Chapter 1: ‘The Joker’

“Ariel? …. Ariel?!”

I can hear someone calling my name. It’s as if someone is softly whispering in my ear, desiring an answer in return. This voice is so familiar, it’s such a shame I was actually having an amazing dream.

The voice spoke,

“Ariel…! You need to get up now!”

I opened my eyes with an immediate reaction to shut them as tightly and quickly as I could. The sun seemed to impede my sweet dreams, beckoning me to get up with such a notion that I should listen. I tried to open my eyes again, I noticed a woman sitting on the edge of my bed. She has long golden, beautiful hair that was as fine as silk. My mother has come upstairs to drag me out of my warm space and beckon me to rise out of bed and be productive.

I thought to myself,

“I think not, this will not happen!”

I immediately grabbed the edge of my covers and proceeded to roll over thinking I could succeed in such a task. But little did I know, my mother was far smarter than I could ever be.

Another voice echoes,

“Mom! Is Ariel not waking up again?”

I thought to myself,

“Isn’t this supposed to be my room? Why is my brother Jeramiah in my room?”

I asked my mother a question,

“Mother, what is so important for me to wake up?”

I could hear a low grumble coming for her, and at this moment I knew I had to wake my *** up or I was definitely going to regret it.

I could hear her voice go up and octave,

“Ariel Lynn Thompson! How dare you question your mother! Did you forget? We have to pack and get ready; we are leaving tonight to go to your grandmother’s house. GET UP RIGHT NOW!”

I definitely was not prepared for what had happened next. She quickly grabbed the covers before I could grab ahold. However, my father magically appeared as if he was a ninja from the night. He extends his hands out and lifts me rapidly into the air, it was as if time had slowed down. I could feel my hair, floating in the air, as a soft feather falls to meet the ground. It was at that moment; the sun obstructed my vision as if my eyes could not adjust quick enough. I didn’t have much time to look around the room, but I do remember the smell of sweets and coffee in the air. I lowered my head onto my father’s shoulder and buried my face in the nape of his neck. I could smell his shampoo, it remined me of freshly picked mint leaves mixed with brewed coffee. The smell of coffee was coming from my father. I did not understand since I was so young, but I clung to him like a newborn child clings to their parent. And I could feel overwhelmed with emotion, tears started to fall from my small cheeks as I wrapped my arms around my father and gripped the back of his shirt. Refusing to let go I let out a small cry, continuously sobbing saying,

“Daddy I love you.”

To my surprise, my father did not get mad, instead, he wrapped his arms around my small body as he tried to console me.

He softly spoke,

“Little Ariel, what is wrong?” “Did you not sleep through the night again?” “Do not worry my little Ariel, daddy loves you to the moon and back.” “What is wrong my child?”

These words should have sent comfort to calm my small heart but for some reason I did not understand the card I was about to be dealt.

I lifted my head, my eyes level to see his green eyes that sparkled like an emerald and his hair as black as the midnight sky that softly rested at the nape of his neck and his bangs were long in the front.

I could not help, but reach my hand out and push his bangs aside and spoke faintly,

“Daddy I love you so much, but I do not want to get up. I have a really bad feeling about today and something is telling me that we should stay home.”

My father’s eyes were stern and true, I have never seen a look on his face like this one before. He adverted his eyes to my mother and slightly nodded in her direction and spoke to her,

“My love we need to go, we do not have much time.” “They will be here soon.”

Out of curiosity I could not help but ask,

“Daddy, who’s coming?” “Are we having a visitor come to the house before we go to grandmas?”

My father, God rest his soul, was such an outspoken individual who was kind and true. It was not a question of the matter “If” he loved my mother, this was more so factual with such representation of their love was in fact portrayed to the world. Unfortunately, his image is forever burned in my memory as a broken record that would never continue. Maybe, that is my life? A broken record, that will never produce sweet sounds that could stimulate the soul, mind, and body. Yet, I cannot help but feel as if this memory was the missing piece to my puzzle, a question that hadn’t been answered to my parents’ death. I think back to my father, and I remembered his troubled face, as he gazed upon my mother’s face that seemed to be stricken with fear. His emerald gaze fixated, responding with a shallow smile to the curious Ariel,

“No, my dear, this matter has to be dismissed since your grandmother is waiting, we need to leave now.” No more questions my child, help your mother pack, we must go.”

My Father lowered my small body to the ground, I remember the impact of the cold floor hastening through my feet causing a small chill through my body as I looked up, watching him walk out of my room. My Mother glances around the room, a small whisper escapes her lips,

“Our home, will always be home.” “But now we must go, it is the joker that has become the devil’s advocate.”

Low and behold I noticed a tear escaping the corner of my mothers’ eyes. It was as if pain and fear had stricken her heart, however she could not cry because she was a mother. I remember her sweet, painful gaze adverting in my direction words that probably should not have escaped her red lips,

“My sweet Ariel, the joker is upon us, and we must go.” “Pack your bags, like your father told you and do not argue with your brother.” “Unfortunately, my little Ariel…. These are the cards the joker has dealt.”

Confused by her words I could not help but agree by softly nodding my head, I turned my back toward the door, I could hear her soft footsteps down the hall, fading into the silence.

“I do not understand!” “My parents seemed to have light hardily grazed over the entire issue” I said to my self.

I quietly packed my bags, it was faint but I could hear foot steps shuffling from downstairs, it sounded like it was coming from the kitchen. If I had known then that I will not be coming back to my childhood home I would’ve packed everything that I held near and dear. As small as I was, I attempted to lift my bags and stacked them at the front of my room. I looked back and noticed my room seemed quite empty and I felt an overwhelming emotion of sadness. I did not understand why but it felt as if my heart was hurting and at this moment little did I know that this was goodbye. I left both of my hands and smacked my cheeks filling an overwhelming sense of accomplishment and I yelled at the top of my lungs,

“Mother…Father, I’m ready!”

My Mother responded, “Go get your brother, the driver is here.” “It’s time to go.”

I yelled, “Yes Mother.”

I ran out of my room still in my night gown in bare feet, down the hall in which seemed empty. How had I not noticed the picture frames that once showed my families happiness were missing from the walls? How had I not notice the entire upstairs draped in white sheets that covered the furniture? How could I? I was but a small child who only thought of an adventure to visit my grandmother. I could hear my mother yelling,

“Ariel!” “Stop running upstairs!” The entire house can hear your pitter patter from downstairs!”

I stopped in my tracks and thought to myself, “How is it that mother’s can hear everything?”

I quickly responded, “Yes Mother!”

Of course I could not help but feel excitement dwelling inside my small body as I continued to run towards my brothers room! His room was just down the hall on the right side of the house upstairs. I never understand why my brother had gotten the bigger room? I mean, I’m a growing girl! I need more space for my dolls but unfortunately my parents did not agree with my idealistic thinking. The door to his room seemed like a portal to another room. I glanced down and noticed light seeping through the crack at the bottom of the door. I could hear my brothers voice, it was faint but I could hear him speaking out loud!

“My summers Eve, the one I hold dear.” “I shall not see you again, at age 12 you stole my affection, I hope this letter finds you well!” My family and I are traveling to Brookfield, Connecticut.” “I fear that this might be the last time I will see you and our fate must be severed.”

“Is my brother writing a letter to a girl!” I thought to myself.

Green with curiosity I could not help but lift my night gown so I could peak through the crack on the floor! I had to know who this summers eve was! He seemed so dramatic in his thinking! Does he not realize that we will only be there for the summer? I could feel myself smile with anticipation, as I giggled to myself. Leaning in, I put my ear closer to the crack on the floor to listen further to what I thought was extraordinary news that I could gossip about! My brother continued,

“My sweet summers eve, I must pray tell my affection towards you is true!” “Even though we are young, at the age of twelve I knew it must be true when I accidentally saw you at the edge of the woods picking flowers.” Your hair was as golden as the sun and you skin is as fair as the first snow fall.” “When your gaze set upon mine, it was your Safire eyes that sparked envy within my heart.” “At this moment, I knew it to be true!” “I love you, my sweet summers eve.” “I must inquire about your affection, do you feel the same as I?” “If so, I will send another you a letter as soon as my family is in Brookfield!” “Please understand my summers eve, this is not goodbye, for when I am of age I will come seek your affection once more.”

I could not help but to giggle uncontrollably to myself. I raised my hand to cover my mouth so I could stay quiet while thinking to myself, “Who is this… summers eve?” As amusing as this juicy gossip was, his room fell silent and I heard my brother say aloud, “Dammit Ariel!”

It happened so fast, I heard his footsteps pace toward his door, my heart started to beat profusely! Hastening with speed, I put both of the palms of my hands to the floor and lifted my small torso so I could quickly stand and run away. As fate would have it, I ended up tripping on my night gown to fall face first into the ground. The impact of the fall caused the quickening of pain from my forehead to my entire body. I could feel my tears start to swell up as I lifted my head to see my brothers door was now wide open.

I thought to myself, “He is standing over me, maybe I can pretend to not hear a thing?” “I could say mother told me to come get you and then I fell to the floor by tripping over my night gown?” “Yes!” “This could work!” I thought to myself!

Mischievously cackling to myself about my devious plan to get out of this situation, I looked up and saw the twisted expression on my brothers face. His entire face looked like a red juicy plum that was ripe to pick! I could not help myself, the corners of my lips formed into a glorious smile as I spoke sweetly to my brother, “Who is summers eve?” I mockingly giggled at my brother.

At this moment I knew I had screwed up. His entire face turned as red as an apple, and his expression became twisted with embarrassment! I most definitely, hit the juiciest jack pot of the century!

“God Dammit Ariel!” “You are so dead! I can’t believe you heard everything!” My brother yelled at the top of his lungs.

I could feel my smile turn into a mocking shit eating grin, the corners of my mouth had bared my teeth.

I quickly stood up but gravity had other plans in mind unfortunately. As soon as my face made contact with the ground I could hear my brothers laughter fill the room. At this moment I knew, I had been caught but the worst was yet to come. This small memory of my brother and I will forever be engraved in my heart as a memory that echos in the distance.

“Ariel?” “Jade?” “Are you finished packing?”

I could hear my mother’s words, but at that moment it didn’t seem that important as to whom this summers eve had been. Yet again, curiosity seems to overwhelm my judgment. Even though I was the one on the floor making a fool out of myself. With such pride and the feeling of wanting to torment my older brother, I simply smiled at him and said,

“So older brother… who is this… Summers Eve?”

I could see the frustration on his face, which seemed to make me want to antagonize him even more.

“Mind your own Buisness Ariel”! My brother said in a low tone.

I could not help but reply with,

“You’re the one who was screaming at the top of your lungs, proclaiming your love… for this Summers Eve girl.” I said with a mocking grin.

Even though, I had forgotten that I was the one on the floor looking like a fool. However, none of this seemed to matter at the time. I was a playful, innocent child. Without a care in the world and of course I could not help but disregard my older brother’s feelings towards this, “Summers Eve”. I also wasn’t sure about my brothers affection, it seems as if he had hatred towards me even back then. As if the very sight of me had been a stain upon his heart and his life. None of this really mattered, or so I thought. It was the fact that I couldn’t understand my own heart back then. Even to this day, my own heart seems to direct me down the wrong path from time to time.

“Ariel!” “Jade!” “Get down here this instant! The car is here and it’s time to go!” I could feel my mother’s tone starting to escalate like a volcano that was about to erupt.

A devilish smile appeared on my face, as my hand made contact with the floor I could feel a cold sensation from the baseboard that seemed to run up from the palm of my hand making its way past my shoulders. I slowly lifted my small, frail body so my feet stand could stand firm on the ground. While, a thought had crossed my mind, but I sure as hell did not recognize… this unsettling feeling.

“The house seemed dreary, and had an unnerving cold sensation to it.” I thought to myself.

I’m not sure but it was as of my childhood home knew we were leaving and my family was not coming back. I could feel an overwhelming sadness that had dwelled within my heart. I guess, tormenting my older brother was a way of coping with the issue at hand.

With my devilish smile, I looked at my brother whose face bearer and emotion of hatred and irritation. His eyes that were deep blue turned into ice blue. He had a smirk on his face; he spoke,

“Get ready Ariel it’s time to go.”

I watched my brother turn his back to me. As he started walking towards his room, that was only a couple feet away from where I stood he paused with his hand on his door knob and spoke softly,

“Ariel, there are some things that you do not understand.”

“Think to yourself… why are we leaving when it’s only a couple of days until Christmas?”

“Why is everything in the house covered with sheets?” “Why does mom and dad have a worried look upon their face?”

