Kissed by Death

'𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐝𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞'

I’m sure most of us have heard metaphors, personifications, and whatnot regarding death. Many famous quotes, poems regarding this topic as well.

As an avid reader of para science, I used to believe in that famously quoted line, that death indeed was an adventure for the soul and there was possibly life after death or experiences after physical mortality.

Though it might sound morbid, I have to admit that I was always curious regarding death and what takes place or what happens after, until I experienced it on my own.

It happened one day when I was hospitalized-

‘’𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘴.”

“𝘎𝘰𝘯𝘦?”, I asked fully knowing the meaning behind the word.

*𝐂𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐭*

“𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘥... 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘴.”, they said.

That chilling words made me realize that I had indeed experienced something that very few would have and possibly came back to life to tell the tale.

Each word they uttered and them describing the events in detail made my blood run cold.

And I will tell you that it is not how any of us had envisioned regarding this.

Many of us believe in the soul concept but I'll tell you no such thing exists. There’s no such thing as soul separating from your body, no soul traveling (like astral projection), or anything of those sorts.

I know it's difficult to believe. And trust me I'm having a hard time believing it as well and I wouldn’t either if I had not experienced it myself.

I tell this because I never felt any such thing, for it was only darkness and you don’t remember that darkness as well unless of course, you come back alive.

Your senses don’t work meaning that you can’t hear, see, feel someone’s touch, pain, nothing. Nothing at all. You don’t even have dreams or thoughts. Zero brain activity.

The only reason I remember that it was dark is because I somehow ended up coming back alive, a miracle. And the things I remember are also when my brain activity started back.

The last thing I remember is me being drowsy and my next memory is that of waking in the ICU plugged into the machines.

These all felt like a second or a minute to me but it was more than that, I was out for eight hours and I died in between that time. Eight hours of nothing. No memories, not even an ink of what happened to me.

Remembering that time makes me feel uncomfortable and hurts my brain. I keep feeling like I'm missing something, like my memories when I don’t have any memories.

I always imagined that my thoughts would remain after I died, my memories would be intact with my soul, and that I would have an adventure, just like a dream.

It sounds stupid but yeah that’s what I had always thought- A soul that is finally free and, on an adventure, to explore the unknown.

But the bitter truth is, there’s no such thing and it’s all just something we have created to make us accept and be more open to the concept of death as a part of our life cycle.

This concept of the soul feels like it is something that we humans have made up just to console ourselves and to protect us from the cold hard truth.

At this point, I am having a hard time believing my experience and I am confused and scared thinking about that.

I also feel like my brain might make up false memories regarding the events described just to not feel that blank in my memory. And the thought of that happening as each day passes by makes me scared.

And that’s weirdly interesting when I think about it because it reminds me of the fact of how amazing and dangerous the human brain can be. And the weirdest part about this is, my brain is the one making up these thoughts about itself.

'𝘈𝘮 𝘐 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺?'

I have questioned that too and maybe I might be losing it but it doesn’t change the fact that I have experienced something unbelievable which is haunting me.

And with each day passing by, I'm reminded of the fact that-

𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒌𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒂 𝒎𝒊𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒍𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒆.