after closing my locker and started walking observing Henry flirt with almost every girl in the hallway, Noah passed by seeking the attention of all girls which Henry had at a time making my whole body shake a little as a sudden cold breeze has just passed. This is the effect Noah has on me, just by looking at his perfect face fills me with an entirely different feeling, a feeling never experienced before, a feeling I want to experience again and again and with the same person. I still remember when I first met him, he was standing in the hallway talking to Henry when I and Kate ran into him. I was walking backward talking to Kate, not aware of his presence and as he was new I didn't even know him but just heard some hot guy has appeared in school, when accidentally I tripped off and landed on the floor and started laughing seeking all the attention towards myself that's when I saw Noah for the first time. He was staring at me with his green eyes as I started back, for the first time looking in someone's eyes made me feel lost, his eyes were as green as a whole forest was residing in it and I was wandering in it with no clue how to get out. His light brown hair complimented his eyes and milk-like skin shined due to the sunlight falling on his face. For some time he kept staring at me perhaps wondering what to do whether to laugh at me like others or offer me a hand. Finally, our eye connection broke when Henry helped me up and introduced us to Noah Phillips.

Henry and I always sit next to each other in the last row of the class as we don't like maths that much and it gives us the advantage to sleep. Our maths teacher is Mr. Jacob Mathew one of the best teachers in the world because he does not care the slightest who sleeps in his class. When we enter the class all seats almost full except ours. As we make our way to the seat many girls wave at Henry telling him that they are interested and he most probably already has there numbers. While I went straight ahead to my seat he stopped to talk with some boys. I still don't understand how I became friends with the most popular people in our school.

Whit the second bell Mr. Jacob entered the class and Henry rushed to his seat beside me. I went to sleep as he started his boring lecture and Henry started his act of studying. It had only been ten minutes since the class started when suddenly the school speaker busted in my coach's scary voice, sometimes I think that he would have been more successful if he did something with his voice, he could have been a storyteller or something. Having an announcement in the middle of the class is not at all normal and it has to be something very important and sleeping is no longer possible.

"All the players of the badminton team are required to assemble in the court within five minutes" he announced and it's finally time for the team announcement. Henry looked at me and I looked at him as we both smiled, he gave me two thumbs up mainly one from him and another from Kate.

"Rock it baby" Henry said as I closed my book.

"Of course but just don't forget to take my book with you if I didn't come back in time" I replied with excitement dripping all over my face.

"That goes without saying but just don't die of excitement on your way" Henry shouted as I made my way to the door. I turned around to give him a smile. Kate's class is on the way to the court and that's perfect because she would have killed me if I didn't visit her before going. There are almost twenty people who call themselves a part of the team but most of them are just there for passing their time only a few are there who can be called players and the selection is between them. As I walk in the hallway to reach Kate's classroom I see almost all the people who even for once have stepped into the court most of whom were there to bunk their classes.

"Jack, Jack!!" I shouted as I saw him walking in front of him. Jack is the best player in our team even better than Noah and I don't know how I would have survived in the team if he wouldn't have been there. When Noah first joined the team I was so concerned about how I looked while playing that I almost started to restrict myself of giving my fullest and started giving more importance to my looks. At that time my game took such a turn that I even started to lose to the people who have just begun to play but thanks to all the gods that Jack noticed it and made me understand that I play for myself and not to look good in someone's eyes and if someone thinks that I look ugly while playing then that person was never meant for me.

He turned around and smiles slowing down a little for me to catch up with him. He is the only person who will make it to the team without a question.

" Heading towards Kate's classroom " he said with full confidence making me wonder if I am that easy to understand.

"Heck yeah!! she'll kill me if I didn't " I answered with a smile. As we continue to walk further, the corridor was starting to fill with a great number of voices some praying while some shouting with confidence and these are the people who are themselves certain that they won't be going anywhere and this is the common scene every year. This competition is very important due to many of its benefits after all its the National Junior Badminton Tournament which is held every year by the government to extract out the players of the future. If you grab the first position in any of the categories you are sure to represent the nation in one championship or the other and the most beneficial aspect is the camp which is held for three months for the winners and also the prize money.

We reached Kate's classroom after a while and I started to peep inside from the back door as Jack leaned on the wall waiting for me. She was sitting in the first row fully drowning in the lecture. Sometimes I think that I and Kate became friends because she has no brain and I am filled with her share too. She knew that I would be coming before going for the announcement but still, she was sitting in the first row and now how the heck am I going to let her see me, I cannot shout or else her teacher would kill me, after all, she is not called fatso-demon like that and even if I try to pass on a message to her from the back no one would listen as not even one person has dared to look away when she's teaching but I gotta try something.

"Shh! Sh sh" I tried to call out the last person sitting in the class next to the door but he just ignored me like he never heard a sound and that's exactly what I was expecting. After being ignored I turned back to look at Jack and I saw Noah staring at me in confusion and I would have fallen on the ground due to shock if Jack hadn't caught me in time. While I was stabilizing my balance Noah had already turned around and started walking but I saw his lips crooked in a smile just as he left.

"Well, what was he staring at" I asked Jack as I had no idea what I have done to make Noah stare at me.

"Well you see your *** was in the wrong angle" he said and I could see that he got a little embarrassed as he said that.

"Noah was staring at my ***" I almost shouted with a little smile on my face and I know that it shouldn't be there but I can't help it.

"Not exactly he was looking at the strange things you were doing" he replied breaking all my hopes at once.

"He did smile though" I answered with pride as if I did something great.

"Well this is not the way Noah would take to reach the court so maybe you think that he's here to see me" I said cutting his words as he was about to speak something.

"Your imagination sure is high now finish this up real quick or we'll be late" he said which gave me a great idea.

"Just run as fast as possible when I am done talking" I said with him still looking a little confused as he was not able to understand what I am saying but never mind. I peeped inside the class one more time and then started shouting

"Kate I know you wanna wish me good luck and I already received it I will surely make it this time you too are studying hard keep going" as soon as I finished I started running without even looking at her reaction or of anyone else but I am sure they all were shocked and fatso would be burning in anger but I had no other option. I turned around to look at Jack and he was running at the same speed as I was and laughing loudly which made me laugh too. We both slowed down and finally headed towards the court.

When we reached almost everyone was already lined up and my couch was on the stage holding the mike checking it countless times. He was accompanied by the principle and a few other teachers. When we joined the line he handed the mike to the principle who started with his boring speech which I have heard a hundred times. While he was delivering his speech my eyes got fixed at Noah who was in the third line. Then finally the moment arrived when he opened the sheet in which all the names were written and started announcing. First, he announced the category of boys singles and doubles, and as assumed Jack was the first preference but something shocked me to my core the second name was not of Noah but it was Richard. At that moment I knew I should be happy for Jack but the only thing I felt was hurt, hurt that I won't be able to go on my last trip with him and I wouldn't see him in court playing when we practice. Soon he started to announce the girl's category first, he announced doubles and then came to the singles. My heart began to race but as he announced the names it soon began breaking apart the first preference was Mia and second, was Rachel. For a moment I felt like I was dead, the whole world started fading and the surrounding started to get blurry and Jack grabbed my hand pressing it tightly to make me feel comfortable and it was then that I realized that tears were flowing down my cheeks and I started to wipe it off roughly with frustration. Everything I and dad have planned for my future got crushed in front of me, my dreams and dad's hopes everything ended in front of me. Jack's handgrip didn't loosen a little bit as he continued to hold my hand. The principle then came to announce the name of the mix double pair and when he announced it I knew that this tournament was done for because the pair was me and Noah.