Chapter-1

4 YEARS LATER

"Happy birthday Ellie!"

A drop of tear rolled down my eye as I clung into the remaining shreds of my departing nightmare. The always smiley face is now filled with horror as they call my name for help but I was stuck. An invisible force forcing me to stop in my place as I watch them disappear into fog.

Suddenly I was in a strange room.The constant beeping of the monitor, people rushing around, screaming and crying rang in my ear. And I closed my ears with my hands to stop those sound. They wouldn't stop.

"Come on darling, wake up. You don't wanna be late on your first day back at school."

The voice was faraway, a familiar and soft voice that I tried to reach out but it was too loud around me. Bringing my hands to my throat I gasped for air as I chocked on my own cries. All i wanted was to stop those sounds.

"M-make it stop please."

A chocking gasp forced me to bolt up into an upright position and it took me a moment before realizing that I was in my room, the curtains by my windows were open, letting a stroke of sunlight pouring into my room, making it brighter. Immense relief flooded through me and I ran my hands on my forehead. Drops of sweats were lining my forehead and tears drying under my eyes.

"Ellie?"

My mom strode to my side and sitting by the edge of the bed. She carefully placed a hand on my arm, her brown orbs watching me cautiously.

"Mom?"

"Are you okay?" She asked me, her voice laced with concern and worry as she searched my face.

"Was it the same nightmare?"

There was no point of denying the obvious. So I nodded slowly, adverting my gaze to look at anywhere but her, hoping she wouldn't interrogate me any further.

"How many times I've told you to see Dr. Kimberly, but you being stubborn won't listen to me. She told you to come back if the dreams come back again."

I wiped my hairs that were sticking to my face. I tucked them behind my ears and I imagined myself sitting in a room and being tempted to recollect my recurring nightmares.

I shook my head at my her.

"Mom, I don't want any therapy, that will be waste of our times. Besides, it's the first one I'm having in almost a month. You're worrying for nothing."

Don't get me wrong, Dr. Kimberly was kind and nice but the thing was she was too good at her job. She knew exactly what button to push to get me on edge and she was way too observant to my liking.

By far she did managed to ease my dreams for a short time but I didn't like the way she made me talk about my dreams. So when the guilt worsened, the nightmare followed suit. And I couldn't bring myself to get help from her. The dreams were the only thing that made me feel less guilty. So I just couldn't.

A sigh left her lips, clearly getting my lie.

"Wanna talk about it? Was it bad?"

I shrugged. "The usual one."

She did not look convinced and I didn't want to have that conversation. I just woke up.

"Mom, don't look at me like that. I'm fine. I always am." I muttered a tired smile, hoping she'd drop the subject.

She pulled me into a hug and I instantly melted into her arms.

"You should take it easy today." She let go of me and kissed my forehead.

"it's your birthday and I'm gonna bake you a nice lil cake when you come back home okay? Or you can take the day off if you want. "

I exhaled slowly to ease the knot tightening inside my chest. Birthdays were supposed to be celebratory but mine was filled with grief. And it's always gonna be the same. So out of all days, today i just needed to be alone and school would be the perfect distraction for me.

"I'll pass. You know with it being the first day of my senior year and all that stuff. "

I tried to sound excited for school but I was far from it. All i wanted was to get the degree as soon as possible and get the hell out of that school.

She scanned my face for the last time, the concern in her eyes softening a lil bit and she nodded in understanding.

"Okay, get ready and come downstairs. I'll make your favorite breakfast. "

***

After my mother left my room, I dragged myself to the bathroom and took a long cold shower. The water did help to release the tension on my shoulder.

After showering I threw on a pair of jeans and a plaid shirt over a tank top and pulled my hair into a ponytail. Today didn't seem worth the effort to dress up even if it was my birthday.

Grabbing my bag pack I headed downstairs and made my way to the kitchen where I could hear faint voices of my parents. My mom was making pancakes where as my dad was in his work attire, sitting on the stool by the kitchen island, eating breakfast.

Dropping my bag on the floor I took a seat next to my dad and my dad's attention was on me.

"Morning kiddo and happy birthday. "

He smiled at me and kissed the side of my head. His smile was bright, but it didn't conceal the sorrow in his eyes. Everyone was in grief for what happened 4 years back on this day.

"Good morning and Thank you. "

Mom placed a plate full of pancakes in front of me and I pour some maple syrup over it. Hm..smelled delicious.

"So your mom and I decided to take you out to dinner tonight and then we can go to that ice cream store you love and then- "

He probably saw the look on my face because he stopped talking for a second to begin again.

"-unless you have plans with your friends. "

I shook my head.

"No I don't. And you don't have to do this. I dont want this to be a big deal"

He frowned.

"Of course it is. I know how much you loved going out on your birthday. "

Yes that's right. 'Loved' in past. But not anymore. But I didn't want to be rude.

My mom placed a glass of water beside my plate and crossed her arms, leaning against the counter.

"Your dad's right. It's been so long since we all went out for dinner so it's gonna be a lil family time. "

I placed my fork on the plate. "Really guys it's okay. Besides its school day so I'm probably gonna be tired, So can we stay in? I promise I'll wear the birthday cap and blow the candles. "

They looked at each other before my dad sighed.

"If that's what you want. "

I gave him a reassuring smile.

This is gonna be a long day.

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