'You can do it Maya! Just a few more years!' I cheered myself up with pure determination and confidence in my perseverance.
I was never the talented type. Nor was I smart enough to be considered competent much less a genius.
I've always relied on my diligence and efforts. I always exert thrice the effort normal people dedicate to their studies.
I forwent having friends, fun, relaxation, and leisurely activities. All for that one dream.
That is to rise from poverty and become a competent salarywoman.
Being pretty doesn't matter. Having friends doesn't matter. Having a loved one to share my hardships doesn't.
There's only myself to rely on.
It wasn't a surprise that life became monotonous. All that I see and that followed my wake are grey and dull colors.
From my appearance to my physique to the colors I prefer and the clothes I wear, everything is about me is extremely dull.
So I have to do my best. I have to try harder. If I can't do it with just thrice the normal efforts then I'll do it six times-... no, ten times the effort!
"You can do it Maya!" These are the words I always tell my reflection every morning and every time I'm having a hard time.
Everything was going well. My dreams are already in my reach.
My credentials are okay. My grades are very okay. My Thesis is extremely okay.
And my personal life was a thousand times more okay. And it was all because of him.
"I know you can do it Maya. I believe in you." My teacher smiled like a ray of sunshine in my life.
When no one is taking me seriously, he did. When no one believed in me, he did. When I needed comfort the most, his mere presence made feel safe and secured.
Because he was my teacher from whom I've learnt so much from, my adviser who guided me when I'm having difficulties, and the person encouraged me to do better when I was only opting for the 'only okay' options.
He was everywhere in my life and made everyday seem filled with nothing but good possibilities.
With him around, nothing seemed so hard at all.
And I realized he was the one, the one and only person, that I couldn't imagine not having in my life at all.
I'm pretty sure we won't work together because he deserves a woman so much better than me. And I am too unqualified for him.
So I settled for just being able to stay with him.
But that too became hard at some point. Because we could never be together. It's not possible for us to be together.
It's not right for us to be together.
And then a miracle came. So unbelievable I decided I needed some time to let everything sink in. I needed more time to ensure everything was real. And that there definitely is no turning back for us.
I took a break from school which made me restless and doubtful the whole time.
Am I doing it right?
Did I make the right decision?
What if he finds somebody else?
What of he suddenly turns around and takes back his words?
But soon I calmed down.
If he finds somebody else then my decision was right. At least we won't have to regret too much. And that it wouldn't hurt too much.
But if he stays true and his feelings won't change after making him wait for me a bit more longer,
I will risk everything to me.
I was never good at anything. I was neither smart nor talented. And I was not even pretty enough to compete with other women.
But I believe in my stubborn perseverance and diligence.
I will love him and try my very best to keep him with me. I will exert as much effort as possible to be with him and for him to never get tired of me.
I smiled when I saw his figure standing in a crowd of people waiting for my arrival.
"Sean!" I called out and ran as fast as I could towards him.
Now that I'm sure I love you enough to risk it all, I will never let you go.
〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Author's Note〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜
I'm not a skilled writer so my stories may look dull often times. But I hope you will end up appreciating my works enough to make you want to support it and subscribe for it.
Thanks for reading this Postory!
- NorShaTa -
