One day, my teacher asked our class a random question. She's a teacher that sometimes a friend that gives wisdom and advice.
I'm in my last year of Psychology and her class is my favorite maybe because it was related to my field of study.
"Class, if you had given the chance to go back to your past what will you do to change your past?"
My classmates began to think about their answers. Some of my classmates are exchanging thoughts and some are reminiscing about their past. Our class president raises his hand.
"Ma'am I would be lucky to change my past if I had given a chance. I would probably gather enough courage to confess my feelings to my first love"
"Oh, so you got tongue-tied? Well, sometimes we chose to keep our feelings to ourselves without trying all the possibilities because we are afraid of rejection. Thank you so Mr. class president for sharing your thoughts"
"Next, who wants to share your answer?" She asked. "Yes, Ms. Zusana"
"I would probably avoid my exes because they leave me believing all their sweet tongue that full of lies"
"So, what did you learn about your past relationship?"
"I learn?... I learned that I shouldn't fall in physical appearance"
My classmates started to laugh because Zusana is always bragging about handsome boys and it was irony to her answer.
"Silence class, I will give you advice about outside appearances. There's nothing wrong if we attracted to the opposite sex in physical appearance like if it's our first time to meet him or her we always find the face should be meet our ideal, in fact, that was a normal reaction. But do you know what's wrong with that way of thinking? We are too shallow because we judge the book by its cover. We never intended to look at the beauty inside. I hope that everyone must grow"
I just contemplating everything when almost all of my classmates share their thoughts. Their answers are somewhat similar to others but some have a different insight. Some of them want to change their mistakes and the wrong decisions they made in the past.
"Ms. Alice how about you? What will you do to change your past?" The class became silent and they looked at me, as they are waiting for my answer.
"I will not do anything"
"What do you mean Ms. Alice?"
"I would rather continue moving forward than going back to the past. If I go back to my past, my sufferings and pain that I felt and buried in my past will be repeated until my heart becomes numb. I don't want to see my parents and my siblings crashed in a car accident. I don't want to go through so much depression of being alone. I don't want to meet again and trusted those people who betrayed me. I don't want to meet those people that almost sexually assaulted me and I don't want to see myself hopeless again in the four corners of the lonely dark room waiting for someone that even to my self was unsure that someone will find me and help to see the lights" My tears falling in my cheeks and everyone's reactions were shocked and they even shed tears in the story that I shared, the unfold story of my mother.
How about you? What will you do to change your past?
