Chapter 4

"My passion for writing will land me six feet under someday. 'Why am i like this? why can't i be more like sister flora or brother Nicolas' Maybe, then father will accept me as his own. i will fight till the end ..HE WILL HAVE TO ACCEPT MEBECAUSE I AM HIS DAUGHTER EVEN AFTER THE ODDS''

''Will my life be always like this? father killed my mother infront of me because he said she was a lowly creature .That was the only time i ever saw father. Mother  used to say that i look like my father .In my memory, she was only loving and kind.''THEN WHY DID FATHER KILL HER??'' 'Was she really that bad?''

I really don't know anymore..Who am i ? I am sick and tired of being locked up in this place. Father never meets me ..Today is my 18 th birthday ..no one wished me ..once again ..Would things have been different if i was not a jenkin or i was not ILLEGIMATE?

''I HATE ALL OF THEM ..EVER SINGLE ONE OF THEM ..ALL OF THEM ARE MONSTERS'' THE JENKIN DUCHY IS FILLED WITH MONSTERS . MY MOTHER WAS NOT THE LOWLY CREATURE . BUT MY FATHER SURELY IS !

''It hurts! brother nicolas came to the palace today ..he looked just like father .when he will grow up he surely will be like my father.Brother said he wanted to play but then why did he hurt me with a stick ? HE CALLED ME A LOWLY CREATURE LIKE MY MOTHER ..IT IS BURNING ..I WISH SOMEONE ..ANYONE ..EVEN IF IT'S THE DEVIL ..PLEASE HELP ME ..I DON'T WANNA LIVE ANYMORE

''Something happened today ..it was usual like everday ..nicolas hit me with a steel stick ..but.. something came out of my hand ..like the golden sun rays and it healed me ' i felt all the pain and weakness in me was gone

I stood there in utter silence while reading the torn pages Ilaria left behind. ''SO, you were hurt ..but look at you ..you are so strong for surviving up to this long.'' i said with tears in my eyes. We never really realize life from the other's situation unless we feel it ourselves.

now , i am the owner of this body ..i must do everything so that i will not repeat my life of misery again .and i will get the peace Ilaria deserved.

The moon shone brightly that day ..the nature sighed knowing how many lost souls must they witness leaving a whistful melancholy among the rustling sounds of the leaves.

Illaria looked out the window .Looking at the moon '' i never really noticed you , did i ?'' ''well , maybe this is why god gave me a second chance to relive your beauty''

The moon knew this child was not something to be disregarded of .And oneday she will have enough to conquer the world if she wants.

The sun rays fell upon ilaria's beautifully sculpted face.''Which was the last time i slept so peacefully having no burden on my shoulders?' A maid knocked at the door ''miss , please wake up , it's time for your breakfast'' ''sure , come in'' I shouted feeling the utmost hunger in me.The smell of freshly baked bread and rotisserie chicken soup filled the room''good morning , my beautiful miss..please breakfast ready ..make sure to eat alot'' ''Well , atleast the servants were really nice ..I don't remember being this loved even from my own mother '' ''hmm , i will eat  a lot and be more healthy'' '' sophine , If you don't mind , can you go on a walk with me in the garden?'' Sophine looked suprised at my words.Was i not supposed to say that? Then again sophine rushed downstairs without telling me anything leaving me dumbfounded. ''madam! , madam ! PLEASE YOU NEED TO COME AT FIRST''

After a while all the servants including the head mistress and butler arrived in my room ''Our young miss is getting better ! We are so happy my dear '' said the head misterss , her eyes being watery .

''young miss wanted to go on a walk ..i will surely go with her ''

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