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How To Kiss The Precolonial Prince

Chapter 1

A random girl from 21st century who's fond of reading romance story and flirting tips, has travelled thousands of years to precolonial Philippines to pursue her last will.

There she met the man of beliefs in the place called City of Biringan, where the ancient people acquires extraordinary powers in a fantasy world that every body wants to go in.

It is said to be existing thousand years ago lurking somewhere in the archipelago appearing only every a decade. Due to an accident, this girl entered the portal of the lost city but traveled back to its history thousand years ago.

Being the most shameless, vicious and rough girl in her past life, how can she deal with the mighty cold blooded prince of Biringan?

Can she even touch this icy man's heart not to mention her main goal to colonize him with her methods from the modern age or will she die there and be buried with her lustful dream...

Their battle soon will begin.

*** The Slumber Surprise***

It is past twelve in the midnight.

All her friends and classmates are drunk. Most of them are girls and are already sleeping together on her living room after finishing remaining two cases of beer, and the others go outside to do what they planned to do with their hook ups.

But this shameless woman named Danica Szhiout, (pronounced as zhoot), the slumber party celebrant, an eighteen years old, half French, half fries--- I mean half Filipino, was still waiting for Carl's reply.

Full of hopes with her new target for her birthday's main course. She feels excited for another memorable experience.

For some vivid reason she just can't let her eyes off with the last word that she sent him, forcing her self not to laugh.

[I'm going upstairs honey, I'll wait there]-(encrypted message used Morse code)

Sure, she's now celebrating with her thoughts that this man will tell her friends that she forced him too much, or feeling excited that somehow she feels, there's a miracle that will happen.

But who knows, why she's still doing this, even if she already knew that this man thinks differently on what she really wanted to do with him.

She bid them goodbye, having rest as an escape reason, but some of them tease her and others are mockingly prayed for Carl's heath.

*Bzzzt* *Bzzzt*

Danica took her phone in her pajama pocket, and read the incoming message.

[Dan, actually I'm lost, I'm sorry. I just peed outside and I can't find my way back]- Carl replied to her.

Disgustingly, she rolled her eyes. The little math wizard has no sense of direction.

Although he's acting weird and little bit naive, for her, Carl is still a good catch and a nice flirt mate. He is actually a handsome guy (she never picked average though), smart, and most specially the thing that attracts her the most is his innocence. He must be v*rgin, she thought.

She must not lose this opportunity to negotiate with him. Not this time that those other girls she invited, attended her party just because of that man. Of course she knew them well.

So, heaving a deep sigh, she goes out of the inn and look for Carl in the nearby woods just to find her missing prey.

While searching Carl around, she saw Riza, one of her best friend puking grease. She can't help but just gave her an evil laugh.

"Bwahahahaha, have I warn you not to shake the brandy before gulping? grandma said to me, you can get... you know... well, I advice you to take pregnancy test later sis, but anyway, have you seen Carl?"- she asked.

"Bluuuuuh--- I shaw---Bluuuuuuuhhh--- shit!---there! Bluuuuhhh"- Riza replied uselessly while pointing at the darker part of the place with huge trees.

"Are you sure?"-she asked again for confirmation.

Riza Nod's and holds on her shoulder for support but suddenly she smells something not nice on her shirt.

Riza, might have lost her mind for drinking too much, so she needs to check her out of kindness, they're good friends after all, but to find where Carl has gone is the more important thing at the moment, she think.

"Sorry sis, I gotta go, Carl really needs me right now. bye bye!" she grab some of Riza's hair and use it to wipe the pukes she had put in her shirt.

"Sorry sis, see ya later" she waved her hand and run towards the direction where Riza just had saw Carl, but its too dark and she barely see nothing.

So she opened her phone flashlight, roam around... and to her surprise, she witness something she never expected to see with her innocent eyes. *sarcasm*

"Oh my goodness!!!" she exclaimed.

*dropping of the phone with flashlight from hand*

She's never like that but she just wanted to interrupt the two with disgust.

Carl is actually torridly kissing with Jerome, Riza's boy friend.

She's not actually against same s*x relationship but Carl is an exemption because, he's her big fish and worst, he's her bestfriend's long-term boyfriend that she despised the most.

