I’m nothing like him

I have to wake up at 5:00 exactly because I take an hour shower and the bus comes at 7:15.

I turn off my alarm and pull my lilac covers off of my body, getting out of bed and heading to the shower.

I strip, turning the shower on and waiting for the water to warm up. Once it does I get in the shower and wash my hair, body, and finally my face. For about another thirty minutes I just stand there, letting the hot water consume my cold body. I get out of the shower, stepping into my foggy bathroom. I wipe the mirror of its fog so I can see my face. I grab my yellow toothbrush and squirt some toothpaste on it, brushing my teeth and quietly humming a tune I had heard the day before. When I’m done brushing my teeth I dry my face off and do my makeup. I get dressed, throwing on a black sweater with a white heart in the corner and pulling on a white pleated skirt. I lace up my red converse and grab my brush, brushing my long black hair and pulling it into a ponytail, leaving my red peices of hair framing my face.

I grab my backpack and head out the door at 7:05, seeing that my brother’s car wasn’t in the driveway. He never takes me to school, says that I’m too annoying to handle. I ignore his daily insults so they never affect me. Not on the outside at least. I pull my phone out and check the time right as the bus arrives. I get on, walking to the very back against my will because the little kids take up the whole front. I finally find a seat and throw my backpack by the window and sit down. I turn to my right, making eye contact with the one and only, Kai. I smile a sweet smile to her, but she doesn’t return it. Her joyful expression quickly turned sour once she saw who I was. But, despite her disgusted look towards me, I talk to her.

“Hey. How’s it goin?” I ask. She rolls her eyes at me and turns to look out of her window. I turn my body in the small bus seat so I’m fully facing her.

“What’s wrong? Did I do something to upset you?” I ask. I know I didn’t do anything, I just decided to not say anything to piss her off more than she already seems to be. She sighs and starts talking to me.

“You’re Azail’s twin sister, yes?” She asks, raising an eyebrow. I furrow mine.

“Yeah, why?”

“That explains anything, and everything.” She says in a hateful tone.

“I’m nothing like him if that’s what you’re implying.” I defend myself.

“I find that oh so hard to believe. I have heard a lot about you and I don’t give a damn if they’re rumors. And just you being Azail’s twin does a lot.” She narrows her eyes at me as if she hates me to the core. Maybe she does, but she only has rumors and my brother to back her hatred for me up.

“Kai, I’m nothing like my brother, I swear.”

“Prove it. How are you so different from him?”

“First of all he’s extremely homophobic-“

“What does that have to do with anything?” She interrupts.

“… I’m gay? Literally everyone knows, how did you not?” I awkwardly chuckle. She has a look of surprise on her face, but if only lasts for a few seconds. She nods her head, signaling for me to continue.

“He does anything he wants without giving two fucks, while I can’t do a lot of stuff because of my anxiety. He’s out partying while I’m inside in my room FaceTiming my friends. He’s jumping off the diving board into thirteen foot deep water while I’m in a lawn chair reading a book. I can’t do most things because of excessive fear and anxiety.” She nods her head again and continue elaborating on how I’m nothing like the horrid Azail.

“He has zero regards to what anyone thinks about him, so he says and does what ever he pleases. It hurts my image, making people like you for example, hate my guts. He’ll get into fist fights, talk back to adults, ‘put people in their place’, and he does all of it with out caring that it’s making people not want to be anywhere near me. I’m lucky to have met my friend group when I did, because if I didn’t I would be a loner. Sure I don’t think before I speak or act, but it’s a serious problem for me, it’s hard for me to control. He just does it to do it.” I turn back and sit the right way in my seat, pulling my backpack into my lap so I can mess with all of the charms I have on it.

“Well, I heard that you told Sydney Rowan she was a stupid bitch because she wouldn’t let you copy off of her.”

“What? No. That’s not what happened. She called me a stupid bitch because I wouldn’t let her copy off of me. She likes to make me seem like a bad guy. She always does. So if you ever hear a rumor about me, she’s bound to be the one to have started it.” I roll my eyes. Sydney’s always been “jealous” of me. I have no idea why. I haven’t done anything to her. She just hates my guts.

“... that makes sense...” Kai slowly says. She faces forward and has an unexplainable expression on her face. I turn forwards again, looking at Kai out of the corner of my eye, and I see her eyes soften. The bus stops at the high school and Kai and I stand up. We step off of the bus and i starts walking to the main doors. A small part of me hopes that she’ll call my name, that she’ll stop me from walking inside the school... But she doesn’t. I don’t know what I expected. For her to suddenly want to be friends with me? For her to automatically like me? Who knows. I just can’t get my hopes up. I refuse to be helpless again. I refuse to want someone to have mutual feelings.

I just want to have a normal rest of the year without obsessing over someone and assuming their feelings.

But I have a hunch that that’s not going to happen.

...----------------...

Hi! I’m Zay and this is my first thingy thing to submit or whatever. I really hope you like this and I’m sorry it’s sorta short or whatever, not all of my episodes/chapters will be this short. Fun fact: A very small bit of this is based off of my love life.

Kk, Bye-Bye,

\~Zay 😙✌️

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