I was quite not a normal girl.I was already 15 years old yet not like others , I don't have interest in love and i don't want to talk about it ,specially with my parents.I have seen and read many love stories but still,I dont have interest of it.I thought it was just a childish emotion where someone fall in love with each other,goin into dates but at the end they were just gonna break up with silly reasons.But......Not until i already felt it.
I was in second year of highschool where i was still the same.First day of school and everyting is new.There are some new classmate and new teachers.I have some of my classmates and friends last schoolyear too.I was really excited.
As the day pass one by one,my view of falling for someone was still the same not until i met him.
He was in another section when i was in the first year.We barely see each other or more likely ,we dont know each other.He was quite shy and quit.That was my first impression.But i was wrong.He is so playful and friendly.In a short period of time he already have lot of friends.And...I was the one of them.I dont know how it start but we really became close.We're always chatting through personal and to socialmedia.I dont know but im getting used to it.
There was also a girl from my class who became my friend.We are not that close at first cause she's from another section last year just like him.We also became friends.Really close friend.You can say that cause I can open my real feelings to her,like sometime i was really down and i can't take it anymore ,she was really there for me.Well actually i'm not open about my feelings.I always kept them even with my parents.But we both understand each other so i can openly say what i really thought.And she is really important to me.I dont want to lose her.
In our class we are assigned to do some dance.And we, he and i was in the same group.I was happy and excited about it . It was weird actually.It always happens.Every time i see him smile ,laugh,or talk to me,my heart was beating really fast.Its weird,very weird.After our class we have a dance practice.While were resting were playing together with our classmates.It was really happy.
But sometimes its quite awkward.After our practice we decided to go home together with some of our classmates.I intentionally sat beside him .Because of that some of my friends are teasing us.Specially when the jeepney suddenly brake and i accidentally lean close to him.We ar both really shocked and embarrased about it,specially me.And you can really see in my friends eyes that they were teasing us.I was really embarrased that i did not chat him that night.It was really funny when i recall it.
Atlast we finished our dance and because of happiness ,our group leader demand a group hug.He was right next to me when we did that.We hugged... We hugged...I cant explain how my heart beating soo fast and dont know what to do.Even though its a group hug,our body got really close to each other.My heartbeat is soo fast that i dont know what to do.
That night i cant sleep thinking of it."Its impossible" i said .I cant believe what i found."I like him?" i mumble.I cant believe it and i dont want to believe it.But its not my choice to decide.The next day i tried to avoid him.I was not sure if i trully like him.Maybe thats because he was just friendly to me.But it really is.I like him no matter how hard i try to avoid it.
I want to tell my friend about my feelings.I was goin to find her and tell her about it but before i say it she said first that she like someone...and thats him. I was surprised about it and at the same time i was really sad.How can this be? After hearing the words she said i dont wanna tell her about how i feel towards him.I kept it all by my self.Ofcourse with that handsome face and friendly attitude of him,who cant like him?
This is my first time to fall inlove but i have to gave up.Well,i dont have a courage to confess and i dont really intend to, cause that is not gonna work.He and i are different .No matter how you ganna see it ,were not gonna work.
It hurts to see him smile but not to me.He is happy but not because of me.Im jealous but i dont have the rights.I dont know if i regret about it but i hope he is happy.
Im still young and i know its not the time for that.When the time comes and im gonna fall again,I dont wanna give up.I wish i have the courage to fight for it.
---Its my own story.I just wanna share it.❤❤❤
Thank u .