"What the hell Carl! You are really lost huh? for goodness sake! but you never tell me that its your mind! You moron, have you really lost your mind? that's why you can't go back? don't you know that I planed this for month and you just---- hahaha I'm actually fooled, I can't believe it." - Danica do not easily get stressed but when it comes her boys, she never forgive everything that ruins her plan.

"Dan?! w-what are you doing here?" Carl asked by surprise and anxious for Danica's reckless personality. He know he, should never messed with the vicious woman, but he really like jerome that's why he risk everything.

"You have no right to asked you *sshole, and you d*ck head cheater! Gosh, I must tell Riza right now."

"No! don't do that!" - Jerome warns her. There's even a deadly pressure from his eyes, like he's going to rip her head anytime.

"Oh why not? Riza is my friend, note! my best friend. She actually doesn't deserve you. From the very start of your relationship I don't really agree with your existence, and I knew that you hurt her many times, but now... seeing it with my own eyes, I'll make sure she'll break up with you right now! and later, I will cut off your d*ck, you filthy man."- she sticks her tongue out, throws her deadly glare to Carl and walk out.

That man has just fooled her, and even use her presence in pretending to be straight.

"You can never do that bitch, because I'll make sure you'll never see the sunrise even your beloved best friend" -Jerome, holds Carl hand and kiss it. "Don't be afraid baby, I can handle her" - reassuring Carl who's hands are sweating.

"Ewww... you two, you can continue your remaining moment, I'll leave"- she said rolling her eyes.

she's not in the mood to argue with the two lovers because she lost her nice present in her birthday.

"How dare you bitch! You will never tell anything to Riza, or else, I will kill you!" - Jerome's at rage, he's really anxious that Riza will broke up with him, there might be an important reason behind it. Maybe It's Riza's wealth that he secures most.

"Fine, fine, I will never tell anything..." she said boringly.

She immediately pick her phone and make her way back to the inn.

"But of course, I will tell everything" she added after a few steps.

In so much anger, Jerome pick up a big rock and smash it to her head causing her to loose consciousness, or probably she's already dead.

Chapter 2

There's no time to waste. Carl has finally agreed to her request. After a month of pestering him, he finally give in.

She jump out from bed, head to her little closet and change her pajamas into her favorite red satin dress.

Repeatedly observing her figure in the mirror making different poses. Suddenly she throw herself and rolled herself over the bed while kicking the air and shrieking silently.

"I'm going cured! Wohoooooo! Ahhhh Carl, such a tough battle!" she scream under her pillow to shut her awful voice.

Not so long, three knocks on her door had immediately cut her celebrating thoughts, causing her heart to jump and her nerves allerted.

"who's that?" -she asked behind her door.

Instead of a reply, she heard another three knocks. (Morse code) There's only one man she knew, who's fond of using encryption in every conversation. He's also the reason why she learn how to use Morse code, just to communicate with him. It's Carl. The campus crush and math genius in their university.

"Very well, you really came" she stated.

She twist the knob and let the man enter... she was rather welcomed by his smile that was bright as the day. There's a few tiny moles near his lips that tempting her most to get nearer to them. His jaw is well defined and his brows is as dark as midnight together with his deep eyes.

"Dan, I'm---" he seems a little shy but still he looks hotter than before.

"Shhhhh, you know that I will never take a no for an answer" She seductively cut him off and stick her fingers unto his lips.

Carl suddendly turns his worried expression into a wide grin and immediately carry her on his arms like a newly wedded couple.

Its just like, Carl just got fired up and get excited all of the sudden.

"Silly girl, you are indeed a master of seduction... No one can ever escape your charm, nor I" - he said, lowering his eyes admirring her healthy chest.

She smile victoriously and clung her arms on his nape and pull his face for a passionate kiss but there's a sudden weird feeling like Carl's gonna drop her anytime like he cannot carry her anymore and she seems to forget something really important, but she just ignored and enjoyed the moment with her current prey.

"Can I kiss you now?" she ask for permission. Carl just smile and nodded, he never thought that a woman like her, will act just like what a real man supposed to do.

