I'll be quick.
"I was 16 back then when I was enchanted by your beaming presence. The pair of my visions couldn't take away those smiles from your lips. My heart thump as I heard you laugh, and my monochromatic life started to have its colorful hues."
We were both sitting on the bench, watching the sun to set. We didn't watch each other's gaze but I know, he's listening silently.
"Isn't it amazing?
How my life was an empty canvas only filled with one color yet you came, you painted this emptiness with different shades of you. At first, I thought this feeling was normal for admiration but as I start to look at you more and more, I realized that this isn't just as simple as admiration as I thought.
That's why I was afraid. I long knew that I don't know how to swim yet my heart was so stubborn and it keep diving deeper towards you and I just recognized one day, I was already drowning in you."
The wind blows stronger as the crickets scream. I tuck some strands of my hair that flew from the wind at the back of my ear. I smile gently as I continue.
"I was a fool believing that if I restrain this feeling silently this soon will fade, however, I didn't understand the feeling of a person. I just learned that if you keep those feelings to yourself the emotions will grow stronger. So here I am, after 10 years of keeping these feelings, I finally had the chance to confess to you.
I love you"
I heard his silent gulp and as the sun finally gave up, he looked at me blankly yet his eyes were filled with confusion. He may be cold but I know what's he's thinking. He might be thinking what's used to telling me this now when everything's too late. What's the use of confessing if I already know what will be his answer.
I just smiled and hug him for once. I didn't let him say words for I felt I'll die if I heard those words from him.
"I know, I know. Thank you for clearly giving me those boundaries when you subconsciously realized my feelings for you. Thank you still for being my greatest friend. All I want is for you to be happy completely and relieve you from burden and pain that's why I'm confessing. Don't worry about me, I'll soon pass these feelings of mine. Thank you for listening and please do make my brother happy in your arms"
After I embraced him, I stood up and leave him hanging on the bench.
I close my eyes to let my tears fall down and sit under a large tree far away from him. As the rain cried, I finally allow my feelings to let go with the endless wind.
To You Who Never Loves Me,
Thank you for the lessons that you taught me. it's finally time to say goodbye.
