Age 3:
The door of psychiatric facility opened and three people (2 men in mid 30s, 1 woman in early 30s ) came in view. Father with long hairs till shoulders, a handsome looking man in a military Uniform possibly a high rank and a pitiet woman about 5 feet came in view. ah! what a lovely lady I wondered.
'lily' father called me softly but I quivered after seeing my mother dying in front of me I had PTSD so I despised touch of every man including father. Running to & fro frantically searching for a a safe place finally decided to shut my ears with ear plugs and wrap myself in the blanket under the bed shivering with fear.
Those people weren't shocked by my reaction they were calm as if they expected it. Suddenly the lovely lady started twirling around dancing in air (fewtime on toes & most of time in air Jumping it was ballet but as a 3 yr old I just knew DANCE means shaking & moving bodies with sound called rhythm) I was able to see her legs in air too.. for a moment I thought fairy came to save me but she didn't have any wings may be they were invisible. The man in uniform was definitely enjoying her performance but his keen eyes never left the place under the bed.
Removing my plugs I found she was singing in a melodious voice too. I confirmed she is a fairy and came infront of her she bent down stretched her hand but didn't touch me as if asking my permission I was frustrated, why is this fairy not touching me so I took her hand and put it on my cheeks. She gave me a shocked look but looking at my cushion soft cheeks she felt like touching clouds and it melted heart.
No one in whole facility expected me to take and initiate human touch that too with a stranger woman. In a shaking voice I pleaded in a childish tone, "faily..(fairy) save me" There was dead silence all three people were stunned and stood rooted without breathing, my father turned towards wall hiding his emotions he understood he isn't capable of giving safe place to his only daughter he already lost his wife, this little girl is only person left but because of his identity he can't help her he has to give her up. He cursed himself for being an unless husband and father.
The stunned fairy lady was filled with emotions and hugged me tightly without permission. I also felt my shoulders wet I thought she wanted to blow her nose on my dress but she being a fairy and me being a big hearted person let it go but after I grew up I understood it wasn't snot but they were tears of pity those doe like eyes had for me who was suffering from PTSD and endless nightmares since my mother's death.
All this time the man in uniform had his eyes set on me. I felt someone watching me so I looked up and met with those brown eyes with a stern look.
As soon as we made eye contact a gentle smile bloomed on his handsome face which made my heart race. I couldn't take my eyes from that smile. This smile was only seen by me as a clingy fairy was hugging me and an emotional father was busy facing wall. His smile assured me that I have had enough and this time you reached home.
My mother once told me that people with this uniform (military or police) are angels for normal people like us but they become devil for bad people like the terrorist I knew he was one of those angels.
There I understood 'Yes, I reached home'
The lady looked up to him he hid his smile sensing her turning towards him but I knew he was trying to suppress it. She spoke up ,"I like her very much." his eyes shone for a second but he composed himself and nodded with a strict "hmm".
I was over the moon when fairy said she liked me. I smiled which couldn't be hidden any one. My father already turned when lady spoke who was about to hug me but I hid under the skirt of fairy quickly to escape from his clutches showing him I still hold grudges. This time the uniform man really wanted to hide his smile but he couldn't he bent down but keeping his head high he told me "if you want to be with fairy you will have to call me Dad first?"
What type of joke is this angelman playing with I didn't even called my father Papa yet and this angelman wants to be my dad. My innocent eyes peeked from behind the skirt of fairy only to start a stare competition with the angelman he then added , "if you don't we will leave immediately." he smirked.
I screamed internally, "mommy I miss you this aneglman will take my fairy away isn't he supposed to be sweet and caring for bighearted lily like me.....No i can't let him take my fairy away I have to do something but what can the little me do....fine you win this time i give up." looking straight into his eyes I called out in my lowest voice,"D..dad" hid under skirt again. with that all adults burst into laughter. I was so embarrassed that I didn't leave when my Father tried hard to use same trick to make me call him PAPA, but this time I didn't leave fairy's legs so he had to leave with angelman in vain.
This was the day I met my adoptive parents
This is the day I Lily Vielli-era started my new life into full of adventure, love , sacrifice, patriotism and moments if tough life changing decisions.
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