Before even meeting his lips, she feels that Carl has starting to loose his grip to her, and shes like getting even more heavier for him.

"Carl don't let me go!" she pleaded but she really did fall on her butt, that force to shut off her eyes hard due to the tinggling pain off the impact on her bottom.

"what the hell Carl, you shouldn't have carry me you can't!" -she hissed, caressing her aching butt.

The sun rays reached her left eye making her twitch with the warm sensation, that couldn't let her eyes see clearly.

Slowly moving on her right side to avoid the blinding light. She suddenly feel the back of her head aches, and her whole body wants to lay on the ground for a few more minutes.

She wanted to gaze upon him but she's actually blinded by the warm sun light behind his figure in front of her. She also had this weird feeling that her room, suddenly becomes brighter.

"What is your name maiden?" a deep man's voice that she's never familiar of, must be reffering to her, but she's not actually sure. There must be someone Carl just bring together with him, so she made herself immediately open her eyes adjusting with the dazzling sun light, just to find out its not actually Carl, that was with her in her room--- or should I say in the forest rather. And there's actually no Carl around, but only a weird man on a weird costume.

Having a good IQ, she assumed. Everything she remembered, was just actually a dream and there's indeed a stranger talking to her in a very weird place! and worst, he's half *****. He's actually wearing only a few peice of cloth covering his below, just like the costumes of actors in precolonial Philippine movies.

"What a weird outfit, this must be another awful dream" she murmured to herself.

"You just had waked up maiden, trust me...you're not dreaming, or if you're not still satisfied... I can repeat what I did a while ago, to prove to you that it is not really a dream, unless you want other method, so must answer my question, before I lose my patience, who are you?"

"Well... I'm..."

**** himself. I'm the one who should ask him with that question. How dare he talk to me like that. He doesn't deserve to know my name. - conscience.

"The hell... where am I?!"- she asked, instead answering his worthless question, expecting he will reply just like a normal conversation in real life. She still thinks it was just a dream.

He, then crossed his arms and she had to gulp voluntarily as his arm muscles twist in every small movements he made. Its like, one wrong move, she'd be a dead meat. He even suits the look of a tribesman that accepts the practice of cannibalism. This man, sure can brought horror to her even it's just a dream.

*Imagined the movies she watch, like wrong turn, Autopsy, Chainsaw *****

Sliding backwards away from the weird man just because of her wild imaginations, finally she remembered how to panic in fear.

He pick up his things that looks like ancient tools in preparing medicines. He put it in his bag made of bamboo and sling it in his body.

As she observe him, he actually looks calm, but she can really feel this intimidating pressence around him. It just feels like he's a cultured version of tarzan. And the moment is surreal.

If its real, she will probably think she had been thrown somewhere in Africa or in amazon. but the man doesn't look like hes just some part of her dream. So, she must be having a real bad dream.

"so your name is the hell?" - he again asked.

She frown at him. "What the hell!" she exclaimed.

"Did I say it wrongly? you are really making me confused, the hell"

"My goodness! that's not my name idiot!"

"What really is your name?"

"I'm Danica Szhiout, or you can just call me Dan Szhiout (sounds like Dan short means bansot)"

"I see, Bansot (bansot in filipino means being short in height)I think your name really suits you well.

" Arghhh I don't need your opinion, you're just ruining my beautiful name! ITS ACTUALLY D.A.N S.Z.H.I.O.U.T NOT BANSOT YOU PRICK! I'm half French and half Filipino. How about you? who are you? what's your name? where you from? where are we? why are you wearing like that, oh my god thus is driving me crazy talking to the man in may dreams"

"My name is Tangkad, and that is all I can tell"

"W--wait?! what?!"

"I must tell you this atleat. you're indeed lucky to enter this place but your luck has ended up today. Sorry but I will never let you leave this place. Not in my rules"

"What the hell are you talking about!?"

"you need to die"

Chapter 3

"What did you say?!--- Arghhh! how dare you!"

Her head began to throb real hard and she start feeling so much pain.

"Hey! help me here! I'm gonna die!"- She held her head and put too much pressure to it to ease the pain.

"You just have died"-Tangkad said nonchalantly.

