I've burned too many lands and have taken too many lives. If there exists an after life, my wife will despise me even more for what I've become.
"Your Grace, Lady Julianne wish for an audience." Rene respectfully bowed. He was the only son of the man who was like a second father to me. Now both of us linger in memories of the past. Unwilling to let go, unwilling to forgive.
"Escort her to her room. I have no time to mind her nonsense." Eleazar spoke with a deep frown. He will never be able to bring himself to respect the woman who forced a marriage with him.
If not for her offering information about how and why his father, his wife, and his mother died, he would've never let her stain the Renault name. Her greed knows no bounds. Her regard for life was non-existent. She burned villages to suit her cause. She is no saint but a wretch draped in flawless satin, pretending to be clean.
That woman pledged not to want anything beyond marriage so long as he allows her and her bastard son to become Renaults through marriage. But it didn't take long for her to behave like the other tramps who'd dared approach him after his beloved wife died.
She often approached me barely clothed or barged into my chambers in provocative apparels. She thought she could earn my affection after marriage. But as a respond to her brainless acts, I sent her son to a far away boarding school.
Yet instead of feeling sad, she used every means to promote our pure love as a couple to society, much to my distaste. I ordered the reduction of her spending budget lest she engages in more nonsense that tarnish my beloved wife's honor. But she remained steadfast with her actions.
I knew for certain it wasn't me she wanted but the Grand Duchy she hopes she'll have once I die. She knows I don't have much time left as I have used drastic means to avenge my wife. She wants legitimacy which she thought she had already earned. But I never signed our wedding contract. It was submitted to the church for safekeeping, not for approval. If she dares claim the Grand Duchy for herself, it will be revealed for the entire world to see. If she stays within boundaries allowed for her, she'll survive as the honorable Dowager Grand Duchess, as much as I hate it since those words are only deserved by great women who have led the Grand Duchy wisely.
I closed the ledger I was reviewing with an exasperated sigh. To ease my frustrations, I reached towards a pair of rings hanging on silver chain around my neck.
"I miss you dearly, my wife."
