may 30-31st

On May 30th (Saturday), my twin sister went to visit her boyfriend at his house, my dad had been at work since Thursday night, and my mom went to visit my great grandma. I was alone for most of the day, and at around 7:20 my older sister picked up my twin and me for a movie night with just us 3. It was a good night.

We were having a good night, we got some food, we were talking for a while, and then watched a horror movie. We were supposed to be home by like 10pm, but we always underestimate how much we will talk and we ended up getting home at midnight.

That was the first time since Thursday night that i saw my dad, and one of the first things he talked to me about was my final exams i took on Friday. My mom had told him i did really bad on them. On my Accelerated Chemistry exam, i got a 66%, which is almost failing. In Accelerated Algebra 2 exam i got a 57%, an F, so i failed it.

My dad is more strict than the rest of my family about my grades, and he congratulated my twin for getting a B on her chemistry one and a 78% on her algebra 2 one. He told me I could've done better, all that shit.

So i was upset, I was feeling horrible that day of my exams. if i didn't have exams that day i would've stayed home it was that bad.

I didn't know my great grandma was doing so bad though. At my sister's house, my mom called us to ask my older sister if she was going to visit Mom mom (great grandma) because they didn't know how much time she had left and thought she wouldn't make it through the night, she told us that at 11:40.

We were upset, i didn't even know mom mom was doing that bad.

I hadn't seen mom mom since pawpaws funeral in January (her husband/my great grandpa). My mom at first didn't think me and my twin should've seen her. but me, my twin and older sister were planning to visit her today (May 31st), but at 12:17am i was with my dad when he got the call saying mom mom didn't make it.

My older sister had just texted me and my twin at 12:16 am saying to be ready in the morning by 9am to see Mom mom, i replied and said okay, and then all i said was "we aren't going" because i had literally just heard she passed. My mom, twin, and older sister didn't know yet. I just kind of sat there, cause pawpaw died on January 14th, and i found out by my dad sending me a text right after i got out of school. His funeral was January 20th. I hadn't seen mom mom since.

I tried reaching out to friends, 1 read it and didn't answer, 1 did answer but then i said she died and he said "oh" and then left me on read. i wanted to talk to my twin, but she just went to her room and called her boyfriend. She has people to go to, and i don't. I was angry because i just wanted a hug and someone to talk to me. My mom and dad had gone up to Mom mom after she died to take care of stuff.

I don't know why im writing all of this, nobody really cares. But i hope it helps me at least a little bit.

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