"Can you stop talking nonsense? My head really hurts its like going to burst, go find a way to cure me! --- my god, It's just a dream but I feel so much pain, and worst I am talking to you, you're not even real. Must kill myself here to end this stupid dream, okay, I can handle this. So Talong, let me have your knife first "

"Its Tangkad"- he corrected her, intentionally changing his name.

"What ever, just the same, go give me your knife" -she extended her hand, give her palm and move her fingers back and forth ordering him like a boss to lend her the knife that she spotted he kept leashed within his right leg.

Danica is so sure and determined that she's just having a nightmare so she must find her way out, with all the idea she knew.

Tangkad just look at Danica's small hand waiting for his knife.

He instead sit on the near rock behind and against his will, he has forced to discuss the matter with the poor woman because of its stubbornness and low comprehension.

While Danica, who have no any idea about the situation feels a bit embarrassed that she was refused by him.

Tangkad bend his knee higher, lowering his back, rest his arm over and put his hand under his chin. He resembles now the prominent figure "the thinker".

"What should I expect with a human like you..." he murmured and sighed.

"Are you cursing me?! bring it on, let me hear that so I can cut you into pieces after I recover--- Arghhh shit! why does it hurt so much! what kind of nightmare is it? somebody out there help me wake up please..." she keep complaining and voicing out her problems but nothing happened.

Tangkad doesn't even care, so he just let her think for a minute before he tell her the truth. He must left her no choice but surrender to offer her life to him.

Preview of what happen: Danica tried to leave the weird man and walk around to explore the place but she never seen anything good but an endless forest. Full of trees and rocks.

She had no choice but to go back.

*A few minutes later*

Danica lean on tree trunk kicking stones under her feet.

*head hurts*

*Look at Tangkad tearfully*

"I told you its not a dream. You're just wasting your new life. Though, its not that precious, you must still cherish this chance to live how you desired to, so that your soul, at least will have no regrets and your death won't go in vain. The pain you feel right now is just an aftershock upon entering the Sacred portal, I presume, you had shattered your memories having a weak internal spirit. So for now, I suggest, must focus on recovering your memories and pain will soon disappear. I must send you to the Babaylans for further investigation, and for your personal questions, you may ask them with that matter"

*Confused*

*Puzzled*

*mess*

*Nose bleeds*

"Huh??!" she look at him with confused expression.

"What death?--- sacred portal?--- Babaylan?--- what the hell--- are you making fun of me?---whatever, let's just end this shit"

Danica bravely manage to get up and slowly walk towards Tangkad, enduring the pain in her head.

Other way around he never bother to stop her, Tangkad just let the poor woman to do what she want. After all he knew sooner or later she will finally gave up.

Danica stand near in front of him even she's a little bit scared of his aura. Her whole body oddly feels weak and exhausted but her belief that he's just a part of her dream, makes her strong together with her innate naughtiness. Might as well used her charm and manipulate her dream to find her way out.

Slowly, she move her face nearer to him and make her hand sneakily reach its way to his right leg where he kept his Gold poniard.

Seductively, she smile at him and bit her lips while he's staring at her cluelessly, but before even reaching a few centimeters, he grab her hand and stop her from doing so.

"What are you doing"- he asked.

She struggle to freed from his grip but she's like an old sickly beggar, with no much strength left.

"I-im just borrowing your knife. If you don't agree, you can let go off my hand, I won't insist anymore"- she said softly changing her attitude and purposely making sounds like pitiful and weak. She just also had learn that there's no point in offending the man in her dream anymore, he's the only one who can help her anyway.

She sits on the ground not far from him and hugs her knee and rest her face on it.

"Why do you need my poniard for?" - he again asked, clearing things up.

Danica's eyes shines bright as she found a hint of success in using her charm. She instantly took the opportunity to try to look even more cuter. She just thought Tangkad will do something to help her.

"Like I said, I will use it to end my life. I had watch this scenario in an anime many times, and It is said to be, that if you can't get out in your dream, then you should kill yourself to get out. So please, pretty please, let me borrow your knife"

*puppy eyes*

Tangkad frowned upon hearing the word anime.

"What is an anime?" he asked with his brows meeting together in confusion.

Danica don't know why she feel excited all of the sudden.

