Chapter 5-Elio

By the time we were completely engrossed in the conversation, Yasmin’s phone interrupted us with Howl’s Moving Castle’s soundtrack.
 “Ah—sorry, it’s Ryan,” she murmured apologetically before answering.

The air shifted a little. I pulled out my phone, pretending to scroll, though I couldn’t help listening in.
 “Hey, what’s up?”
 “I’m still with Elio—he helped me log in, and we just found out we have every single one of our classes together.”

She smiled at me as she said it, her eyes lighting up. The way she looked genuinely happy about us sharing classes made something tighten in my chest. I wasn’t sure how Ryan would take that—probably not the way she hoped.

“By the way, how’s it going with your errand?” she asked him. I doubted he’d mentioned Jessica.
 “Oh, okay. I’m a little hungry now, so I think I might get something to eat,” she continued.

I glanced at the time—already 3 p.m. No wonder she was hungry. The hours had slipped past without either of us noticing.
 “Nah, don’t worry, I’ll figure it out anyway. Bye,” she said before hanging up.

She turned back to me.
 “Sorry, it was Ryan.”
 “Did anything happen? Why did he call?” I asked, trying to keep my curiosity from showing.
 “No, he’s just in the middle of his errand and thought I’d already gone home—since I usually don’t enjoy hanging out with guys much.”
 “Ouch, that hurts.” I pressed a hand to my chest dramatically, though part of me meant it.

“Sorry.” She chuckled softly. “I just tend to be a lot more comfortable with girls. But I really do enjoy talking with you.”

That eased the sting. More than it should have.
 “Don’t worry,” I grinned, covering up the relief in my chest. “I was just messing around. Actually—want to grab lunch? I know a burger place nearby. I’m starving.”

“Oh, um… I don’t know about that.” She hesitated, her voice dipping awkwardly. “I’m not sure if it’s halal, and as much as I’ve really enjoyed your company, I think I should eat at home.”

I blinked. Definitely hadn’t expected that.
 “Oh—wait. Did I make you uncomfortable or something?” I asked quickly. The last thing I wanted was for her to feel uneasy with me.

She gave me a small, apologetic smile.
 “No, I genuinely enjoy your company. It’s just… I’m not comfortable going out with a guy alone. I know it might seem weird—especially since technically we’re hanging out right now, but…”

She exhaled, closed her eyes, and covered her mouth with her hands, cheeks blooming pink.
 “I’m so sorry—I’m making this weird when you’re just trying to be nice. What I mean is—”

Her eyes opened again, locking on mine. Timid, but steady. And paired with the flush of her cheeks and the softness of her lips, it was enough to send a jolt through me. She had no idea the effect she had.

“I’m not used to hanging out one-on-one with guys. I might even be a little awkward because of it. I know here in America it’s normal, but it’s not something I personally see favorably. So… I really enjoyed your help, and I really like you as a person, but I think I need to go home and recharge my social battery.”

Her words spilled faster and faster, her cheeks reddening with each one. And yet, all I could think was how endearing her awkwardness was.

“Hey, Yasmin—don’t worry. That’s totally fine. I just didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable, that’s all. I don’t think it’s weird—that’s just the way you feel, and that’s okay. I’m not some asshole who’s going to force you or judge you. And about that burger place—it’s halal. Ryan goes there all the time. If you ever want to, you should try it. But really—don’t stress. Go home and take care of yourself.”

I gave her the warmest smile I could. Part of me was disappointed, sure—but a bigger part respected her for being so honest. That kind of clarity was rare.
 “Okay.” She smiled back, her face returning to its porcelain glow. “I’m sorry,” she added softly.
 “Don’t sweat it, it’s fine. So—I’ll see you tomorrow?”
 “Definitely.” She gave me one last grateful smile before walking away, leaving behind that subtle vanilla scent. Faint, but enough to keep me standing there longer than I should have.

A few minutes later, I followed her footsteps home. I didn’t really have a reason to stay out longer, and honestly… I was absolutely smashed.

As soon as I got into my apartment, I collapsed on the couch and ordered food from that burger place. Their burgers were amazing, and I really, really needed one right now.

But my brain… oh man, it was still stuck on that conversation with Yasmin. I respected her boundaries, sure, but I couldn’t wrap my head around it. I didn’t mean to be an asshole, but how could getting a burger together possibly be “bad” or make her uncomfortable? Especially since she said she appreciated me.

Wait… did she just say that to get away? Like some girls give a guy their number and then block him later? But she seemed… genuinely genuine. I don’t get it.

And… does this have to do with her being Muslim or Moroccan? That doesn’t fully make sense either. Ryan’s Muslim and Moroccan too, and he definitely doesn’t care about those things, seeing where he’s at right now.