Jade turned his head slightly to the right and opened his door slightly. I could see the light shining upon his face, showing his ice blue eyes that seemed to look into the depths of your would even when you didn’t want your secrets to be shown. The corner of his mouth formed a sympathetic smile, it was as if he knew something that I did not know. Of course my older brother was right, I didn’t know what was going on. I mean after all, I thought it was a visit to grandmas house, but I apparently was wrong. However, being the 8 year old… carefree child that I was, I did not know what was in store for my family and I within the next couple of hours. If I had known, I would have stopped us from leaving. I would have spoken up and said, “Please; Mom… Dad, let’s not go! Let’s stay!”

But of course I had already spoken up this morning and my parents had shrugged it off. They didn’t believe me, I mean, who could blame them? They seemed preoccupied with a secret that I hadn’t a clue about. Yet, my brother Jade, acted as if he knew what was going on.

The 8 year old Ariel could only respond to her older brother with,

“What are you talking about Jade?” “You act as if we aren’t coming back home, I know your sad since we are leaving for Christmas break!” “But you will see this girl again!” “I promise!” “I’m sorry for being so mean, can you please forgive me brother?” “I love you”.

His sympathetic smile turned into a frown, I could see the worry in his eyes. Almost like he was trying to fight the tears back ever so desperately. I could tell this his tears were wanting to pour down like the summer showers that fall, but leave you feeling empty. Considering the summers rain never stayed. The time that it had rained was always to short to say goodbye. That was my brothers emotion, that had so much agony. I could see it in his eyes, the summers rain that had left and never said goodbye.

My brother softly spoke again,

“Ariel, go downstairs.” And with that, he turned his head back around and proceeded to walk in his room. Softly shutting the door behind him, where the light had seemed to follow leaving the hallway dark. Dancing shadows on the walls faded with the darkness leaving a cold wrenching chill in the air.

I turned around and in the distance I saw a tall shadow wearing a hat upon its head. The shadow was a figure of a man whose hat seemed to almost touch the ceiling. I mustered up all of my courage and decided to step forward but as my foot made contact with the ground, so did the shadow. I decided to move my right foot, but yet again the shadow's right and left foot seemed to be a mirror that mimicked my every movement. I shut my eyes tightly, breathing in and out so I could calm myself. I said over and over in my head,

“Ariel, there is no such thing as monsters!” “Calm your heart and move down the stairs, your mother and father are waiting for you.” “It’s time to go!”

I opened my eyes, by this time I was at the edge of the stairs that lead to the front room downstairs. Of course to my surprise, it was just a strange middle aged gentleman who wore a funny hat with a red feather on the side. He looked up at me and smiled politely, his words escaped his lips,

“Hello, do not be alarmed I am only here at your parents request.” “I am here to get your belongs and load them into the car.” “I believe your parents are waiting outside and the car is ready for you and your brother”.

I could feel an overwhelming feeling of relief… the scary monster was just a man who worked for my parents.

A grand smiled formed at the corner of my lips as I replied,

“Oh… I see.” “Well I better get going then.”

I felt like a princess whose carriage was waiting to take her to a far away land. Almost as of an adventure had awaited, and it was calling my name. Beckoning me to come down the stairs so I could start my life story. With both feet I hopped down one step, allowing a giggle to escape my lips. As I proceeded to pretend to be a bunny that was being chased by a wretched monster. I came to the last step and decided to bend my legs and make a leap of faith as my feet landed on the ground, I looked up and to my dismay there was my mother. She had a scowl on her face that seemed to reach the depths of the floors. At that moment I knew I was in trouble!

“Ariel!” “How many times have I told you not to hop down the stairs like a rabid animal!” She said in a stern voice.

I smiled politely and raised my small hand so I could sarcastically count using my fingers. Then I looked up and my polite smile turned into a grin as I responded,

“To many times to count mother!” I giggled.

My mother’s reaction seemed displeased with my answer and she gave me such a look that even the devil would be terrified of my own mother at that very moment!

“Ariel, just get in the car!” My mother said.

She had the palm of her hand touching her head, she whispered,

“This child… is going to give me Grey hair.” “Lord help my daughter become a lady.” “I feel as if I have spoiled her.”

My mother let out a small sigh. She grabbed my hand to lead me outside to the car. But as we both walked out the door I looked to my left and another man with a funny hat passed right by me. He to had a smile on his face. He tipped his hat to my mother and I and said,

“Ms. Thompson.”

My mother responded with a slight nod and proceeded to walk towards the car. The door to the vehicle was open. It was our family car, a 1960s black Lincoln. I could see my father in the back seat, he was dressed in a suit. I always knew my father was handsome, of course I had gotten my looks from my mother.

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