Love at first site ๐... Sounds very common nowadays.. right?๐ซข
I don't know about it much but I just know is.. he become my addiction from the day I saw him... (โ โโ โขโ แดโ โขโ โโ )
(APRIL 2019)
First day of my 6th standard (bruh I know I'm too young but isn't it also common nowadays ๐)... I step inside my class with that as always innocent and boring chubby face of mine ๐ถโ๐ซ๏ธ (I am not fat just little healthy okay ๐)... At first I was looking for my friend.. I was seeing many new faces not for the first time but we got shuffling of our class sections that year... I was seeing many students of different sections in our class as they shifted too our section and many of my classmates also shifted to other sections and I was feeling nothing by thinking that I got another classmates ๐.. (I am a type of girl who doesn't care much about others and surroundings ๐).. But my eyes caught one handsome face ๐
I thought - "gosh seriously I never knew we got such a charming boy in our other sections ๐"
(Ahem- I lost my innocence at the age of 10 only ๐ถโ๐ซ๏ธ)
We were in different sections before but after shuffling.. we got into same class.. ใโ (โ ๊ชโ ๊ณโ ๊ชโ )โ ใ
The first time when I saw him I developed some feelings for him ๐... I told my friends and they teased me very much ๐ฅน and that day my eyes didn't left his sight even for once ๐
Days passed like that.. crushing and dieing over him ๐..
The most funny part of those days was I used to count how many times he looked at me or how many times our eyes met each other ๐คช... 1 point for his glance at me and 2 points for eyes meeting.. ๐ซฃ
And you can't imagine my happiness level when the points cross 100.. ๐คฃ๐คฃ... And literally my friends were gone crazy because of my over craziness over him ๐คฏ..
One day one of my classmate gave me a dare to say the first 3 letter of my crush's name.. I was nervous but I said his name as he wasn't there.. but they suspected me and guessed his name and told him that I like him ๐คง.. But than I controlled the situation by making another name by those 3 letters and said he (fictional boy) is my neighbour and I have crush on him...๐ค
But from that day.. his thoughts for me changed..๐ฅบ (not like that but the weird yet normal stare which we give to others after knowing they like us)..
I used to write my feelings in a diary and the most bad habits of my parents was to find those diaries and scold me ๐.. it was literally their favourite hobby...
They got my diary and read about him.. and after that don't imagine what happened with me.. I didn't did anything except having a minor crush on him still if you could see me.. you had seen those red stick marks all over my body ๐ซฅ.. my parents are hella strict and possessive.. sometimes it seems like a curse to be their daughter but a cunning girl like me really deserve that type of treatments to stay in track ๐๐ค (did I exposed myself ๐ค)
Well day passed like that and our final started.. I am not a good student nor he but he is smarter than me ๐ซฃ.. we both passed with an average good marks and promoted to 7th standard..
I was excited until...
Mr. CORONA VIRUS UNCLE came ๐..
Then online classes started but none of us onn the camera ๐..
(My fun days ๐ฝ)
8th standard also went like that.. but there wasn't a single day gone when I didn't thought about him ๐ณ.. He stayed in my mind all day and night.. Evey hour every minute every second.. and that's how I realised.. it can't be a minor crush ๐.. IT CAN NEVER BE A MINOR CRUSH.. ๐ฅด
I WAS DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH HIM.. I AM OBSESSED WITH HIS PRESENCE AND ADDICTED TO HIS THOUGHTS.. ๐คฉ
I WAS AND STILL CRAZY FOR HIM AND OVER HIM..๐
2022..
9th standard..
I was going to go to school after 2 f*cking years.. I went.. and saw him.. as always.. with his girl best friend ๐ฅฒ.. not his girl friend but girl bestie..
Lol I am also confused by their relationship and I tried to know more about what's going on between them but I never got something like that.. I have always been happy thinking nothing is going on between them ๐ (god knows their relationship ๐).. But I get very jelous whenever they comes too close like hugging or holding hand or sitting with each other like HELL WHY CANT I BE IN HER PLACE ๐ฌ๐ฌ... but I suppressed my anger by thinking - "it's good that I am not in her place.. what if he takes her as a sister ๐"
Days passes and my craziness over him get lowered.. by appearance but from inside I was the same crazy girl and I am still ๐๐ซฃ..
Days passed like that and we got promoted to class 10th ๐ฎโ๐จ.. I got very bad marks and dissapointed my parents badly and imagine what happened after that๐ซฅ๐ซฅ.. I still can feel the pain when I remember that day... it was very painful ๐ฅบ...
Finally
2023..
It's my last year of school.. I am happy thinking finally I don't have to suffer the school torture anymore ๐.. yet very very sad that I'll get separated from him ๐..
I don't know about his feelings but I mostly find him staring at me and sometimes our eyes also meets with each other ๐ณ.. but I seriously don't know what he thinks about me ๐ like.. dude I'm not that ugly to be get ignored ๐ฅฒ.. but the sad thing is he likes to be friends with popular girls like toppers ๐คงand sl*ts for timepass (not like that but he likes to make fun of sl*ts that's why he jokes around them and make fun of them.. but poor sl*ts.. they laugh at themselves ๐)
I don't know what should I do to be his friend and come closer to him ๐ถ.. He rarely talks with me or say.. never ๐...
You know what I like the most about him..
He is creative ๐, dominant ๐ถโ๐ซ๏ธ (bossy bossy ๐ช๐ช), a gentleman ๐ฅธ yet a naughty kid ๐, not so innocent ๐ but knows how to respect๐ , he is se*y bruh ๐, he loves to dance ๐บ, he is not a topper but also not a losser ๐ค , He never misbehaves with anyone without any reason or never raise his voice in front of any girl ๐ซ , he is such a husband/ boyfriend material ๐ณ, He rarely gets angry (I have never seen him angry)๐ค, he is childish yet mature ๐ป, he is cunning but understanding ๐... Totally my type ๐ซถ...
(Sometimes he embarrasse himself.. it seems it's his favourite thing to do ๐คญ๐คญ.. he is really clumsy)
I wish I could have been with him, but sadly we aren't mean to be together ๐.. I don't know if I could able to forget him in future ๐.. I am badly addicted to him, he is my drug ๐...