CHAPTER 3

One thing that was acceptable throughout our conversation and which actually kept a check on my temper was his honesty. Even though he knew, where he was and who was he talking to. He didn’t change throughout of it. Like maybe he would have sounded kind of intimated or violence, but he was polite yet impatient all the time. But on the other hand, it was hard to be calm and collected, though I was trying to be one. Deep inside I was wishing that he was lying or it was a nightmare and I’ll wake up forgetting all of this. But this wasn’t the case at all. He was there telling truth. The only thing that i could do was to admit it and think of my next move.

“So what happened next?” I asked

“We met each other after that quite often. She accepted my advances too. So I thought everything was going pretty well for us. But-”

“ But... But what?”

“ I always kind of felt that she was there but she wasn’t. Like she could leave me any minute. Even though we were together, it always felt like something was missing. She was in her own world and had her walls up which I could never cross.”

Listening to him talking felt like it was me he was talking about because I could relate to everything he said and was feeling like that for a while. I ignored this feeling, calling it “over-thinking” but i guess i was right about my fear. The fear that was in me for so long, that hunted me for so long was true after all. And now i can’t ignore it anymore.

I was scared of this feeling. Admitting it that I was not good enough for her or she was always far away from my reach was so hard but a bitter truth. I listened him talking silently because I was ashamed that a boy younger than me acknowledged his feelings so bravely and honestly while I couldn’t even to myself.

“Then did you stalked her?”

Kind of freaked out, “ NO!! No... I didn’t. One day i accidently read her pop up messages and that was from you. That day my fear turned into reality and then I looked for you because i wanted to confront you. But seeing you, I guess you didn’t know about this until now”

“ Well, yeah. You could say that. I had my own fears though, just never admitted.”

“That must be hard, isn’t?”

Smiling bitterly, “Better than admitting it”.

After that, there was an awkward silence. A strange kind of relief feeling overwhelmed me after admitting my inside feelings and kind felt my shoulders light too.

Trying to break the silence,I asked “ Do you love her?”

After a pause, “ I don’t know but she was the first one I liked. It pains my hurt to just to think about it. What about you?”

“ Well, I wouldn’t say that I am perfectly fine even after hearing all of this. Though it seems like this, I still had my happiest days in last one year. After all, we were thinking of marriage....”

“ So you guys were together for a whole year!?”

“ Well yeah. And you can call me a fool for not realizing it until now.”

“ So, what are you going to do?”

“We can’t just do everything by ourselves, can we? We have to talk this through.You should do it too.”

“So shall we do it tog-”

“No!! Even though its like this. We still gotta do this properly.Gotta be a man. Well, I know this is kinda sudden but what is your name?”

“Oh, My name is Eli, Ash.”

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