Chapter 1

Chapter 1

He is enigmatic.

When you look at him, you’d wish you were with him. I’m staring at his photo on his website. His eyes are closed, hands propped against the side. It creates a subtle tension across his chest that makes him look even more relaxed. He has stubble that’s almost like a clean shave. His slightly raised, toned knee looks good on him. And the vein running down his bicep suits him perfectly.

“Hey! What are you looking at?” Andria says from beside me, and I show her my phone. “Oh, wow. He’s a snack. Buck Heman?”

I nod.

The one and only Buck Heman. He works in real estate, is a passionate entrepreneur, and an actor. He knows exactly what to do when the camera focuses on him.

“Is he still your crush until now?”

“Why not? He’s so charming and can easily make my knees tremble just with his gaze.”

“Suit yourself,” she says, walking off to the next cubicle. “If the boss catches you daydreaming like that, you’re in trouble again.”

“It’s not like that…” I quickly tuck my phone into my shoulder bag. “He already knows I’m head over heels for him. He won’t care.”

Andria just rolls her eyes and starts on her tasks.

I huff, zoning out for a moment, then snatch my phone back from my bag and stare at the photo again. I smile. Even when he’s lying in a net hammock, he looks so dashing. His light-olive skin complements his physique. To be honest, I’ve never met him yet. I want to, but I always put it off. Maybe we’re not destined to cross paths just yet.

I bite my lip. How could those wet black shorts make me tremble inside? Why does everything he does make my whole body heat up? This isn’t lust, right? But if it is, how do I make it stop? You can’t. I sigh. I know I can’t.

I finished my afternoon shift and headed back to my condo first. I know I shouldn’t. It’ll cost me. But… my whole body suddenly ached.

“How’s Wan?” I ask my friend Tem, and he flicks his finger at me. “He’s good. How about you?”

“What about me?” he shoots back, taking a bite of the fresh lumpia in the box. I frown at him. “I’m okay, Dan. You’re the one I should be asking about that. How are you? Holding up?”

I exhale and nod.

“Just say the word if you’re not. You can always move into my place…”

“Thank you for the offer, but I’m okay. Lots of bills, but I can still manage.”

“Damn. Why don’t we just get married now?”

“You’re not even ready to court me, let alone talk about marriage.”

He smirks slightly, then stands up slowly and walks over to me. I wrap my arms around his neck as he pecks a kiss on my lips. I slap his shoulder, and he laughs.

“Why don’t you take me now?”

“You sure?”

I nod. He lifts me up right away and carries me to my room.

My finger taps against my desk as I think back to what Tem and I did. He knows I’m just looking for warmth, and he respects that. But I don’t know. Lately, it feels like I can’t keep us in that kind of arrangement anymore.

“Meeting at four.”

I jump when Andria appears, wearing her snake-print blazer. I roll my eyes at her, my mind still stuck on what happened between Tem and me.

“Hey, An.”

“Yeah?”

“Why so ‘yeah’?”

“What is it?”

I clear my throat, then pick up my drink—an iced caramel macchiato—and take a sip before turning to her. Her eyes don’t leave me.

“We fucked.”

“Hmm. Nothing new there.”

“No…” I set the drink down on the table and stand up to put some distance between us. “This time was different.”

“Give me that,” she says, pointing at my drink. I furrow my brow for a second but hand it to her anyway. She takes a sip. “I’m listening.”

“Like I said, we fucked. But I’m feeling something different now, you know?”

“I bet you fell for him.”

“No!”

“Then what?”

I shrug. She hands my drink back to me, and I take it with a confused look.

“Just talk when you’re sober.”

“I am sober. Hey…”

But she’s already walking away, back to her cubicle. I can’t help but clear my throat awkwardly.

At three o’clock, I get ready for the meeting. Manifesting, new milestone. I steel myself, smooth out the mess in my hair, and tie it up in a bun. I glance over at Andria. She’s getting ready too.

Tapping my fingers on the table, I wait patiently for the clock to strike four. One. Two. Three. I almost lose count when a tall, muscular man walks past.

