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*People Pleaser*
*Part II: The Reveal of the Fakers*
Even after we got into a friendship, Ivan didn't get close to me, I didn't have any problem, but one thing was making me bite myself internally, and that was my friends saying that "Tho the dare was completed it's remained incomplete.''
I don't know what was wrong with that guy who ignored me after that auditorium incident. I tried to chase him so that he will talk to me. Alas! It turned out to be of no use. My friend, Lavendar convinced me not to chase him anymore, I thought about her words, and at last, gave up on that dare; *after all, it was my friend who advised me not to, so I shall think about it.*
Many days later, I got to know that Natasha threw a party and invited half of her classmates in it but not me. I didn't even know that she threw a party, I felt the anger within my nerves frustrating my mind completely with weird thoughts. I stomped near her bench and asked her in a way like she is my property, and I must know every single thing which she does.
"Why didn't you invite me to your party, Natasha?" I shouted which resulted me and Natasha being the centre of attention for everyone.
"Woah, what's with your aura? You look so frustrated, keep yourself cool."
"Cool? You are my best friend, how can you not inform me about your party? You know it very well that how badly I love parties."
"But you don't like to wear traditional clothes, and the theme of that party was to have a traditional look, it was of no use because I knew you wouldn't have accepted the invitation," Natasha said while raising an eyebrow.
"Traditional look? You didn't like that look, then why did you host a party on such a theme?"
"Well, now I find it interesting, that's why I did."
"I would've loved it too, Natasha! You should've invited me!"
"How would you like that theme? Months ago, you said that you dislike it."
" *That is because you disliked it!* "
"Huh?"
"You were the one who didn't like it, *that's why I said that I don't like it either.* "
"WHAT?," Natasha aksed with a disgusted look.
Our conversation was loud, so probably everyone would've heard it, one of the girls said with a laugh, "Wow, you said that you don't like the traditional look just because Natasha doesn't like it?"
I went blank after hearing that sentence from my closest friend, Sophie.
"Don't you have your own opinion to say what you like and what you don't?," Another girl said with a mock.
"Maybe not because she's still the silver-spooned girl of her parents, I am sure that every day she asks her parents if she shall start brushing," Another girl said with a huge grin.
Natasha and my other best friends started to laugh with a nod.
My vision turned blurry when tears started to flow from my eyes.
This... This feels so familiar! I know this feeling.
I haven't felt this for a long time, but now... the same is happening! *I am again a laughing material.*
"Omg, you are a 12th grader and you are crying?," Natasha said while widening her eyes with a laugh.
I was shocked to see that all the people whom I first called my best friends are now laughing at me even after knowing that they are hurting me.
*Is this what you call best friends?*
I was about to leave the classroom with tears, but my eyes met Ivan's. While everyone was laughing, he was simply looking at me. No emotions or reactions, he was simple staring at me.
I felt more embarrassed and dashed towards the balcony, and silently started to cry.
"I... I always did what they like, I always did what they want, now why are they being so rude with me?," I asked while closing my eyes with tears.
"Because they don't consider you ask your friend.," Someone said with a serious tone.
I turned back and saw Ivan looking at me deeply.
"Wh-what?" I stammered.
"They laughed at you even after knowing that it hurt you, such kind of people are never your friends."
I shook my head and said, "Shut up! They are my friends, it's just-"
"Just what?" He interrupted me.
"Saffrina, if you think that they did that all just because it was funny, then you are wrong; it didn't even look like a joke, and even for them if it is, then let me tell you *A joke is cracked when it can make you laugh, not sad or hurt.*"
I was speechless on his words.
"Still you aren't able to believe that they are not your friends?"
I nodded with a yes and replied, "They are my friends since standard 6th, how can you say that they don't consider me as a friend?"
Ivan laughed and said, " *_You considering others as your friends doesn't mean that they consider you too._* "
I looked at him with a blank face because I knew that at some point he was correct.
Suddenly, he grabbed my hand and brought me near the classroom's doorstep and told me to hear what Natasha and Sophie says.
"Oh, my, my! That girl is so stupid! She still thinks you as your best friend and me as her closest friend, Natasha!," Sophie said with a laugh.
"Yes! Her smartness is only applicable for studies, on other things she is always dumb!"
"Right, didn't you see how she ran away from the class like a crybaby?"
"I saw it! I never liked her in the first place and always wanted to have such a scene, luckily I was able to see one." Natasha smirked at Sophie.
"We can have such a scene again if we will tell her the truth that the whole class of ours are her friends because they want her to give them assignments and help her in exams!"
"Don't let her know that, Sophie, or else we will never get a chance to pass our exams."
Sophie and Natasha both laughed out loud which made me tearier.
Does that mean... *Till now for the people I have given my all best are the ones who think ill about me?*
My feet went cold, Ivan pulled me near the balcony.
"I hope that you will trust your eyes and ears now." He said looking at me with anger.
" *I- I always pleased them with everything they wanted, I helped them whenever they needed, I did all the things which made them happy, then why is God letting me suffer like this? I have always given happiness to others, then why...?* "
" _Spreading happiness is good, but we shall remember that we must be happy too._" Ivan responded.
"Huh?"
"Till now, you have always done things for others but not for yourself, you have always pleased others because you knew that pleasing others will give you everything you want; friends, love, admiration, attention, everything! But you forgot *doing things which you will love will give you satisfaction which no other thing can give it to you.* Rather than searching for friends, chasing admiration and attention from others, if you would've given a little attention and admiration to yourself, you wouldn't have faced such type of situation."
I was speechless by his words, how did he get that I was doing this all because I wanted others to be attentive to me?
"How did you get it all?" I asked with curiosity marked all over my face.
"I told you, your smile and eyes speak even you fake it."
"Huh?"
"Yesterday, we all got our mark sheets, you got A grade while others got B or C grade, you are in 12th, you should be happy after knowing that you got such a great grade, *but you looked at the mark sheet with a blank reaction and later smiled to show you are happy. I don't know but I felt that... _you weren't happy looking at that grade may be because you didn't work hard to get it for knowledge and yourself._*"
I had no words for this. He is a face and mind reader, isn't he?
"Do you know how to read minds and faces?," I asked.
"No, but I can feel it." He gave me a bitter smile.
That bitter smile didn't feel like it was for me but someone else...
"Today, give a look at the mirror for some time, I hope it will help you more than my words would." Saying this line, he left me behind and walked towards the classroom.
What did he mean by it?
*At home*
As his words were too shocking for me, I thought to look at myself in the mirror. I seriously stared at myself for nearly 10 minutes and got nothing to see just my bored face with lazy eyes. I started to feel sleepy, but I was curious too to know why he wanted me to look at the mirror, so at last, I thought to look at the mirror more deeply and thought that maybe _I will find something after looking at it._
5 minutes went like that, but I kept my focus on it, and soon something happened... I saw someone in that mirror.
No one can deny the fact that *_When you try to look at a particular thing for a reason, you will surely find something_* ,and that's what happened.
My eyes got widened when I saw a little girl looking at me with tears. She had a very big red slapped mark on her cheek, she had a book and pencil in her hand, and with them, her hands were shivering. Her clothes were a little torn, and that girl was crying badly, so badly that if she will keep on crying for more than 5 minutes, an ocean will form. I observed that girl clearly, and after some seconds, I got who she was... *She was me...* The young 5th grader girl got bullied by her classmates and slapped by her parents.
*To Be Continued*
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