"Ignorance is a bliss" they said. Well, there are things that should be kept unknown because once you unfold that mystery your world will torn apart.
10:00pm, the light has come to an end and yet neither the moon nor the stars are showing up.
The sky looks gloomy as if it was hurt by the sorrowing clouds and it seems like the heaven will burst in tears with loud sobs.
But still, I found myself sitting in this comfortable yet uncomfortable chair while my two hands are intertwining above this long table with a worried and anxious expression.
Was I too over confident that he will choose me than to that person who's repeatedly hurting him? Or am I just a clown fooling myself to this false hope?
I'm not a Queen nor am I an Empress, even then I'm not a God but I've been manipulating the world 7years since and their are many people whose been witnessed how did I controlled it.
But why can't I even say a word to this man?
Why can't I even predict his feelings? Why can't I even order my heart to stop this loud bangs its, making? Ah...it's because of this pathetic phenomenon mysterious feelings called Love.
" Miss A, aren't you going home? The book signing was already over since dusk but yet you're still sitting there for hours now as if you were waiting for specific someone ."
I secretly flinched and clenched as I disappointingly looked at the staff who's looking at me with sympathy while holding a broom and dustpan. I avoided that pity looked and once again, I gazed the clock to checked the time only to find out that it's already 11:30.
I sighed and bit my lip, desperately suppressing my tears from streaming and hoping that no sound of pain will come out.
"A—ah yeah. I'm sorry for being a burden and thank you for your hard work. See you when I see you!" I said, then tremblingly stand up not minding my numbing toes and knees who's getting tired.
" You too Miss! Goodbye!"
I flashed a small smile as I pulled the door to this bookstore, then I go out. I walked to this alley while embracing this cold wind while rubbing my left shoulder hoping that I can comfort myself.
And as I halt after 10 steps of walking, I sighed and decided to let out this despairing tears but then before I could let out this liquids, I unconsciously lifted my head and a glimpse of hope suddenly came.
The man that I've been looking for, waiting for, dying for, longing for. Was rapidly running as much as he can towards me.
My heart thump, my eyes glistened and I can't help to smile widely as I saw how desperate he was to come near me.
Did he choose me over her? Am I going to have the victory? He's really a ticking time bomb holding the reality of this feelings.
As I ready to greet him and accept him with open arms, he stopped and kneel in front of me.
I don't know why but I'm getting nervous.
He then lifted his head and looked at me.
And as the pain of heaven can't suppress anymore and as the agony of this sky can't hold any longer the cold grieving tears starting to fall.
He then said this words stuttering while his liquids began to release from his miserable eyes.
" I'm s—sorry if I d—didn't make it. I—It just...she needs me more than you do."
And In that time, I realized. That after all, I'm just really his best friend.
