The light We Once Had

The first time I saw a firefly,

I thought it was magic.

I was nine, standing barefoot on the grass outside our house, chasing tiny flickers of light in the dark. They glowed softly—appearing, disappearing—like they were alive in a way I couldn’t understand. I remember trying to catch one, closing my hands gently as if I could keep its light forever.

But when I opened them… it was gone.

My mom once told me, “Some lights aren’t meant to be kept, Jimei. They’re only meant to be seen.”

I didn’t understand it back then.

Not until I met him.

—

“Jimei! Wait up!”

I didn’t have to turn around. I already knew who it was.

Justine.

He caught up beside me, slightly out of breath, his usual easy smile on his face. His hair was messy like he had just run his hands through it, and his uniform looked like he didn’t really care how he looked—as long as he made it on time.

“You’re late again,” I said, raising an eyebrow.

“Not really,” he shrugged. “I just wanted to walk with you.”

I rolled my eyes, pretending it didn’t affect me. But inside, something warm settled quietly in my chest.

We had been neighbors for years. Same street, same school, same everyday routine. Somewhere between borrowed notes, shared snacks, and walking home together…

He became my favorite part of the day.

...****************...

There was nothing dramatic about us.

No confessions under the rain. No grand promises. No labels.

Just simple moments.

Like sitting on the pavement, watching the sky turn shades of orange as the sun slowly disappeared.

“Hey,” Justine said one afternoon, lying beside me, staring at the sky. “If you could relive one moment over and over again, what would it be?”

I didn’t think twice. “This.”

He turned his head slightly, surprised. “Really?”

“Yeah,” I nodded softly. “It’s quiet. Peaceful. No problems.”

I paused.

I looked at him.

“And you’re here.”

For a second, he didn’t say anything. The silence between us felt heavier—but not uncomfortable. Just… full.

Then he smiled.

“Same,” he whispered.

And just like that, something unspoken settled between us.

—

I didn’t realize I was falling in love.

Not until everything about him started to matter more than it should.

The way he laughed.

The way he said my name.

The way he looked at me like I was someone worth noticing.

It wasn’t loud.

It wasn’t overwhelming.

It was soft.

Like a firefly glowing in the dark—small, but impossible to ignore.

-

"jimei!" he called from afar

I turned around and saw him running towards me—holding a bouquet of lilies.

I liked them.

And,

He remembered.

"Yeah? What's with the flower's?" I chuckled jokingly to him.

But there's a hint of a smile on my face, it was brief, but it's there.

"I made it!" he says proudly while saying it breathless because of running.

 "here!" he handed it to me smiling.

There it was again.

That smile,

How can I ever refuse that smile.

"Thank you…" I bought the lilies to my nose to smell "it smells nice…and, you remembered that?"

"Of course! It was you after all" he giggled

"And actually I have more surprises" He put his hands on the back of his neck like a shy little high school boy.

"Eh? More?...you better not scare me again!" I asked curiously and curiously with a hint of fondness

"O-of course…no!" He explained frantically "Well can you put this on?" he handed me a red scarf to cover my eyes.

I think for a minute.

"okay.Just this once" I teased

-

We walked there.

I felt a grass hitting my feet, and I am lying if I say I didn't love this moment with him.

"Okay you can remove them now" he says proudly.

As I started to remove the folds.

A cold breeze hit my face.

There it was—

Magical, Beautiful and glowing.

Fireflies.

And I am standing in the middle with so many of them flying.

Suddenly a small firefly flew to my hands and rested there.

"So… What do you say? Jimei…i prepared this for you....for us." He looked so genuine that time, The kind of person you won't suspect to leave.

The firefly got started by his voice and flew away.

I looked at him lovingly that night.

"It's pretty…" my eyes looked like it could cry any minute "Justine...this…this is wonderful…"

That time we played all night,

Together,

selfless,

And

Full of love.

...****************...

But just like that firefly I once tried to hold onto…

Some things don’t stay.

And I was about to learn that the hard way.

.

.

.

.

To be continued…

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