“Psst.”

“Is that…?”

Andria just nods at me. I blink to pull myself back to reality, but I realize I’m already here. Not wanting to get distracted, I turn my eyes back to the clock.

One push of the tail. I clear my throat. And one last push… then four o’clock arrives. Andria and I stand up at the same time. You can do this, Dan.

We head to the boardroom together. I have no idea why he’s here. No one told us.

I push open the glass door and freeze instantly when our eyes meet. I don’t think I can do this. I shake my head secretly. No. You can do this. Just be present, okay? Present. Andria and I stand side by side. Buck is just a few feet away from me.

“Since everyone is here, shall we start?”

We all nod at Boss D.

“Good morning, everyone,” our boss begins, and we listen closely. “Broston Estate is here to present their plans for our facilities and workplace layout. Sir.”

Buck stays still for a moment, like he’s waiting for a cue. But when he stands up, all eyes are on him. He walks with calm confidence and full dominance, until he’s facing us.

“Good morning,” his voice is deep and soft, which is perfect for his thin lips. “I’m Buck Heman, chief executive and manager of Broston Estate. We’re here as a team to discuss the future project that Sandiego Holdings wants to partner on. To begin…”

The whiteboard lights up as the projector centers on it. Buck’s suit hides the sharp curve of his shoulders. A shame he’s fully dressed today, but I can’t deny it looks good on him.

“Croston Pod,” Buck says quietly, glancing at the image beside him. “This sleek pod is built at plinth level with a sturdy partition wall. We know standard partition walls should be 100 millimeters thick, but for this one, we’ve reduced it by 10. So that’s a total of 90 millimeters in thickness…”

I listen to him, even though I have no idea what the hell he’s talking about. But I know what a partition wall is. It’s used to divide a room. Buck says more, but my eyes are fixed on his pink lips.

“For the interior,” he pauses, waiting for the next image to flash on the whiteboard. “We have collaboration spaces to help you discuss ideas with your colleagues, while the tropical vibe from our custom grass wall keeps you relaxed…”

I can barely look away. Every word that comes out of his mouth feels important. When he’s done, Boss D claps, and we all follow suit. Buck smiles faintly and glances at me. Even in corporate attire, I feel like he’s naked in front of me right now.

The meeting ends quickly. I thought I’d get a promotion or a big salary raise, but it was just this. But it’s not so bad. Buck was there. He even looked at me.

“Psst.”

I turn around.

“He’s so hot!”

“Shh… he might hear you. He’s still in there.”

“Oops. Sorry, sorry.”

“He really is hot. He’s a model too, you know.”

Andria walks into my cubicle and sits on my de. Good thing it’s sturdy. I look up at her as she smirks at me. I shake my head and stare off into the distance.

“Ugh… I know that look,” she huffs, and I take a deep breath. “I know you. You just broke up with your ex, remember?”

“I wanted him so bad, though,” I say, biting my lower lip. “I wonder what it would feel like to have him inside me, you know?”

“You’re crazy.”

“It must feel so good.”

Andria shakes her head, smiling.

At home, I’m alone; Tem left already. He said he’d come back tomorrow when he feels the urge to jump me. That guy’s nuts too. I smile. Buck was so dashing earlier. His copper eyes are stunning. I almost wanted to get on my knees and let him do whatever he wanted to me.

When my eyes land on the door, I see two white envelopes on the floor. I walk over, pick them up right away, and open them. I exhale. Bills again. I think for a second, set them aside, and sit on the couch.

I wince, grab my phone from the couch, and search for his website. I find it quickly and stare at his photos again. His website is for personal and business use; he focuses on travel, modeling, and perfume brands.

I scroll up until I find his contact number. I don’t know what comes over me, I tap it, and it takes me to the dial pad. I hesitate, second-guessing myself.

“Wan, come here.”

I set my phone aside. My corgi runs over and jumps onto the couch next to my phone. The world spins when his paw presses the call button.

“No!”

Wan just pants in front of me.

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