"Its something... kind of a moving drawing that you watch to understand its story, it is the right term for a commonly animated adaptation of manga's and manhua's etc. with hundreds of episode that you will surely watch till you have black circles around your eyes because of its good story line, plot twist and good combination of genres--- you know I really love reading romance and fantasy novels actually, and as a result I ended up watching anime as with romance and fantasy genre as well, and now, you'll never believe me I'm a fan of Redo of healers, you know I say to you, there's no wrong about watching hentai, I must say you should watch! it too! I never let you down, You'll probably like that, you know it always happened to me that my boy flings usually ask for some good recommen-------

*look at Tangkad who's actually listening carefully*

----wait! why the hell I'm explaining to you? you might not even seen television do you?"

"No idea"- he answered.

*just remembered her main intention*

"Ahhh!--- forget it!, you're just part of my anyway, never mind, just give me that gold knife, hurry!"

"You really want to kill your self with this?" - he asked.

"Right!" *nods faster*

"Then why don't you try to smash your head on that rock instead?, the process may be different but I'm sure you'll end up at the same result" - Tangkad said blankly, proposing a hilarious idea.

Holy mother f*cker - conscience

*Jaw drop*

Is he really in my dream? why the hell I feel that I'm in real world at a different place with this weird man? And I seem to forget something... forget it, just focus on the situation. I am the most fearless woman in our university, the most talented and intelligent one. Everybody admires me so I can probably surpass this problem.

"you can also jump over the cliff not far away from here, After you fall, your head will surely smash with sharp rocks below, don't worry I will make sure you'll be dead, if you want this method I'll accompany you" - he added.

Danica has gotten worse confused now. Though Tangkad can give her some idea but honestly, she really want to try the method Tanjiro Kamado used in demons slayer as he scape in his dream. That's why she really want to use his poniard. She even thinks she looks cooler with that stunt and she'll surely write it on her diary when she wake up so she must not forget this part.

he actually has a point with what he said. What's really the difference if I use rock----- conscience.

"Have you decided now? want me to help you smash your head with that rock?" - Tangkad interrupt her thoughts.

*echoed*

"smashed your head with that rock?"

"smashed your head with that rock?"

"smashed your head with that rock?"

*triggers shattered memory*

***flashback***

"Drink more Riza---C'mon! were going get wasted now"

"No more chicken legs? Just gimme Carl's egg"

*Everyone's Laughing*

"Hey sis! Carl goes out"

"I'm going upstairs"

"Have some rest birthday girl"

*Girls cheering*

*Some boys are laughing*

*sign middle finger to her friends*

*That's my girl! bad *** Dan"

"Not your girl anymore"

"No screaming alright?! hahahaha"

*remembering everything*

------- the slumber party on her 18th birthday

------- The trap she make to seduce Carl go in vain

------- She discovered that Carl was a gay and she was fooled by him pretending to have interest in her too but actually has a secret relationship with Riza's boyfriend, Jerome.

*"You can never do that bitch, because I'll make sure you'll never see the sunrise even your beloved best friend." Jerome, holds Carl hand and licked the back of it.

"Ewww... go ahead you two, you can continue your kissing moment, I'll leave" she's not in the mood to argue with the two lovers because she lost her prey on her birthday.

"How dare you! You will never tell anything, to Riza, or else, I will kill you!" Jerome's at rage, he's really anxious that Riza will broke up with him, there might be an important reason behind it. Maybe It's Riza's wealth.

"Fine, fine, I will never tell anything..." she said boringly.

She immediately pick her phone and make her way head back.

"But of course, I will tell everything" she added after a few steps.*

------- She was threatened by Jerome not to spill the bean, but she was too careless that angered him and hitting her with a rock.

------- Eventually loosing her consciousness after a few seconds.

------- Having a dreamed of Carl about her plan for him that she imagined how going to be but it has become futile.

------- Now she's with unknown queer person in an unknown place and she still thinks its still part of one of her worst dream.

"What really had happened to me?" Danica sighs, noticing that her head doesn't hurt anymore.

Tangkad stands up. Walk towards her and lend his hand.

"Now, you must accept your fate...

cause you're already dead"

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