Dream

I dream to have a man who will walk me into the aisle. A man who can gave me love and a complete family nor a happy ending. But no matter how much hardwork I put it nor use it, it ended into something different story.

Hi, my name is Haru. I am 24 years old. When I was a young, my parents always asked me, what kind of man whom I will choose or be proud of to meet my parents. I always told my parents , that I want my man who will like my father. A father whom I know that is committed, faithful and loyal to my mother and our family. But all my dream nor the things I saw is a fake. My father cheated on my mother. My mother died because she endure so much pain that causes by my father. My father left me and my mom and lived with his mistress. His mistress take over my mother role after her death. I never saw my father tears for my mother but I witness how my father kneel down and beg to my step mom not to leave him. He promise my stepmom to give him a life she always dream't of .

After my mother burial, I run as much as I can. I scream like as much as I can. If I've known my father betrayal, might be I can save the life of my mother. If I was known that she suffer from those man lies maybe I was there and give her a shoulder to lean on.

Everytime I came home, my mother always give me smile and warm of her love. She always open her arms and always reminds me to love my father no matter what happen. I asked her why, but she gave me an assurance it wasnt my father mistake. She always asked for my forgiveness but I always said, mom no matter what will happen or who will destory our family, I will protect it , I promise. But my promises to my mom is all shattered. I didnt protect her from the cruelty of life. I wasn't there to hear all her complain. I was busy roaming around or visiting other places. I forgot that I have someone who is waiting for me to see if I am okay.

Because of my father betrayal, I never believe any man's lie. I end up alone, no friends or parents who guide me. I continually asked for answers to my question on how the things ended not what we plan of. I even question God, what did I do wrong? God why I needed to suffer like this? Did I make mistake, if I do please allow me to see to protect them. Please let me remind myself, that this is only a nightmare, and I have to wake up from this bad dream.

But Hell No! It is what the reality of my life. My mom is gone. I have no one left behind. I want to follow where my mom now but why? Please allow me to see my mom for the last time. Please take me to her. Please tell her I am very sorry. I never noticed her tears nor her pain.

I always wish to dream my mom so that I can asked her forgiveness. Oh God, please allow me to see my mom for the last time. Please tell her to come in my dreams because I dont know where to start and how to start anymore. I am begging you, my mom is the precious things that I have that I forgotten to look after. I am sorry, please give her back to me. I am willing to do anything just bring her back. Please oh God.

My life will be now nothing anymore like before.

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