Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Tian Ruan silently lowered his robe, straightened his back and legs, and stood stiffly like a baked sweet potato.

Yu Jingmo averted his gaze, set down the ceramic cup in his hand, and said, "This is longan-red date milk. It boosts energy and blood circulation and aids sleep."

Tian Ruan glared at him with embarrassment—his face was plenty flushed already.

Yu Jingmo: "...If you don’t want to drink it, you don’t have to." With that, he walked out.

Just outside the door, he paused and added, "I won’t come back. Sleep well."

Once the door closed, Tian Ruan immediately went to lock it—though the dignity he’d lost couldn’t be recovered, and the exposed skin was gone for good.

Seething with embarrassment, Tian Ruan pulled on a fresh pair of underwear, then bundled up like a burrito in the thin silk quilt and tossed restlessly.

Only after sweating under the covers did he finally free his sweaty face, exhausted and drowsy, before falling asleep.

His early-riser habits from his student days were still intact. At exactly 6:30 a.m., Tian Ruan woke up to an unfamiliar bed and an unfamiliar bedroom. It took him a good ten seconds to remember—he had isekai’d into a novel, becoming the doomed stepdad in a melodramatic Boys’ Love story.

By his calculations, he might not even survive two more years before meeting his end.

Tian Ruan jolted awake, his instincts flaring just as a knock sounded at the door.

"Who is it?"

"Madam, it’s time for breakfast."

"..."

Tian Ruan got up, washed his face, brushed his teeth, picked out a clean set of loungewear from the wardrobe, and shuffled out.

Waiting outside was the same servant who had been the first to congratulate him last night—a kindly-looking woman in her fifties whom everyone called Liu Ma. Not only was she hardworking but also a killer cook.

"I wasn’t sure what Madam likes to eat, so I simply steamed some soup dumplings, pan-fried buns, pork dumplings (shaomai), and sweet porridge."

Tian Ruan: "I’ll eat anything. Just don’t call me Madam." *(Note: In Chinese culture, calling a man “Madam” can be awkward due to its gender-specific connotations.)*

Liu Ma chuckled. "You newlywed men are always so shy. You’ll get used to it soon."

He stared blankly. As a grown man, he would never get used to being called "Madam."

The living room downstairs connected directly to the dining area, where a long rectangular table stretched nearly five meters. Two people were already seated there, sitting at a polite distance.

At the head of the table, naturally, sat Yu Jingmo. A meter to his right sat Yu Shang. The father and son ate in silence, their manners regal as royalty.

Yu Jingmo glanced at Tian Ruan. "You didn’t have to get up yet."

Tian Ruan: "No need."

Yu Shang’s face twitched, and he gave Tian Ruan a loaded glance.

The butler pulled out the chair a meter to Yu Jingmo’s left, laid a napkin neatly beside the table, and discreetly added a cushion to the seat—something none of the other chairs had.

Tian Ruan: "..."

Clearly, the butler assumed he was... sore there.

"No cushion," Tian Ruan snapped, face burning.

The butler said, "Ma'am, if you're feeling unwell..."

"Not unwell at all, perfectly fine."

The butler smiled with admiration. "Ma'am is truly tough as nails, a perfect match for the boss." As he spoke, he bent down to remove the cushion.

Tian Ruan: "..." Just endure a little longer, I'll be leaving soon.

Tian Ruan sat down awkwardly, enjoying the royal treatment. Soup dumplings and shengjian bao were arranged before him in order, and the congee was respectfully placed in front of him.

The sweet congee was made sticky with japonica and sticky rice, topped with a layer of red bean paste and sprinkled with osmanthus blossoms. Tian Ruan picked up a spoon and took a sip—it was sweet and fragrant, with fresh osmanthus.

He then tried the shengjian bao. The skin was soft and tender, the bottom crispy, and the meat filling savory and rich. Each bite burst with flavor, warming him from the inside.

