If you fall in love with me don't.
This is not some teenager's cliche poem about her childhood and suffering from the lack of a role model. Because that would be such a terrible lie. And my father raised a daughter with a guilty conscience. Not a liar.Anyways. I'm here to warn you about what you're getting yourself into.
I smile by habit, not by choice. I giggle out of empathy, and humor, or embarrassment but never to personally spite. I get jealous when I see that someone can provide for other people in a way that I can't. But it's all because I'm a people pleaser. And us people-pleasers just wanna give all we have away because we know it will make someone happy.
And I go through phases just like the moon. But I always complete my lunar cycle. Then return to my bright self again.
And you probably should know that I'm emotional. Like really emotional.
I may even have you fooled about the way I'm feeling. But because my dad didn't raise a liar I am forced to unintentionally wear my big sobby heart on my sleeve.
Oh and I forgot to mention that I'll let something slide 1276 times but after that, I don't give second chances.
I'm also an incredibly all or nothing person. At least to a fault but when I'm interested in somebody. I rather lose everything good I have before I even consider declaring bankruptcy.
But remember there are two sides to every coin. So if you fall in love with me don't. Because in every lunar cycle the moon will disappear for a while because it even has a dark side too.
Like I said I am a people pleasure and us people-pleasers pour. I'll keep filling and filling your glass until its overflowing and until mine is empty.
Because to see you hydrated is all I could ever want in this world. Until I realize it's left me drained.
When I'm drained. I'll get frustrated and then sometimes ill go into hiding.
I'll either take a solo hike or get on my board and will skate until I get my distance, peace and alone time But don't worry because I will eventually turn around and come home again.
Oh and I totally love kids. But it depresses me to know that eventually they will either get swallowed by a selfishly hungry group of kids or explode and die because of there feelings. But that's clearly beside the overall initial point. The point is I am a tangled mess of contactable things but I'm not saying these to scare you.
I'm saying this to warn you and protect you. Also to properly love you, I need you to know not to worry about a single thing. Because remember I am an all or nothing person.
So if I fall in love, I am all in for you. So if you somehow fall in love with me don't because I won't be limited to loving you.
But I'll be head over heels for your smile, your giggles, The face you make when you're embarrassed, and the look in your eyes when I know you're jealous.
I'll fall in love with the way you endlessly try to please people and how it drives you crazy that it's never enough. or how you selfishly pour your pitcher to hydrate someone else even though you're parched. I'll fall in love with your phases both dark and bright, and how some times you might go into hiding when you're frustrated. I'll fall in love with how you pretend you're not emotional despite the fact your feelings are trying so hard to escape.
God your eyes and that special way you recharge yourself when you feel drained. I'll even love your heart after you've given your last second chance to someone for the 1276th time. Because I know your a tangled mess of contradictory things. So please don't just fall in love with me, because I'm not just going to fall in love with you “ Just you“ you're too complex and complicated for it to be that simple, so all I ask for is that.
If you fall in love with me don't, you'll fall in love with my infinite complexities too. So if you fall in love with me don't.
...my favourite Poetry... and a small message...
