Chapter 1.

Autumn had finally arrived.

The trees surrounding the lake had begun their annual surrender, releasing golden and crimson leaves into the wind. They drifted lazily through the air before settling upon the water's surface, where they floated like tiny forgotten boats. The sky was painted in shades of amber and pale gold, and the cool afternoon breeze carried the scent of earth, smoke, and approaching winter.

I sat on an old wooden bench near the edge of the lake.

Beside me sat Terry.

My only lover.

A cigarette rested between my lips. The wire of our shared earphones tangled between us, connecting us in the simplest way possible. Through them played our song.

"Your lips, my lips, apocalypse..."

The music hummed softly against my ears.

My head rested on her shoulder.

I wasn't particularly sleepy. Truthfully, I hadn't been sleeping much lately. But there was something about Terry's warmth that melted away every restless thought in my mind. The world seemed softer when I was with her. Quieter.

I closed my eyes for a moment, breathing in the scent of her shampoo mixed with cigarette smoke.

I loved my girlfriend dearly.

More than dearly, perhaps.

The feeling had long since grown too large for any word I knew.

Without warning, Terry reached over and pulled the cigarette from between my lips. She brought it to her own mouth and took a drag, her lips wrapping around the exact spot mine had touched seconds before.

My heart stumbled.

The realization struck me instantly.

Technically...

We had just kissed.

She simply didn't know it.

A smile threatened to appear on my face.

I quickly looked away before she could notice.

The lake rippled gently before us.

I found myself staring at her reflection dancing across the water. The setting sun turned her image into something almost unreal. It looked like a painting rather than a person.

A beautiful one.

"What are you looking at?"

Her voice startled me.

I nearly jumped.

"Huh?"

She laughed.

"What are you staring at?"

Embarrassment flooded through me so quickly that it felt physical.

I looked away.

"Ah... nothing."

A terrible answer.

Even I knew it.

When I finally gathered enough courage to look back, I found Terry already watching me.

Directly.

God.

Everything about her affected me.

The shape of her eyes.

The curve of her smile.

The little crease that appeared between her brows whenever she was confused.

No matter how much we argued, no matter how many times we annoyed each other, we always found our way back.

Maybe because Terry wasn't just my girlfriend.

She was home.

"What?" she asked.

I swallowed.

The truth sat on the tip of my tongue.

You.

I was looking at you.

I always look at you.

Instead, I shrugged.

"I don't know."

Her eyebrow rose.

"I'm bored."

"You're bored?"

"Very."

Terry narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

I grinned.

"You're very boring, Terry."

The look she gave me should have been classified as a weapon.

"Oh."

"Yes."

"Oh?"

"Absolutely."

She scoffed.

I couldn't help laughing.

The truth was quite the opposite.

I could spend entire days sitting beside her without speaking a single word and never once feel bored.

But admitting that felt dangerous.

Not because it wasn't true.

Because it was.

And because I was afraid.

Afraid that if I loved something too openly, the universe would take it away.

So instead I teased her.

As if jokes could hide devotion.

As if sarcasm could disguise love.

"Don't you think?" I continued. "What else do you even do besides talk to me?"

She rolled her eyes.

"That's enough production work every day."

I laughed.

"I swear," she continued, smiling now, "I just love it."

The moment she smiled, my entire body betrayed me.

Heat rushed into my face.

Into my ears.

Into places I didn't even know could blush.

For one terrifying second, I forgot how to speak.

Her smile always did that.

Every single time.

The cigarette had long since burned away.

The music continued to play softly through our earphones.

The leaves continued to fall.

And somehow the world had shrunk until it consisted of only two people sitting on a bench.

Her.

And me.

I watched her for a moment longer.

Then another.

Then another.

Eventually she caught me staring.

Again.

"What now?"

I didn't answer.

Instead, I leaned forward.

Slowly.

Carefully.

Giving her every chance to stop me.

She didn't.

My lips brushed against hers.

A small kiss.

Soft enough to disappear if someone blinked.

For a second neither of us moved.

Then Terry's eyes widened.

Her cheeks turned pink.

Mine probably looked worse.

We stared at each other.

Then both of us burst into laughter.

"You kissed me."

"You looked kissable."

"That's not an excuse."

"It is."

"No, it isn't."

"Well, it's the one I'm using."

She shoved my shoulder.

I laughed harder.

The sound echoed across the lake.

For a while we sat there together, smiling like idiots beneath an autumn sky.

The lovers.

The dreamers.

The brave girls who were secretly cowards.

The cowards who somehow became brave for each other.

Best friends.

Girlfriends.

Future wives.

Everything at once.

The song ended.

Neither of us bothered changing it.

Instead, I rested my head back on her shoulder.

The leaves continued to fall around us.

The water shimmered.

And Terry's hand found mine.

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