Tian Ruan's expression relaxed, and he couldn't help but let out a satisfied "Mmm…"

Yu Jingmo paused while eating his congee.

Yu Shang glanced at the "stepdad" across the table.

Tian Ruan slowed his chewing until he finished, then said, "So good."

Yu Jingmo replied calmly, "Let Liu Ma know your favorites."

"Mmm…"

After breakfast, Yu Shang left for school, and Yu Jingmo went to work, leaving Tian Ruan stuck at "home."

No honeymoon for a newlywed—clearly, this was a sham marriage.

Seeing how much Tian Ruan enjoyed the shengjian bao, Liu Ma grinned and promised to make them again the next morning.

Tian Ruan hesitated for a second but firmly resisted the temptation. They were just shengjian bao—he could eat them outside. He couldn’t afford to cave in.

He returned to his room to ponder a discreet escape plan when suddenly, his phone rang. After searching, he found it on the desk.

Caller ID: Fat Pig.

Tian Ruan: "..."

Clearly, this was Tian Yuan’s phone—an Apple phone from five or six years ago. Though still functional with a new case, there was a faint crack in the tempered glass. Whether it was due to lack of time or money to replace it was unclear.

After a moment’s thought, Tian Ruan swiped to answer. "Hello, Fat Pig?"

The other end: "...Who the hell you callin’?"

Tian Ruan immediately hung up.

Four or five seconds later, the phone rang again.

Tian Ruan answered: "Fat Pig?"

A gruff middle-aged voice replied, "Well, well, Tian Yuan, now that you’ve moved up in the world, you’ve forgotten who helped you out, huh?"

Tian Ruan: "Do I know you?"

The guy kept cussing, so Tian Ruan hung up again and blocked him.

After blocking, Tian Ruan suddenly felt the voice rang a bell—perhaps one of the male guests from last night’s wedding banquet. Meh, whatever. He shrugged it off.

The phone rang again, this time with a WeChat video call.

Contact name: Fat Pig.

Tian Ruan: "..." What kind of grudge did Tian Yuan have against this "Fat Pig"?

Tian Ruan was also curious about who exactly hid behind the "Fat Pig" nickname—perhaps someone connected to the original owner's death. He answered again, "Hello."

"If you hang up on me again, Tian Yuan, I'll kill your mother right now."

"If you keep swearing, I'll call the police immediately. I've already recorded this."

"..."

The other end panted heavily before retorting, "Who's the one insulting here? What do you mean by calling me Fat Pig?"

Tian Ruan speculated, "Maybe you're fat?"

"Cut the crap. Just tell me—did you sleep with Yu Jingmo last night or not?"

Click. Tian Ruan hung up again and blocked the number.

Tian Ruan muttered, "What a piece of work! Clearly a bad guy."

Whether good or bad, as long as he avoided contact, he could prevent the possibility of death. Tian Ruan went through the contacts and was surprised to find there were 'Dad' and 'Mom,' while others were labeled with nicknames like "Fat Pig" or "Skinny Monkey."

If Tian Yuan had parents, they should have attended the wedding. This suggested they were either dead or divorced and never seen again.

Tian Ruan put down the phone and started exploring the estate's layout, searching for an "escape" route.

As soon as he went downstairs, three or four servants called him 'Madam.'

Tian Ruan let it slide—after all, he wouldn't see them tomorrow anyway.

Walking through the estate, the butler followed silently, as unnoticeable as a shadow. At times, Tian Ruan even forgot the butler was there...

"Madam, what are you doing?" The butler piped up.

Tian Ruan had already placed one foot on the fence but casually lowered it and said, "Just getting some air."

"There's exercise equipment over there."

"Oh." Tian Ruan then headed to the outdoor fitness area to do sit-ups, kicking his legs, twisting his waist, and swinging on the swings.

The swings were fun—soaring high, he could see the lush greenery far below, the towering buildings, and the river winding through.

