Why did this happen

This all have to start off from 12 years ago i was 5 years old. I saw an crash happening right in front of me, but I didn’t do anything i just watched it happen. One old woman died during the crash i was small so I didn’t remember the name. her son luckily survived but was badly injured. From that time his face was covered with a mask. After that day everything changed..... no one likes me even my best friend betraded me, my father disliked me too. Everything was good till that day, everything changed. I guess it was god who cursed me because I didn’t save the grandma on the car but i really can’t, I’m sorry. I remember that was the last time I cried. I never known where my mom has gone to i want to see you really bad at least for once, if I really have the chance. Within two weeks i am going to be in college, i am kinda excited. \~Two weeks later\~

my test is over i got 9012 points. It was as expected, i am going to the best college in the whole city. No one knows about that i have no heart in this college maybe i can make friends if i can. Who would know if I don’t say it hehe. Today is the first day of college.... someone actually talked to me and want to be my friend! “Hello i am Le Le, can i ask what’s your name?” “Hi i am Gu XiaoLi you can call me XiaoLi” from that moment i felt a strange feeling in my chest. I never had this type of feeling before. What is this feeling? I don’t know what it is, its warm, i liked it. But it only lasted for one second. Then its gone. I think its her who made me have this type of feelings in my chest. Who is Le Le, and what did she do to me? I think i might have to go to the hospital again, i might got tired from these days from sleeping late and working the whole day. I need some rest. People here at this college is all pretty nice to me but i all was have the feeling for some reason. What could it be, nope never mind i just go to the doctors not a big deal. “XiaoLi come here i got something for you.” “What is it?” I asked. “XiaoLi try these, they are a new flavor candy.” “Wow! These taste good but also sour.” “That’s right, they are sweet and sour.” Said Le Le. I suddenly have a strange feeling in my chest again. “Le Le I don’t feel good, i need some rest.” “Okay, XiaoLi, lets hang out tomorrow then, good-bye.” I have made an appointment for the doctors tomorrow. \~the next day\~ “you are healthy, I don’t know what’s wrong with you, but I can’t measure your heart rate. Anything else than that your healthy, you’re probably too tired get more rest you’ll be fine.” Said the doctor. “Ok thank you so much doctor.” Is it really because of Le Le i feel like my chest is warm?

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