let it out. go ahead. you don't deserve what's happening to you, but that doesn't mean you should stop being nice.
you can find joy in spreading it to others, and while some may find it fun to bring you down, it's slowly destroying their soul. maybe talk to god?
take a shower. listen to happy music, not sad music. jam out. read a book. take a break from your phone. write a to do list. doodle. write in your bullet journal. cry into someone's arms. you got this, you're going to be okay, and in a year it won't matter as long as you learn to get yourself back together. love yourself.
you've a lot of people in your life who loves you.
:)
