I finally finished high school i just graduated,high school life was kind of exciting for me and I'm a little nervous before our graduation day i go to the hospital to check up. Me and my boy best friend were going on the same college i had a crush on him maybe over 6 years already i don't have a courage to confess so i just pretend that I don't have any feeling for him. He had a girlfriend so of course me the friend should support him. Stupid right? All i can do is help him to prepare his date and support him even if it's hurt i think i can still handle it. But I'm always asking myself how long can i handle the pain? But the most stupid thing i did for him is i prepare for their anniversary i did everything he asked me if i can take a picture of both of them kissing under the blue beautiful moonlight. He's so gentle he even said the cruelest word but in a gentle tune. It hurt so much I can't even bare to look at it but what the hell can i do. I'm just a friend. Just a friend to him. Nothing else.
Finally the result come out and the doctor and i talked im shocked when he said i had leukemia and i only have a several days left i bite my lips and try to hold back my tears. But i can't, a single tear drop in my cheek. I was trembling walking out on the room. I lean on the wall griping the test result. Then my cellphone ring i picked up and that my best friend
"Did you already prepared our date for our anniversary?" I was trembling holding the phone i wiped my tears and i answer him "yeah.." i was trying to calm my voice and hung up the phone my legs were suddenly feel weak i collapsed on the ground holding the paper. I cry that i can't even breath i feel like my heart suddenly stop pumping it hurts..hurts....
After that i went back home and he texted me
" Don't be late make sure that everything is all prepared.. thanks " my brother asked me if I'm okay i said yes i run into my room and get ready to go on the venue. I tell the driver that i will go alone i was driving so fast,when i reach the venue both of them were finish eating. When he saw me he asked to take a picture already. I took a picture of them kissing i suddenly feel bitterness i feel like all the feeling i have for him was just gone with a one blow of a wind. After i finished taking pictures he asked me to go home.
He didn't even asked how are you? Are you okay? Are you sick? Do you have something to say? Can i drive you home as thank you for all you've done!..none of them he didn't care about me at all I'm just a stupid slave who followed him and do everything for him..i was an idiot,stupid. Next morning i got up because I heard some noise it turns out that's my friend. He said if he can talk to me i go downstairs and asked him if we can talk somewhere. We talked the study room i thought he came for me but that was just my thoughts. He came early in the morning to scold me because i forgot to do the other surprise. He suddenly raised his voice to me and i got shocked because he didn't do that to me. I look up and give him a bitter smile and i said "I'm sorry so if there's nothing else can you please get out? I'm begging you..." He didn't even say any word and just go out...when he got out my tears was dropping endlessly I can't stop even if i want to it hurts so much. He's tearing me apart and now i feel like his breaking me into pieces.
He's so cruel..my brother come and ask me what happened and i tell him i have leukemia and i only have several days to live..he walked towards me and hug me tightly while trying to be strong and he asked me if i want to go on chemotherapy. He let go of me and i look up and smile "i don't want to brother chemotherapy is hurt. I can't I'm afraid and I've decided to give up on my life i was scared. He turn around and slam the door and i follow him i call him he didn't turn around i shouted while crying "brother I'm afraid of dying I'm afraid to left you alone i was scared please don't be angry please forgive me...i was afraid to go like this alone.. brother... brother!!!! I collapse on the ground he turn around and help me get up and hug me tightly on his arm he cried on my shoulder while saying sorry...sorry.. don't leave me...
Two days later me and my brother make the best memories he already give in and didn't stop me for not taking chemotherapy. I will go on the other country i ask my butler to give a letter on my best friend as a farewell. I wish he could have a happy life. Even if I'm not there for him..
A day after tomorrow my butler call me and said that he already gave the letter and said my best friend read it loudly...
Letter: " i will be gone forever in your life so take of yourself when i wasn't there to help you and support you actually i just go on the other country so don't miss me that much... don't ever find me or i will hate you don't ever blame yourself on whatever you'll found out..wish you all the happiness in life and good health.
Farewell my dear friend....
"What happened?" He asked the butler my butler didn't say anything but in the end he tell everything out of pity.. " miss had a leukemia he had find out when you asked her to prepare on you and girlfriend anniversary.
Miss was always love you for a long time maybe 6 or 5 years already she was just hiding it. He supported you even in the end she will end up getting hurt...when you came on the mansion just to scold her you don't know that miss was suffering but you just came there just because she forgot the other surprise? She forgot because she was thinking about her life and death while you thinking about your good life! Your so cruel..
When you leave on that morning her brother found out that she had leukemia do you know what she said? She said she doesn't want to get chemotherapy because she's afraid she decided to give up on her life
Her brother can't take it and left but he followed her brother and shouted while she was crying in pain..i was shocked when she said that she's afraid of dying. She was scared and doesn't want to leave her brother alone but she already made up her mind...so please don't look for miss...
My butler said that he collapsed on the ground while holding the Letter and saying sorry he asked my butler where am i...my butler didn't say anything.. my time has come i asked my brother to tell my best friend that i was gone in this world i tell him to take a good care of himself... Goodbye..
He called my friend and said that i was gone and won't ever comeback...
Several days he come to the his best friend's grave. He's leaning while telling everything that happened everyday on his life and he cried while saying "i know I'm cruel on what i did to you and for hurting you but you know your the cruelest one you didn't even share your suffering and you didn't even say goodbye face to face i miss you so much...i really do..if I could forget the pain and everything for now,Would it be easier to stop my tears from falling down?I’d rather you just make me bleed Tear me apart, break me down.I could shout, I could scream struggle until I no longer breathe. Why are you ao heartless...my friend why!!!
Farewell i hope we'll meet in another life and i promised i will be your man. I will find you..
I promise!!