Tian Ruan looked up. The autumn sky was clear and brilliantly blue, with planes occasionally passing through the white clouds. Sparrows and orioles perched on branches or flitted past golden and crimson maple leaves, their chirping filled the air.

Everything seemed peaceful, perfect weather.

Tian Ruan almost forgot himself in such beauty until a servant called from a distance, "Madam, Sir is home!"

Tian Ruan:

?

Why was he back? That was written all over Tian Ruan's face as he saw Yu Jingmo.

He didn't say it aloud, but Yu Jingmo couldn't ignore the expression. "I'm not welcome?" Tian Ruan's confusion deepened. "It's your house."

Yu Jingmo's face visibly turned cold. Though he was normally aloof, it hadn't been like this in the morning. Tian Ruan wondered if he had said something wrong, but after thinking it over, he couldn't find any mistake.

Liu Ma broke in cheerfully: "It's rare for you to come back for lunch, sir. Is there anything you'd like to eat?"

Yu Jingmo: "Maoxuewang [spicy blood curd stew], suan cai yu [pickled cabbage fish], spicy chicken, shui zhu rou pian [water-boiled meat slices], and fish head with chopped chili."

Liu Ma: "...These are all spicy dishes. Are you and your wife sure?"

Tian Ruan: "Spicy is good. When it's cold, you should eat something spicy."

If there was one dish from high school cafeteria that Tian Ruan would never forget, it had to be spicy chicken—it made you eat more rice.

Yu Jingmo sneered, "The spicier, the better."

Then came lunchtime.

Tian Ruan ate panting from the heat, occasionally sipping lemon water to ease the heat. In contrast, Yu Jingmo was utterly unfazed—calmly eating plain rice, hardly touching the spicy dishes.

Tian Ruan: "...Why aren’t you eating?"

Yu Jingmo: "Since you like it, you should eat more."

Tian Ruan suspected Yu Jingmo was trying to kill him with spice.

Tian Ruan needled: "You just can’t handle spicy food, can you?"

Yu Jingmo: "Yeah."

Tian Ruan felt like punching cotton—all force with no effect—and even spicier. Unable to bear it, he wolfed down three bowls of rice. Now he suspected Yu Jingmo was trying to stuff him to death... This marriage was unbearable.

In the evening, Tian Ruan and Yu Jingmo met for the third time that day. This time, Tian Ruan was much more subdued because an escape plan had already formed in his mind—

After a peaceful dinner, Tian Ruan quietly relished the taste of steamed egg with clams before heading upstairs to his room.

The bedroom had been cleaned, the bedding changed, and the pair of bright red mandarin duck pillowcases had naturally been removed. Tian Ruan opened the wardrobe, rummaged through the drawers, and sure enough, found his documents—an ID card, a hukou booklet [household registration document], and a driver's license.

Tian Ruan couldn’t drive, but he still took the license out—just in case.

He couldn’t find a suitcase, not even a backpack. He wasn’t sure if his original self hadn't brought one or if it had been thrown away after arriving. Giving up, Tian Ruan went to the bathroom to wash up.

Some time later, there was a knock on the door.

Tian Ruan got out of bed and unlocked the door to find Liu Ma standing outside.

Liu Ma was holding a white porcelain soup bowl, smiling. "This is peach resin milk that the sir asked me to prepare for you, the mistress."

"Oh, thanks." Tian Ruan took the bowl.

Liu Ma: "Peach resin is great for your complexion."

"..."

Tian Ruan sipped the milk and soon felt drowsy. He grabbed his phone, set an alarm for 3 a.m., and then fell asleep.

Startled awake by the alarm, emotion told him to stay in bed, but reason told him this was the best chance to escape—miss this chance and it's gone.

Groping his way to the bathroom, Tian Ruan splashed cold water on his face, and once fully awake, started gathering his things to run away.

Not having a backpack was a small problem. Inspired by ancient Chinese dramas, Tian Ruan wrapped his clothes in a large scarf, hoisted it over his shoulder, and prepared to flee.

