Chapter 3

Rachel



“Rachel, do you think daddy loves Jane,” Marline asks, scanning pictures of Brandon and Jane and placing them beside each other.

“You know you’re smarter than any kid your age,” I said, sitting beside her as Marline smiled at my words. “And yeah, I think your daddy loves Jane, and you know a secret..,”

“What secret..,” Marlin said, suddenly excited by my words.

“Well, I don’t know for sure… but I think Jane loves Brandon too, in one way or another.”

“Really, Marlin jumped in excitement at my words.

“Hey, but don’t say that to your daddy or Jane, it's our little secret.”

“What secret…...”

We both turned our faces to see Jane standing in the doorway, with five month old Liam, and loading shopping bags in her arms.

“Jane,” I quickly took long steps to the doorway, helping Jane with bags of groceries. “How many times do I have to tell you, call me, when you need? '' I scolded Jane, only to make her smile and baby Liam giggle.

“So cute,” I said, watching Liam yawing in his mother's arms. “Watching you makes me wanna have a baby, but then I change my mind, seeing all the hard work you and Brandon have to put into raising these two devils.”

“I hate you, Rachel,” Marlin said, from behind me, crossing her arms around her chest.

“No you don’t,” I said, tickling her, making her laugh. “See you love me,”

“Can I play with Liam,” Marline asked after a while, as Jane relaxed her frame on the couch with Marlin sitting beside her, watching her. “Sure baby, but Liam, as you can see, Liam is asleep now,” Marline looked upset at Jane's words but then smiled. “Then can you tell me a story,” Jane nodded.

I sat on the couch watching the three of them snuggling on the couch having a warm, cozy family time with each other. It's comforting to see how, even without being connected to each other with blood, they find comfort and love in each other's company.

I sometimes find myself an outsider watching them interact, but I’m happy to find such good people to work for, but I can’t lie that I miss my past life, my old place, people from my past, mostly Jayce. It's been a year, but yet I couldn’t forgo my feelings for him. I just hope that he is happy and maybe moves on with his life, and maybe get married and have kids that are as sweet as Marline and Liam. Even if he is not with me, I wish him all happiness in life and in the future. I wish that I could say the same for myself.

“Hey guys,” I turned my head watching Brandon inside, washing his hands, before sitting beside Jane, “How is my big boy,” Brandon smiled, cuddling Liam in his arms.

God, they look so cute with Jane snuggling with Marline and Brandon with Liam and with them playing and snuggling with each other's kids. This image is so cute that I’m so jealous.

I picked up my phone and clicked a few pictures, not letting this perfect moment go uncaptured, “So cute..,” my words got louder than I accepted and both Jane and Brandon turned their heads at me, “Rachel,”

I smiled, trying to act innocent, “What… don’t worry, I’ll send you both a copy, for now bye..,” I said, grabbing my bag and running.

“Rachel,” I smiled, hearing them shouting my name again and laughing later together. They deserve all the happiness in life.

Small and simple moments and time with family are something that I would die for, but I don’t think I deserve any of them. For now, I have to go to work or I’m going to be late.

 *******

Jayce

“So what do you think about the new recipe,” One of my chef questions, distracting my thoughts.

“It's bland, no flavor,” I slid the plate away from me. “But, this time I tried my best..,”

“Yeah, like last time and the time before that,” I stood by my table, wanting to get far away from the person that doesn’t even know how to cook a simple dish.

“But…,” He complained.

“You know what you’re fired for, just pack and leave.”

“What…but…,” He continued as I left the room without caring about his complaints. If a person doesn't know how to cook this simple dish, I don’t know how he’ll manage to cook dishes that are far more complicated and precise than this.

God, I need some fresh air and maybe liquor.

At times like this, I miss Rachel even more than I wanted to. She was the best, and even without any professional experience and background in food. The flavor profile of her dishes, the aroma, the way she presented each and every creation of hers with so much attention and detail. I miss her cooking more than I want to accept it.

Even with years of work and learning, I can’t compare with Rachel.

It's almost been a year and yet I couldn’t find a clue about where she is, and what makes my search harder is Rachel being a loner and secretive person, in many ways she is like me.

Except for the fact that she is loud and quirky, which is quite the opposite of what I’m, but staying away from her made me realize one thing that I haven’t realized working with her for years. That her smile and attitude is just a mask that she puts on to hide the true feeling in her heart. Her smile is nothing but a shield that she uses to protect herself from suffering, but that day, with alcohol in her system, she was finally able to show the pain, the thoughts, the feelings she had been hiding for years, and that was the last day she did that, because after that night she disappears like mist in air leaving no clue behind whatsoever.

I sighed, shaking my head, forgoing thoughts of Rachel. I don’t want to think of her not now. It's been a year and I’m trying my best to find her and ways to contact her. But I’m angry too, anger not only because she left me alone while I was asleep, but not for once did she think of contacting me, or clearing any misunderstanding, before she ended anything between us.

I know that we were not lovers, not boyfriend or girlfriend, but we still were something, at least for the sake of our work relationship. She could talk to me for once, before ending everything and leaving with so many unanswered questions behind.

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