MY FEELINGS

HOME IN HIS EYES

IT was 2019 the most beautiful year , he walked into my classroom like a quiet moment the world didn’t pause ,but my heart did. He was only eleven, a new admission, sitting there with eyes so innocent and cute they felt untouched by noise, cruelty, or time. I was twelve and unaware of what love was supposed to feel like, yet something inside me softened the instant I saw him. I remember thinking, how can someone look this pure so innocent? I didn’t know then that hearts recognize things long before minds do.

We became friends the easy way...without effort, without expectations. We talked, laughed, shared homework, and complained about school like all children do. Seventh grade unfolded gently, full of stolen glances and quiet moments that stayed longer than words ever could. His big Black eyes met mine often, and every time they did, I felt something warm and unfamiliar. I thought it was comfort. I thought it was friendship. Only later did I understand, it was my first love, quietly taking shape.

But childhood rarely protects what it creates. Rumours found their way into our innocence, twisting something pure into something painful. Misunderstandings grew, silence followed, and suddenly he wasn’t talking to me anymore. I blamed myself endlessly, wondering if speaking up had ruined everything. Before healing could find us, the world shut down. Lockdown trapped us inside our homes, cutting off every possibility of contact. No messages, no social media, just memories replaying themselves in my head.

Life moved on the way it always does. I changed schools in tenth grade, tried to forget, tried to grow. I entered a relationship that looked like love from the outside but felt empty within. It taught me the hardest lesson, that not all "affection is love, and not all attention is care." Through it all, a part of me still remembered him. Not loudly. Just quietly. Like a feeling you don’t question.

Years later, our paths crossed again. He believed I had never loved him. He didn’t know that all I had ever wanted was closeness, not labels, not promises, just the comfort of being near him. To talk without fear. To exist without judgment.

Today, it has been six months since we chose each other. Miles separate us, yet our dreams align in the same direction. Long distance tests patience, but it also reveals truth. Some people don’t disappear from your life, they wait for the right time to return.

I used to think home was a place.

Now I know ,.it’s a feeling.

And I found it again, in his eyes.

वो आया था बचपन में,

बिना शोर, बिना वादों के।

मैं मोहब्बत से अनजान थी,

पर दिल को उसकी आदत हो गई।

वक़्त, अफ़वाहें, दूरियाँ—

सबने हमें आज़माया,

मगर जो एहसास सच होता है,

वो कहीं जाता नहीं।

आज फासले हैं,