Tian Ruan glanced at himself in the full-length mirror, feeling like a frail scholar from ancient times who had been lured home by a seductive fox spirit and was now plotting his desperate escape.

The frail scholar had already mapped out his escape route. During his daytime strolls around the estate, he had noticed an osmanthus tree near the garden fence in the backyard. It was the season when the osmanthus flowers were fragrant, and he had deliberately walked under the tree, feigning interest in the blossoms while actually assessing whether it was climbable.

His conclusion was yes—it was climbable. Moreover, one of its branches extended beyond the fence, like a beckoning path to freedom.

Tian Ruan slipped downstairs unnoticed, traversed a dimly lit, endless corridor, and arrived at the back door.

The back door of the main house had a simple latch, left unlocked for the staff. Tian Ruan slowly unlatched it, crossed the garden courtyard under the pale moonlight, and made his way to the osmanthus tree.

A faint red LED blinked in the shadows, unnoticed by Tian Ruan. He successfully reached the tree.

The osmanthus fragrance was particularly delightful. Tian Ruan deftly climbed onto the branch that led to freedom, snatching a handful of blossoms and stuffing them into his shirt, then leaped lightly onto the grass and vanished into the night, fleeing the Yu residence.

At dawn, the estate’s servants bustled with morning chores.

The housekeeper directed the gardeners to the backyard to trim the trees and flowers. Amid the growl of the lawnmower, the estate began another busy day.

As Yu Jingmo passed by the guest room, he rapped lightly on the door. "Time to get up."

There was no response.

Yu Jingmo turned the knob and entered. The bed was neatly made, and the bathroom was eerily empty. He headed downstairs, where only Liu Ma and another servant were busy preparing breakfast in the dining room.

"Have you seen Tian Yuan?" Yu Jingmo asked.

Liu Ma looked surprised. "The mistress? She’d still be abed at this hour."

Yu Jingmo stepped out of the main house and crossed paths with Yu Shang. "Have you seen Tian Yuan?"

Yu Shang looked puzzled. "No."

Yu Jingmo marched toward the surveillance room in the annex. Yu Shang followed silently.

Inside the surveillance room—though usually empty, it was cleaned daily and the equipment regularly checked—a security guard was on duty. The guard, startled by Yu Jingmo’s stormy expression and coiled intensity, stammered, "Mr. Yu, what’s wrong?"

Yu Jingmo, with the tone of an ex-soldier, commanded, "Pull up the estate’s surveillance footage from early this morning."

The guard hurriedly sat before a computer screen, typing and clicking the mouse until the footage from midnight onward appeared. The screen was filled with small rectangular frames, capturing every corner of the estate.

As the timestamp in the upper right advanced, at 3:35 a.m., a sneaky silhouette slipped out of the main house’s back door.

The guard’s jaw dropped. "Is that... Madam?"

Yu Jingmo watched expressionlessly as Tian Ruan exited the back door, crossed the garden, and headed straight for the osmanthus tree by the fence. Only when he saw the ludicrously tied bundle slung over Tian Ruan’s shoulder did a smirk tug at his lips.

After a long silence, Yu Shang asked, "Did he... run away from home?"

In the footage, Tian Ruan climbed the tree with the grace of a seasoned thief and leaped from the three-meter-high branch as agilely as a feline.

Yu Jingmo felt equal parts exasperated and tickled, though his face remained composed. Tian Ruan’s escape had confirmed one thing beyond doubt: this was definitely not Tian Yuan.

Just then, the housekeeper entered, sensing the strange atmosphere and hesitating to speak. His eyes flicked to the surveillance screen, where Tian Ruan was looping his great escape—especially the tree-climbing segment, which Yu Jingmo kept rewatching, making Tian Ruan look like a squirrel scampering back and forth on the branches.

The housekeeper: "???"

Yu Jingmo calmly ordered, "Round up the guards. We’re going down the mountain to retrieve... my wayward spouse."

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