The more I thought about it, the more confused I got. And the worst part? I couldn’t ask anyone about it. I don’t really have Muslim or Arab friends besides Ryan. I’m not the type to have female friends either. And asking my mom? Not a chance. She’d never let it go.

Ryan… yeah, that would basically be suicide. He would destroy me if he even thought I was asking about his “precious cousin.” I didn’t even want to imagine it.

So… I turned to my only other option: Celia .

My older sister, who had treated me like a doll—a practice model and an actual model—ever since I was born. Now was finally my time to get even. I knew she wouldn’t say anything to Mom, and surprisingly, she also had a few good pieces of advice. So I called her.

“What,” I heard her voice through the phone.
 “I got a question.”
 “Mhm.”
 “So there’s this girl—” I started.
 “WHAT, YOU HAVE A GIRL? I THOUGHT YOU AND RYAN WERE GAY.”
 “What.” I was dumbfounded.
 “Oh wait, sorry, you can finish. I’m actually super invested right now.”
 “No, wait—what do you mean you thought me and Ryan were gay?”
 “I mean, can you blame me? You invited him over during our family dinners years ago, and he’s been coming every month since. I thought you were introducing your boyfriend to mom. Also, I never heard you talk about girls. Anyways, continue.”

I sighed. “Whatever.”
 “Con. Ti. Nue.”
 “So basically, Ryan’s cousin—his childhood friend—came here from Morocco to do her last semester in architecture.”
 “Mhm.”
 “And the three of us are doing the grad project together. Now the thing is that today, Ryan asked me to help her log in to her school stuff and check her classes with her. Turns out we have all our classes together.”
 “Ooh.”
 “Can I finish?”
 “Yeah, sorry.”
 “Now the thing is that we ended up talking for hours after, and then Ryan called. She mentioned that she was hungry, so I asked if she wanted lunch at a nearby burger place. She said no—wasn’t sure if it was halal and said she’s not comfortable hanging out one-on-one with guys.”
 “So what are you asking?”
 “I don’t know—do you think I made her uncomfortable or something? Like, did I do something wrong?”
 “Hmmm, I wouldn’t say you did something wrong, but you have to remember that the girl met you, what, yesterday? So of course she wouldn’t be comfortable going somewhere with you.”
 “But we were together at the café.”
 “Yeah, because she needed help with something and Ryan recommended you. Like, even if you guys had a great time and talked for hours, it doesn’t change the fact that she originally came there for something she needed, not because she wanted to see you. Get it?”
 “Yeah, I guess. But it’s just a burger.”
 “Elio, stop avoiding the point. Plus, since she’s cousins or whatever with Ryan, I’m guessing she’s Muslim.”
 “Uh, she had a hijab, so I guess so.”
 “Yeah, well, Muslim girls—at least the ones I know—prefer hanging out with other girls than with guys. Plus, I’m pretty sure that in their culture it isn’t viewed well.”
 “Oh, okay. So that means she doesn’t feel uncomfortable around me or anything, right?”
 “Yeah, I don’t think so. I mean, did you press her to stay or try to convince her?”
 “No, I told her it was fine if she didn’t want to and that we could just see each other tomorrow in class.”
 “Aww, look at you, all grown up, acting like a gentleman. Anyways, how does Ryan feel about that?”
 “About what?”
 “I don’t know, you liking his cousin.”
 “I didn’t tell him. I mean, it’s not like I like her—she’s just pretty… I think.”
 “Right. I do think you should tell him, though.”
 “I told you, it’s not like that. Anyways, thanks.”
 “Wait, El—”
 And I hung up.

Ughhhh. My brain was spinning. I wasn’t really familiar with any of this, but I do think I understood the baseline, which is: I’m not the problem. And that was enough for me—especially since that meant she was honest when she said she appreciated me as a person.

Also, that meant I did get a chance to get closer to her.

I still didn’t understand the way I felt, since it was my first time really looking at a girl like—
 I couldn’t take my eyes off her, and I felt like gravity was always pushing me toward her. But I don’t know; it felt really ridiculous. I mean, I saw her for the first time not even 24 hours ago, and I was already like this, asking advice from my big sister like a loser.

Oh god, I felt my neck heat up. My mind couldn’t stop going back to her face earlier, with those timid eyes and those thick black lashes coating them, those rosy cheeks and those lips—I don’t know what she did to them, but they had a little glitter in them, and they almost looked like glass from how much they shined.

She looked absolutely adorable with those hairpins and that bow on her hijab. Her fingers—they were long and slender, her nails a little long, and her rings decorated her hands perfectly. I could tell her hands were much smaller than mine and her—

Ding dong. I received a notification on my phone. The food was here. I sighed before going to open the door.

What’s wrong with me?

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